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Mature cougars dating

Updated on July 9, 2013

What is a “Cougar”?

Last weekend I was discussing with my friend the topic of “Cougar women”, who are they, what is cougar? Because it seems a popular subject nowadays, I hear this term more and more these days. So I started my investigation of its definition and use.

Definition from Urban dictionary:


An older woman who frequents clubs in order to score with a much younger man. The cougar can be anyone from an overly surgically altered wind tunnel victim, to an absolute sad and bloated old horn meister, to a real hottie or milf. Cougars are gaining in popularity - particularly the true hotties - as young men find not only a sexual high, but many times a chick with her shit together.


A 35+ year old female who is on the "hunt" for a much younger, energetic, willing-to-do-anything male. The cougar can frequently be seen in a padded bra, cleavage exposed, propped up against a swanky bar in San Francisco (or other cities)waiting, watching, calculating; gearing up to sink her claws into an innocent young and strapping buck who happens to cross her path. "Man is cougar's number one prey".


Hot and sexy older woman, usually in her 40s or 50s, single or married, who is sick of her same-age counterparts which are usually hairless, have big guts, who only talk about their insurance premiums and have the TV remote control attached to their hands. Cougars are attractive, in their sexual prime, who know what they want and aren't afraid to go after it. BIG misconception is that they dress cheap, wear hot pink nail polish, animal skin prints and are not-so-attractive old-looking hags with bleached hair (Yeah those women exist, but they are NOT cougars). True cougars are classy, beautiful creatures who have made their successes on their own, have real brains, usually with expensive cars/homes, and are real head turners. Cougars seek younger men, and don't have to sneak up and attack...they know their younger mates are eager to get an experienced woman who won't ask if they'll call them the next day. Being a cougar is a positive thing.

While searching for the term “Cougar”, I found another term related to the subject it's “Puma”.

Definition from Urban dictionary:


A woman in her sexual prime between the ages of 30-39 who prefers to date younger men. The term "puma" does not apply to women before their 30s, and should never be confused with the titles "Cougar" (ages 40-49) and "Jaguar" (ages 50+).

Could You Have a "Cougar" Relationship?

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As you can see, mature woman who is involved in amorous relationship with a younger man called “cougar”.

Some cougar women are less interested in a relationship than of the fact that they are appealing to younger men who are twice younger than they are.

I do understand the nature of cougar women, women become more confident over 40, know what they want in life, know how to behave to seduce a man, become sexually active and willing to experiment, but having love affaire with a man who is young enough to be their son, that's too much.

Some people consider cougar women over 40 as desperate women, some think they are out of common sense, others consider “cougars as Vamp women”.

I wonder do men find “cougars” sexy, attractive? Would they prefer to date a cougar or an ordinary woman?

Celebrity Cougars

Click thumbnail to view full-size
Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher (15 years)Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins (12 years)Barbara Hershey and Naveen Andrews (21 years)Jennifer Lopez and Casper Smart ( 18 years)Kim Catrall  and Alan Wyse (28 years)Madonna and Brahim Zabat ( 25 years )Eva Longoria and Mark Sanchez (12 years )
Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher (15 years)
Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher (15 years)
Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins (12 years)
Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins (12 years)
Barbara Hershey and Naveen Andrews (21 years)
Barbara Hershey and Naveen Andrews (21 years)
Jennifer Lopez and Casper Smart ( 18 years)
Jennifer Lopez and Casper Smart ( 18 years)
Kim Catrall  and Alan Wyse (28 years)
Kim Catrall and Alan Wyse (28 years)
Madonna and Brahim Zabat ( 25 years )
Madonna and Brahim Zabat ( 25 years )
Eva Longoria and Mark Sanchez (12 years )
Eva Longoria and Mark Sanchez (12 years )

To sum up:

  1. A cougar must be 35+ year old not younger because younger women called Puma.
  2. A cougar dates men at least 10 years younger than her age.
  3. She is looking for sexual relationship with younger men, love to spend money on her toyboy.

How to spot a Cougar

Defining the Woman’s age

In this case age is a huge indicator, most often cougars are women in their 40s and older, some consider cougars from the age of 35+. It's not quite easy sometimes to define a woman's age, pay attention to physical changes that women can't hide hands, neck, fine lines around the eyes or mouth could be signal that your lady is under 35 years old.

Evaluate her fashion

Cougar women usually wear expensive designer clothes or wearing cloths not fitting their ages, tiny short dresses.


Cougars prefer intense make up, to cover age marks wrinkles, using heavy foundation, powder, lip gloss, chick rouge.

