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Looking for Love
Looking for love, knowing Love
The story that is love begins within you. It begins with the gift of life. The journey that is love is affected by relationships and events that unfold along the way.
Our childhood is the foundation to the story and the journey, but we all have the opportunity and power to revise the story later or determine how it ends.
Childhood is the foundation because this is where the fairy tale to all our lives begins or not. This is where love begins to blossom or not. This is where the fairy tale begins and belongs because as children we all need and look for or expect some love.
The need and expectation follows us into our adult lives but a different kind of expectation and of a different nature, according to our expectations and desires. The quest for a happy ending to the fairy tale continues.
Not everyone has the capacity to love and not everyone can be loved because they do not allow themselves to be loved. Not even in the relationship that is parenthood or marriage can love be reflected, if the capacity to love or the ability to be loved is absent.
The first question that you have to ask yourself is do you have the capacity to love and be loved. If you do not have the capacity to love and you know that you do not, then you have to stop calling what you are looking for love and call it something else. Call it companionship, call it security or even a money bag or punching bag, but not love.
If you do have the capacity to love and to be loved, the question for you, is will you recognize love if it comes knocking on your door and stares you in the face. Are you open to love or do you have a list of what love looks like? It raises other questions also: How do you recognize love along the way, when you see it? Can you recognize love?
There is of course love and there is of course lust and many things in between that could easily be mistaken for love. There is reality and there is fantasy. There is reality tv and there is reality. There is compatibility and there is incompatibility Sometimes you can find love in the most unusual places or it comes from an unexpected source but love needs you to be realistic about it and requires some compatibility.
The problem to love may actually lie in the looking for love. It may be better to let love find you and know that love has found you. The story of true love begins with love finding us as children. It finds us as children, if we are the products or off springs of true love. As we grow up, we lose true love and then start looking for it again. Even as adults love finds us, we take it for granted, lose it and start looking again and sometimes in the wrong places or from the wrong people.
It does not matter how love finds you but when it does, try to keep it. Stop looking for love if true love has already found you. If love finds you and you lose it, let love find you again, rather than looking too hard for it. Look too hard and you might find something that looks like love but is not really love or someone you want to love you but cannot love you the way that you expect to be loved.
If you look into the eyes of another, you will know whether love lies in their heart for you or not. The eyes never lie but if you cannot see it in their eyes, listen to what they say and how they say it when they speak to you or of you. If you cannot find it in their eyes or hear it to their voice, look to their body language and to their actions, to see if you can find love there.
If you cannot find it in these places, either it is buried very deep or belongs to somewhere and someone else or there is simply no love to give or receive.
One of the most direct ways of knowing is of course for someone else to tell you the words `I love you’ but circumstances may not always permit those words and so you must follow the signs. You must listen to your heart and your instincts. Your heart always knows, even though it sometimes likes to pretend that it does not.
If there was once love between you and someone and they can no longer utter those sacred words or even give you a hug, then you have to presume that love is lost or never truly existed in the first place.
It is how we know the true love of children and how they know true love from others, including their parents. Love cannot easily disguise itself and so love is known. It is also difficult to pretend to love anyone and so the untrue likeness of love is also known.
Let your heart be your guide and not the notion of perfect love, for perfect love comes only from a divine source and next to that source, between parent and child or children. Give and receive with an open heart and mind and when the time comes to let go, let go, so that love may have the opportunity to find you again.
Jason.U for Spreadpositivty