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Reasons to Support Gay Marriage in the United States

Updated on February 4, 2014
Why should you support gay marriage?
Why should you support gay marriage? | Source

This is a Political Opinion Piece on Gay Marriage

Before I begin to explain my stance on the issues of gay marriage and the proposed bans on gay marriage, I wish to clarify that these are only my opinions. I've attempted in as much as possible to maintain some decorum with my feelings on this issue and to use media only to express facts and not the varied opinions of a multitude of individuals.

I would have liked to include some video on this page, but everything I found was too much related to the opinions of an individual other than myself, and the point of this is for me to illustrate the reasons why I believe that a ban on gay marriage would be bad for America.

Please understand that you should read this article with an open mind and take it with a grain of salt. This page is filled with my opinion, coupled with facts found around the Internet.

Mostly the point of this piece is to illustrate why a far-right conservative such as myself would support gay marriage.

If you've read this far, please keep going. I'll be sharing enough personal information with you throughout this page that by the end it should be clear that I am both a Tea Party supporter and a conservative Christian.

Why a Conservative Supports Gay Marriage in the United States

Overall, this entire article is about the reasons that I, as a freedom-loving, capitalist, small-government conservative American woman, supports gay marriage. It cannot be emphasized enough that I am a tea-party supporter, that I believe in limitations on government, and that I am a Christian.

Are you surprised that support gay marriage? You shouldn't be, and here's why.

Do you believe that all humans are equal to one another, regardless of race, gender, sexual preference or physical ability?

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Reason #1: Support Marriage Equality Because All Humans are Created Equal

I believe that all humans were created equal to one another, regardless of their race, gender, or sexual orientation. While I disagree with the standpoint that some of my family and friends have taken -- that animals are also equal to humans -- I believe that we were all made to be equal with one another. Our differences don't make us separate or inequal to one another: They only make us unique. Just as I have auburn hair and blue eyes and this makes me unique from my best friend, who has dark brown hair and green eyes, our gender, race, and sexual preference differences just mean that no two people are alike.

Clearly this is a personal perspective. I'm quite certain that regardless of political or religious affiliation, there are few people in the world who would make the statement that homosexuals (or bisexuals or pansexuals) aren't equal to heterosexuals -- it would be a dangerous assumption to make in today's society.

Please don't be afraid to vote in the poll to the right. It's entirely anonymous and nobody's keeping track of who you are to hunt you down for a hate crime. My readers and I are genuinely curious about what you think.

Do you believe that the archaic sodomy laws on the books are beneficial to American society?

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Marriage Equality is good for America. I'll explain why.
Marriage Equality is good for America. I'll explain why. | Source

Reason #2: Banning Gay Marriage Doesn't Outlaw Homosexuality

I'll admit: I can understand why a person, for religious reasons, would believe in the innate wrongness of homosexuality. If a religious doctrine states that homosexuality is a sin or that it is causing the downfall of the western culture, it's no wonder there are people who believe that homosexuality itself should be banned in America.

Fortunately, you can't ban homosexuality. Nothing you can do is going to stop people from being gay. You can force them back into the closet, and you can prevent them from committing acts of public flamboyancy (in theory, anyway), but you cannot stop someone from being attracted to members of their own gender.

A ban on gay marriage won't stop gay people from being gay: It's only going to create tension, prevent loving couples from getting married, and it's going to cause people to go back into the closet. Closeted gays suffer an increased risk of depression and suicide.

Do you support state sovereignty?

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Reason #3: Banning Gay Marriage Undermines State Sovereignty

The 10th Amendment to the Constitution states:

"The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the states, are reserved to the states respectively, or to the people."

This is known as "state sovereignty" and it means that the states have the power to govern themselves under the broader rule of the federal government. States must follow federal laws and local governments must follow state laws.

This is the very thing that makes this country "The United States." Each state has the right and ability to determine its own laws under the blanket of protection provided by the U.S. Constitution. A federal ban on gay marriage will limit the rights of the states to legislate gay marriage at the state level, giving the federal government more power over the people and the state governments less power.

As the Constitution is written, each state has the right to decide whether or not to ban gay marriage. As the law exists right now, a ban on gay marriage changes nothing. Whether you support the legalization of homosexual marriage or not, you should oppose a ban for this reason. Liberal or Conservative, Democrat or Republican, this issue affects all of us.

If conservatives support limited federal government, they should likewise oppose a federal ban on gay marriage.

Facts about Gay Marriage Infographic
Facts about Gay Marriage Infographic | Source

Does giving gay people the right to marry hurt traditional married couples?

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Reason #4: A Ban on Gay Marriage Hurts Couples

We've all heard both sides of this argument: That gay marriage undermines traditional marriage and that a ban on gay marriage hurts gay couples.

Here's the question that I'd like to have answered (there's a poll for this to the right): How does gay marriage hurt straight couples? I understand that some people believe that gays are more likely to divorce than straight people, and I have a good grasp of the concerns that some among the religious right have with gay couples adopting or having children of their own. I've even heard that gay marriage is what leads to the slippery slope of legalized polygamy (why not?) and people wanting to marry their television sets.

I also happen to believe that who (or what) you marry is your business and your business alone.

A ban on gay marriage harms gay couples and therefore does more harm than it does good. Is this argument worth the depression that it causes?

Do you believe that marriage should be an individual freedom?

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Reason #5: A Ban on Gay Marriage Undermines Individual Freedoms

As an American, I believe that individual freedom is the cornerstone of our republic. Our society has been built on the idea that each person is free to make his or her own choices and to build a life the way that he or she chooses. Few decisions are greater in this life than deciding who you will spend the rest of your life with. Should it matter if you're gay, straight, bisexual, pansexual or asexual?

