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How To Pick Up Shy Girls

Updated on April 9, 2010

Shy girls can be animals.

I bet you are surprised to read that. But it is true.

Shy girls frequently have enormous reservoirs of pent-up sexual energy locked deep within the chasms and crannies of their being.

When released, that energy can explode into a supernova of lust, unleashing a savage carnal fury that will overwhelm you in its magnitude, crush you in its splendor, and make your nose hairs smoke.

Now, I know you're asking yourself, "How can I get me some of that?" The best advice to follow is to be careful. There are certain things you should never say to shy girls.

What You Should Never Say To Shy Girls

Remember that shy girls are self-conscious by nature and do not like to be the center of attention. So never approach a shy girl in a bar and say:

1. Wow, look at those Winnebegos.

2. How does it feel to be boring?

3. Boogaloogaloogaloogaloogaloo.

4. My god, you're homely.

5. Care to get naked in jello?

What You Should Always Say To Shy Girls

If you see a shy girl sitting alone in a bar and you want to meet her, here are several things to say to introduce yourself and put her at ease at the same time.

1. I'm going to sit down now, and I'm going to ask if you want another drink. Blink once for yes and twice for no.

2. I was shy once, too, you know, until I realized what a total bore I was.

3. Can I crawl up and hide between your thighs.

4. I've got a secret and I'll bet you've got a secret. So why don't I tell you mine, and then why don't you tell me yours. Mine is, I like to dress up in feathers.

5. Care to get naked in a closet?

Have you ever picked up a shy girl?

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    • Docmo profile image

      Mohan Kumar 5 years ago from UK

      Mmff. I agree with the reservoirs of pent up energy! I'am glad I never did the 'Winnebagos' line although can I crawl between did work sometimes. As for the jello I could write a whole hub about it myself. You are a hoot.

    • Cheeky Girl profile image

      Cassandra Mantis 7 years ago from UK and Nerujenia

      This is very funny. And yes, I did pick up shy girls a few times. As to the most recent girl - she's living with me now. And she's on Hub Pages - her name is Astra Nomik. As are other parts of her...but that's another story altogether. Good hub.