ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel
  • »
  • Gender and Relationships»
  • Relationship Problems & Advice

Is cheating on your spouse and losing your family and friends really worth it?

Updated on November 25, 2013

Cheating on your spouse,

Cheating on your spouse and losing your family? is it really worth it?

I will say a categorical No. and here is why!



I believe that the most precious possession a person can possess is their family.

I have come across a lot of miserable men and women who lose this precious treasure over an affair, which they absolutely believe will replace what they already have. They convince themselves that the grass on the other side is emerald green! What a fallacy!.

For one thing, the children are always terribly affected when they find out what is going on. Their world falls apart , and depending on how old they are, they will react in different ways. Some may begin to bed wet, they may have nightmares, or sleepless nights because they are worrying about what is happening, they may become angry and resentful towards their peers and adults. They may begin to play truant or bully other children . Their grades In school may drop. They may suffer panic attacks or become depressed

Your spouse will feel angry, bitter, worthless. depressed, ugly, they may lose confidence in themselves ETC, You may be so loved up, that this becomes the least of your problems. However, imagine being your son or daughter who has to be looked after by this messed up person! You may think, I will take the kids with me! Is this what your easy lover wants? OF COURSE NOT!

They are in it for the fun, not the long haul! on the other hand,your spouse, is committed to your future as a family!

Although you have convinced yourself that you haven’t done your spouse any harm, Mr Guilty conscience will will surely pay you a visit from time to time! And when he does visit he usually brings increased stress, anxiety ,depression, and domestic violence along as companions!

You will lose friends and family brcause they are not happy about how you have treated your spouse. You will also have less money to spend, as you will have to share it with your family! if you decide not to pay, child support, you will have to live with the guilt for a lifetime! , and also risk losing your children.

Remember! Easy come, easy go!

The other woman, or man, as the case may be, is usually in it for what they can get!

I promise you, they are almost always not in it for the long haul!

Do not decieve yourself!

Just because they tell you, you are the best thing since sliced bread,, doesn't make it true!

As the excerpt from this song by Phil Collins clearly shows!

Easy lover, she'll get a hold on you, believe it
She's like no other, before you know it, you'll be on your knees
She's an easy lover, she'll take your heart, but you won't feel it
She's like no other, and I'm just trying to make you see

She's the kind of girl you dream of, dream of getting hold of
You'd better forget it, you'll never get it
'Cos she'll play around and leave you, leave you and deceive you
You'd better forget it, ooh, you'll regret it

You're the one who wants to hold her, hold her and control her
You'd better forget it - I can't forget it, no - you'll never get it
'Cos she'll say that there's no other, till she finds another
You'd better forget it - oh no, no, no, no, no - you will regret it

And think about it, if someone is so selfish and heartless to make you leave your family!

They will eventually show you their heartless ways!

Last of all, as they say in Warri Nigeria,

'The thing when dey happen for goat house , dey happen for fowl house!

Meaning,

Whatever happens in the goats house, is also likely to happen in the chickens house,!

Think about it!

Another Nigerian adage says ; if you plant beans, you do not reap yams at harvest time!

Meaning,

'What you sew is wahy you reap!'

These words should be enough for the wise!

easy lover

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • profile image

      Brent 3 years ago

      I lost my best friend, my wife to an affair. I regret my ignorant and animalistic decision to cheat on her everyday. I lost the best thing that ever happened to me. I betrayed a woman who genuinely loved me. If you are in this position you understand the excruciating pain it causes everyone. My only hope is that God forgives me. I have a feeling my soon to be Exwife never will. And for that I am

      genuinely sorry.

    • tracy imevbore profile image
      Author

      tracy imevbore 3 years ago from england

      Hi Lucia I do not appreciate you using my hub as advertising space for a so called prophet

      I am therefore deleting your commment

    • profile image

      Tanya Florida USA 3 years ago

      My husband of 20 years was caught cheating with his young co worker. Hd blamed me for everything. To make a long story short, he left his family and his entire life. I filed for divorce. I will bog have someone disrespect me and my child in such evil ways. It was the hardest decision I ever made but the only choice I had. In the end he lost everything. For what, some more exciting sex with a young woman? off that he gave up his entire family. His son does not talk to him, everyone hates him. He will have to answer to God one day On the other hand I recovered from the pain and stress. I lost all material assets but I have gained my sanity, peace, freedom and most importantly my self respect. Don't let anyone cheat on you. Cheating is a choice and everything in luff has consequences.

    • tracy imevbore profile image
      Author

      tracy imevbore 3 years ago from england

      Really sorry to hear this! It causes soooooo much pain to everyone concerned!

      I would encourage you not to give up, if u really care fight for the relationship!

      Who knows? If she really sees that you are truly sorry and willing to make amends, she may be willing to give it another go!

      I know of a friend with 3 kids , whose husband did the same to her. He moved out to live with the other woman, and they planned to sell the house. However , he soon saw this other woman's true colours in comparison to his wife's and came back truly repentant. It took about a year to woo his wife before they got back together. They both went for Christian counselling together and this helped!

      You must be very patient as the wound are usually very deep!

      In my friends case, although they are back together, she is still on medication for depression.

      Above all pray to God to help you heal your home, as he is able!

      I wish you the best!

    • profile image

      michael 3 years ago

      This happened to me,i cheated on my wife & lost completely everything & have never recovered.It was the worst mistake of my life & sadly I can never get back what i had.My whole world is gone.I loved my wife & my 3 children so much but made a terrible decision that i can never change.This was on April 1st 2010 & yes what a FOOL i was.

    • tracy imevbore profile image
      Author

      tracy imevbore 5 years ago from england

      i agree, that's why it is not worth it! it causes so much pain to everyone concerned.

    • davenstan profile image

      Katina Davenport 5 years ago

      It is hard to be in a marriage where your spouse is cheating. My first marriage was like that. When someone breaks their vows it puts them in a position to reap what they have sowed. I can totally relate to this.