Love or Infatuation
The Dangerous Myth of "The One"
The Difference Between Love and Infatuation
Are you in love with someone or is it merely infatuation? Before you act out on your feelings, it is a good idea to learn the difference between these two.
If you have some feelings of attraction for someone, your feelings ultimately boil down to either infatuation or love. It is very easy to confuse these two emotions because they have various similarities during the early parts of a romantic relationship.
Learn to Discern
As the relationship goes on however, the difference between infatuation and love become much clearer. If you would like to ascertain whether you are really in love with someone or if you are just infatuated with this person, here are some tips to help you out:
- Do your research: Learn how love actually works in human relationships and what makes people fall in love and learn what makes it different from infatuation. Use this information to help you decide whether you are really in love or not.
- Analyze what is happening around you: Don’t be blind to reality. If you can, try to document and write down in concrete detail exactly how you feel when you are around the person that you are apparently in love with.
- Condense what you have written in the previous tip into a small table of feelings. Classify each feeling according to the emotion that you can most closely associate them with – either infatuation or love.
- Ask someone else: Preferably, this person should be an uninterested third-party who has spent some degree of time observing you casually. Furthermore, try to gather as many opinions as you can and don’t be afraid to ask your friends directly whether they think you are in love with this person or not
- Learn from movies and literature: While you should not treat works of fiction as documentary evidence of how love works, you can get an idea of how to distinguish between love and infatuation from them.
Love grows while infatuation fades over time
While both feelings are related to attraction, the biggest difference between infatuation and love is that infatuation fades and begins to grow weaker over time while real love can only grow stronger as time passes even if it seems weak at first. Furthermore, even if you are sure that you are in love, you should not take this as a guarantee that your relationship will actually work out. Regardless of what your true feelings might be, you will still need to work and perhaps even make some compromises if you want the relationship to work.