Determine her financial status

Dressed with chick and style, drinking expensive alcohol or cocktails, wearing jewelry, owning an expensive vehicle, fit and tanned.

Remember, cougar women over 40 are less likely to be interested in a long term relationship or having a family, they are interested in amorous relationship with younger guys, often in one night stands.

Not all women want to date a younger men, there are men and women who are looking for serious relationship, a soul mate, a life partner.


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    • Perspycacious profile image

      Demas W Jasper 2 years ago from Today's America and The World Beyond

      There seems little loyalty involved and attempts to relive an earlier age and level of activity, a search for a false reality. Seems somehow sad to me.

    • kenneth avery profile image

      Kenneth Avery 3 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama

      Great read! Interesting, honest, and thought-provoking. Voted up and all the way.

      Keep up the great work.

    • savvydating profile image

      Yves 4 years ago

      Technically, I suppose I was a cougar due to my age (at the time). However, I didn't wear heavy make-up or super expensive clothes, nor was I "on the hunt." I just kept meeting younger men, in person... so I dated them because they were attractive and intelligent. I liked them and they liked me. They even paid for dinner, and yes, they did have sex appeal. Lots of it. It was great. I recommend the cougar lifestyle highly. I might even consider doing the jaguar thing one day.

      Lovely article. It brought back very pleasant memories. ;)

      Up, interesting.

    • RealityTalk profile image

      RealityTalk 4 years ago from Planet Earth

      Interesting article. When I was in my teens & early twenties I came across a number of both Pumas & Cougars. I did not know that's what they were called at the time. I just thought of them as hot women in their late twenties or early thirties or my friends (girl or male) mom. At my young age, I thought it was cool & I dabbled somewhat - never with a friend's mom though. They did know sex, were hot for it and were forthright about it.

      Now as a 56 year old married man with a teenage son, cougar has taken on a new meaning. While it seemed cool when I was 17 to be having sex with some hot older woman, I find myself panicking at the thought of my 17 year old son being hit on by some older woman. Like father like son I have seen the signs by a couple of older woman in the presence of my son.

      Boy, age makes quite a difference in one's outlook on things.

    • kenneth avery profile image

      Kenneth Avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama

      Hi, Amanda,

      Love your style of writing. I loved your topic. Although you're far from a cougar, my thought is: it takes an attractive lady to write about an attractive lady.

      Voted up and all across.

    • d.william profile image

      d.william 4 years ago from Somewhere in the south

      Love this article.

      Older men have been dating younger women for decades and society thinks nothing of it. (other than calling them ''dirty old men'')

      When older women started publicly dating younger men it became a big deal. we don't hear older women being called "dirty old women".

      I wish i had had the opportunity to date older women when i was in my own prime, i certainly like the idea of the physical enjoyment without the expectations of wanting more.

      Of course now turning 70, my vision is now focused on the younger generation. I mean, really, who want to date an 'older' woman at my age?

    • AmandaJon profile image

      Amanda Jones 4 years ago

      Thanks a lot Dora, I'm glad you find this hub interesting.

    • AmandaJon profile image

      Amanda Jones 4 years ago

      Thank you DDE I appreciate your comment.

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Weithers 4 years ago from The Caribbean

      Thanks for the lesson on cougars. I hope that I don't know any. Good information!

    • DDE profile image

      Devika Primić 4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Awesome photos and an interesting guide to mature cougars dating, informative and useful

    • AmandaJon profile image

      Amanda Jones 4 years ago

      Thaks jaydene for your comment, I feel the same, relationship are more important than mindless sex.

    • AmandaJon profile image

      Amanda Jones 4 years ago

      Thaks Rose, I'm glad you loved this hub. You are right for experienced woman it's much easier to "snag" a younger guy.

    • rose-the planner profile image

      rose-the planner 4 years ago from Toronto, Ontario-Canada

      I just loved this! It was informative and entertaining. There are many cougars out there nowadays. Women tend to look so much younger today anyway and I think it is so much easier to "snag"a younger guy. Great article! (Voted Up) -Rose

    • jaydene profile image

      jaydene 4 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

      No I have no interest in this type of thing.

      unless of course the man is very rich, young, can go for hours and can afford me, ha ha

      All i have to do is think back to when i was younger.

      the sex racket does not interest me at all, I am more into real relationships now. :)

    • tomy101 profile image

      Christopher Hyer 4 years ago from Midland, Texas

      Wow, another great article from you. Very impressive, I know about this term Cougar and though I do not go to bars, did not really know that this was going on so much. Pretty intense how the sexes have changed. Very good article and informative, as all your articles tend to be. Sex is great and sexuality is interesting. Thank You