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Quiz: Am I Really In Love?

Updated on November 16, 2014

Is it really love? Take our quiz!

Millions of people want to know if there is a way to tell if they are really in love.

The standard issue reply is: "Don't worry, you'll know when it hits you." However, the standard advice really isn't true. Many people-especially young people-have a great deal of difficulty differentiating mere infatuation from real love.

Yet knowing how to differentiate false love from the real thing can mean the difference between happiness and heartache.

The following quiz is based both on the advice of experts and age-old wisdom in order to help you come to a fuller understanding of this mysterious emotion. Its aim is to help you answer one simple question: "Is it really love?"

Choose "Yes" if you have a definite opinion about the answer. If there is any doubt in your mind, choose "No."

Take the Quiz!

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Find Out More - Love and relationship books to expand your knowledge

Answers (Don't Peek!)

Take the quiz directly above, then look at the answers below to find out if you're really in love. It will be more fun (and informative) that way.

sudden love
sudden love

1. Did your feeling of love seem to come "out of the blue?"

True love does not occur suddenly. When someone says "it was love at first sight," or that they and their significant other instantly fell in love, what they really mean is that the other person fit some kind of idealized conception they held. Most of us have a mental image of the perfect mate whether we realize it or not. Therefore, when we see somebody who fits this image, we are attracted, but this is not the same thing as love. That may or may not develop later.

2. Would you become intensely jealous if someone made a play for your significant other?

Feelings of jealousy are not an indication of true love. This is one of the most common mistakes young people make. Some think that the stronger the jealousy, the greater the love, but this is really a sign of possessiveness, not true love. Psychologists say that jealousy can mask underlying feelings of insecurity which result in an overwhelming need to be loved. Therefore, jealousy is not a sign of true love.

3. When the two of you aren't together, do you find yourself wistfully longing for your significant other?

Are you hardly able to think about anything else?

Daydreaming, pining and obsessive thoughts of one's partner are not a sign of true love. True love is focused on the other person, with one's greatest concern being his or her happiness and welfare. In contrast, infatuation is self centered. The wistful one is absorbed in his or her own unhappiness at being separated from the other, even for a short time, to the point of daydreaming about them. Such a person is in love with the idea of love, not with the other person.

4. If your love interest went on a trip and sent you love letters, would you show these around to your friends?

Love is a personal bond between two people. If one party shares intimate details of a relationship with others, then it probably isn't true love; it is a play for prestige with one's peers and an attempt to seem important to others.

5. Do you feel more in love when the two of you are together then when you are alone?

Love does not decrease while two partners are separated from one another. If you feel more in love with someone when the two of you are together, chances are that your emotions are being influenced by his or her charming personality or just the excitement of being around them. When not influenced by such factors, doubts about the relationship can creep up from the subconscious. This can be an indication that the love is superficial.

i love you sweetheart
i love you sweetheart

6. Would you seriously describe your sweetheart is just about the most perfect person in the world?

Love is not really blind-at least not to the faults of one's significant other. Someone who is truly in love knows and understands the other persons faults, weaknesses and shortcomings, but is able to overlook these failings. One who is merely infatuated has more of a tendency to see the object of one's affections as perfect.

7. Do you worry about how you come across to your significant other?

Are you concerned about always looking your best around them, and do you put a lot of effort into what you say and how you act around them?

Love does not cause two people to be ill at ease with one another. If you are extremely concerned about making a good impression on another person, chances are that the relationship has not reached the stage of true love. When you not only love but you know that you are loved in return, then you feel comfortable, relaxed and at ease in the presence of another person.

unhappy with life
unhappy with life

8 If you still live at home with your parents, are you fairly unhappy with your home life?

An unhappy home life can make you more inclined to feel you are in love. Too many people marry when all they really want to do is escape the overbearing presence of their parents. A young girl who has problems with her parents may see a young man as a knight in shining armor who will “rescue” her. She’s not truly in love, she just wants out of the situation.

9. Are you aware of your sweetheart's opinions about money and children?

Love can not always be perched on Cloud Nine. There are practical considerations as well. Two of the most important factors in determining the success of a marriage are money and children. A relationship has the best chance of success when two partners know each other's views on these matters and find them compatible. Otherwise, disagreements can lead to a breakup. If the couple hasn't talked these issues out, chances are the relationship has never reached the stage of true love.

10. It is commonly agreed that the best partners share similar interests, but how about similar complaints?

Do you and your love interest both have the same gripes about your home life, parents, school and other aspects of your lives?

Being companions in heartache is not the same as being in love. Those in a marriage should be able to share misfortunes, but that in itself does not make for love. All too often, young people think they are in love simply because they have found some unfortunate situation to unite against.

Why the answers mean what they mean.

Okay, We'll be honest with you: this was somewhat of a trick quiz, and if you thought "yes" answers revealed true love, you were mistaken! The "no" answers really indicate if your head is screwed on straight about love in almost every case, except for Question #9, the one about money and children. Check our explanations above for the reasons why.


We're still working on and refining the scoring system, but you get 10 points for each no answer, and 0 for each yes except for Question #9. If your score was between 70 and 100, it could be the real thing, but if the score is between 50 and 60 there is some doubt. Even if the score is only 40 or less, it could still grow into real love, but don't mistake it for the real thing quite yet.

How To Succeed In Love

You should know what you want and don't want in the opposite sex. Make a list of "likes" and "don't likes" and narrow it down to the top five or ten in each category to keep it from being too restrictive.

Did you take the quiz? How did you do? Did you learn something? We're sure you did. Share your comments here!

Comments - How did you do? Did you agree with this quiz? Disagree? Tell us why!

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    • williamslaw profile image

      williamslaw 3 years ago

      Good lens. I hope the young ones find it useful.

    • NoProblemmo profile image

      NoProblemmo 4 years ago

      Nice quiz!

    • profile image

      kriskappa 4 years ago

      Nice lens! Thanks!

    • TimothyArends profile image

      Timothy Arends 4 years ago from Chicago area

      @anonymous: Good points! You might want to check out my other quizzes. Fore established relationships particularly, check out

    • profile image

      tahirmahmood 4 years ago


    • profile image

      anonymous 4 years ago

      I think the quiz is great for someone to realise and distinguish the difference between real love and "fake love", for lack of a better term. But, it could also factor in whether a person is really "in love" as the title suggests or if they merely just love someone, like a friend or sibling. Surely this difference needs to be established. Also, seems to be directed to young "love" what about "old love". What if you just no longer love someone. How would the results differ then?

    • profile image

      kelvinbierhuizen 4 years ago

      awesome quiz :)

    • profile image

      achivevery 4 years ago

      not all

    • NibsyNell profile image

      NibsyNell 4 years ago

      I like your point about jealousy.

    • profile image

      anonymous 4 years ago

      The most common source of problems in marriages is that the couple misinterpreted their mutual feelings of attraction as love. This normally results in the couple trying to keep up appearances after about 5 years, and wondering where the love went.

      It is important to know that attraction is an emotional feeling that may fade, while love is a promise that has little to do with attraction. If you are thinking of getting married, then please read "Attraction is a feeling. Love is a promise." by Grenville Phillips, president of Walbrent College.

    • profile image

      anonymous 4 years ago

      I learned too much. I've been married for 30 years, we both just lost our jobs. I don't have a penny to my name. We have a 22 yr old daughter in college and have been uptight about having to pay her tuition while we are retired. I do love him.

    • JennyRowling profile image

      Jenny Rowling 4 years ago from London, UK

      I liked it, I agree with most things.

    • profile image

      anonymous 4 years ago

      @anonymous: I agree.

    • profile image

      anonymous 4 years ago

      Shitty quiz. Already lots of bs ive heard, a lot of which isn't based in reality. Nice black and white perspective on love. Its hilariously idiotic but worth taking for the sake of boredom. Pretty much sums it up.

    • junkcat profile image

      junkcat 4 years ago

      Thanks for the interesting quiz

    • profile image

      ConvenientCalendar 4 years ago

      Love the quiz! Check out my relationship test if you get a chance!

    • chuckholmes301 profile image

      chuckholmes301 5 years ago

      Great lens and quiz. Thanks.

    • TimothyArends profile image

      Timothy Arends 5 years ago from Chicago area

      @anonymous: Sorry you didn't like it Damien. If you offered more specific criticisms it could possibly help me make it better. In the meantime, you might prefer one of the other quizzes I offer on love instead? Love is a multi-faceted emotion and so one quiz can't fully explore all aspects of it.

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      ...this quiz is so fucked up. All the ambiguity, it's one-sided, the concept is off... It's just not possible to even make a decent quiz about this by using multiple choice. Fools the lot of you who thought this quiz was anything.

    • profile image

      SteppingRasor 5 years ago

      Oh boy, I don't think so.

    • profile image

      racingdatabase 5 years ago

      All I can say is, you better not share my results with my wife (joke! :-))

    • loopylooh profile image

      loopylooh 5 years ago

      I got 70% this is more than i thought i'd get

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      i don't think iam ..........

    • Allison Whitehead profile image

      Allison Whitehead 5 years ago

      Interesting quiz! Good lens too :)

    • earthybirthymum profile image

      earthybirthymum 5 years ago from Ontario, Canada

      Mine was 90%... I'm in love :)

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago


    • profile image

      Deadpool 5 years ago

      great lens

    • cody everette profile image

      cody everette 5 years ago

      Good stuff! I got most of them right, but missed the jealously one...that's a good catch.

    • TimothyArends profile image

      Timothy Arends 5 years ago from Chicago area

      @DeboraR: Thanks...and congratulations!

    • DeboraR profile image

      DeboraR 5 years ago

      Great lens! Every person who thinks they're in love needs to take this quiz. You've stated so many things I've said myself over the years. For instance, "love at first sight", it's more of a lust because love is not instantaneous. I've been married to the love of my life for going on 33 yrs. Our love for each other has grown and developed as we've overcome circumstances together, working with each other, not against each other. Compromise is a 'give a little-take a little' that couples don't want to accept these days. Another thing you stated in your lens is true love will help you to overlook a lot of imperfections and acknowledge no human is perfect. The female gender is always looking for Mr. Perfect, instead they should be looking for Mr. Right. I was richly blessed to have found mine years ago.

    • bisersmbg lm profile image

      bisersmbg lm 5 years ago

      this is the best lens that I had ever read (this is not a joke sir) and wish you a marry christmas and happy new year and I hope to see you in the area in the USA why not despite I am out of work now!?

    • idreesfarooq lm profile image

      idreesfarooq lm 5 years ago

      After taking your quiz, i think i am in love :)

    • kavalonthatsme profile image

      kavalonthatsme 5 years ago

      Nice lens.

    • katrinakaifg profile image

      katrinakaifg 5 years ago

      nice..thanks for information!

    • profile image

      mecheshier 5 years ago

      Great questions. Thanks

    • happy-birthday profile image

      Birthday Wishes 5 years ago from Here

      Very good quiz and I did pretty good! Thanks a lot for sharing.

    • profile image

      Short_n_Sweet 5 years ago

      I love my sweetheart!!

      It doesn't depend on this quiz...

    • SandyMertens profile image

      Sandy Mertens 5 years ago from Frozen Tundra

      Some of these I am not sure there really was a right or wrong answer. But I scored 8 out of 10.

    • profile image

      FashionMommy 5 years ago

      7/10, does this mean i passed? :D

    • profile image

      myspace9 5 years ago

      Very nice lens.

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago


    • sageinacage lm profile image

      sageinacage lm 5 years ago

      Great quiz.

    • profile image

      atsikplornu1 5 years ago

      Fun quiz.!!!

    • Voltarbear profile image

      Voltarbear 5 years ago

      Fun quiz, definitely.

      Most points have truth to them, but I disagree with a couple. For instance, point 8. If someone has a bad home life then their love is possibly untrue, and they get deducted points on that basis? I don't think that's very valid.

      Otherwise, I had lots of fun, and found the points very wise and informative. A squidlike and kudos for you!

      If you like, I'd like to invite you to check out my lens on the personality system of Enneagram. I'd be doing some things related to love, hooking it in to the concept of Enneagram... and looking at your assortment of lenses and their common topic, I'd love to have a few fun discussions with you.

    • Melissa Miotke profile image

      Melissa Miotke 5 years ago from Arizona

      Fun quiz.

    • Riesling profile image

      Riesling 5 years ago

      Interesting lens, thanks for sharing.

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      sorry for the bad spelling! spilt cappuccino on my keyboard!

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      how silly, if the questions was to answered as whether i believe this or that is a sign of true ove my answers would have been very differet, bt i answers from what i was asked and how i feel.

      as an example, even if a person is jealous it does not mean the person believes that being jelous is a sign of true love!!!!

      if you and your partners have the same problems it is very possible you do if you live does not mean you go around believing this means you're in love!!!!

      if you asked me * do you have the same problems?* i would have to be truthful and say *yes*, but if you aske me *do you believe that by sharing the same problems as your partner that this means you are in love?* i would answer *no!what kind of stupid question is that!*

    • profile image

      GracoNautilus3-in-1CarSeat 5 years ago

      Thank you for sharing this great informative lens my squidoo friend. Visit my and thank you again.

    • MissRubyStars profile image

      MissRubyStars 5 years ago


    • profile image

      TheBeautifulLife 5 years ago

      Very bad...:( very bad...5 of 10...It's this good? :) Thank you for sharing this lens with us...

    • swatisingh lm profile image

      swatisingh lm 5 years ago

      great work.....its worked...

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      is it really true

    • profile image

      wendybrausch 5 years ago

      Just met a new guys a few weeks ago - seems that we're in love then :o)

    • VspaBotanicals profile image

      VspaBotanicals 5 years ago

      I'm happy with my score. Thanks for lens, it was fun.

    • ae dc profile image

      ae dc 5 years ago

      i find this mostly true! thank you

    • TimothyArends profile image

      Timothy Arends 5 years ago from Chicago area

      Congratulations! This quiz is based on the opinions of experts, but of course there are always exceptions.

    • Jan 1980 profile image

      Jan 1980 5 years ago

      From your quiz it say that i am not in love, but i am happy with my wife and we are in love :).Interesting lens

    • TimothyArends profile image

      Timothy Arends 5 years ago from Chicago area

      @JakeVandenhoff LM: Thanks for the reply. You might also like some of my other quizzes listed below, since they approach love from a different perspective.

    • JakeVandenhoff LM profile image

      JakeVandenhoff LM 5 years ago

      This is an interesting quiz. I wouldn't say that I agree with your reasoning here, but it was definitely cool to read an alternative point of view, keep up the good work!

    • WilliamPower profile image

      WilliamPower 6 years ago

      We are really in love.