Arguably gays would still have the right to civil unions and to cohabit with one another, but if this is the argument that some people make, then isn't "marriage" just a word that we're attaching to this thing that we do when we choose to live with one another?

It should be my inherent right to make decisions for myself and my family without the government getting in the way of those decisions. Just as I believe that I should be allowed to order a Big Mac at McDonalds if I want to, I also believe that I should have a choice in who I marry, and that my marriage -- regardless of the gender of my spouse -- should be recognized equally under the law regardless of whether it is "straight" or "gay."

Marriage Equality Timeline Infographic
Marriage Equality Timeline Infographic | Source

Do you believe that marriage is a:

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Reason #6: Marriage is a Social Convention, Neither Religious nor Legal

While it's clear that the government has its hands in the marriage pot -- after all, government makes money from taxes and licensing fees! -- marriage has traditionally been a social issue and not a matter for religion or governments. Certainly each religion has its own policies regarding marriage, but religion is a teaching and an individual way of life. America was founded on the principle of religious liberty: No one religion should be allowed to dictate whether a couple should be permitted to get married or not.

A theocratic ban on gay marriage would be a mistake for a number of reasons, the most obvious of which is the fact that not everyone in the United States practices or adheres to a single religion.

I continue to support the idea that each religious body should be permitted to decide whether or not to perform homosexual marriages in their churches, synagogues, temples or mosques. No body should force a religious institution to practice something they believe to be wrong. However, I don't believe that a theocratic ban on homosexual marriage benefits the United States.

Should Gay Marriage be Banned?

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Should Gay Marriage be Banned?

Weigh in on the poll to the right with your opinion on whether or not gay marriage should be banned at the Federal or State level. Remember that these polls are entirely confidential (anonymous) and nobody is going to see who voted in what way. You are entitled to your opinion, and you can state your opinion in the comments, provided you're able to do so respectfully.

Do you identify as conservative or liberal?

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A Message for Conservatives and Republicans Regarding a Ban on Gay Marriage

Conservatives, I want you to think seriously about your stance on gay marriage. It matters to me on a personal level and if it didn't, I probably wouldn't have gone out of my way to write this article. As far as I'm concerned, a ban on gay marriage would be terrible for America, but many of you seem to disagree with me. My question for you is this: Why?

If you're conservative and in favor of state sovereignty, why do you support a federal ban on gay marriage? Shouldn't the states be free to decide?

If you're conservative and believe in limited federal government, why do you support a federal ban on gay marriage? Do you favor limited federal government except when it suits you?

If you're conservative and believe in individual liberties, why do you support a ban on gay marriage? Shouldn't individuals be permitted to decide who to marry?

A Note About Comments on This Article

I've moderated the comments on this article so that they don't become a free-for-all. Political debate is all well and good but too often these debates degenerate into name-calling and vitriol. That isn't the purpose of this article, and I will be deleting comments that I consider to be "mud slinging." Use reasoned arguments and speak intelligently to other people commenting on this page, or your comments will be deleted.

Please also note that I would greatly prefer it if religious argument was avoided in the comments. I fully understand the reasons that many Christians support a ban on gay marriage: You won't be educating me. I'm a Christian myself. This article isn't about the reasons why homosexuality is right or wrong for people: It's about why a ban on homosexuality would be bad for America.

If you're going to comment, please contribute to the discussion.

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    • jlpark profile image

      Jacqui 2 years ago from New Zealand

      Hmmm, the argument from Brad has been fine tuned a little and some of it I even agree with - if the issue is about 'marriage' as a term - remove it from all 'marriages', and make it so that all couples straight or gay have the same term, and no one has marriage. Now, I'm not sure that's exactly what Brad meant (as I think that the argument was to keep Marriage religious) - but that's what would work from his argument.

      Separate but equal, is not equal. A different 'agreement' between homosexual couples, to that of heterosexual couples does not make things equal - it seperates into two different categories that look similar, but as always happens in human nature - one is still given the "better" label. Marriage is "better" than whatever term they use for homosexual marriage type thing.

      Homosexuality, however, will continue, whether gay people get married or not. It's not the gay people having gay babies - it's straight people. For example, I am one of 8 girls. I have straight siblings, straight parents, straight cousins, almost all of my friends are straight. I should be straighter than a ruler....NOPE - gayer than a rainbow. So, homosexuality will survive, just as it always has, because it's the straight people having gay babies.

      I live in a country with Marriage Equality, and have changed my Civil Union (all that was available at the time) to Marriage on the last anniversary we had. And if anyone cared, our daughter was born after we were married - so completely in wedlock. My wife is listed with me on her birth certificate. Marriage equality makes it a world we dreamed of bringing up our children in. I look forward to the day that she looks shocked that we weren't allowed to marry...much in the same way that people now look on Segregation and the hoohaa over Inter-Racial Marriage.

      It's not just about the rights of marriage (in the States it is different, I understand, as in NZ we have visitation rights in hospitals regardless of who the person is...if we know them, we are welcome to visit...), though I gather there are a lot of them in the US ONLY attached to marriage. Its about being treated as equal citizens, in the country of our birth, the country we fight to protect, pay taxes in, obey laws in. It's about our children being able to rely on us both in times of need - in hospital.

      Two genders are ONLY required for procreation...and not all heterosexual couples want, or can, do so. Lesbians and gay men can procreate (not necessarily together...I re-read that!), it just takes a little more planning and a bit more work.....but NONE of our children are conceived by accident...solving the problems of unwanted children.

      Thank you for sharing this hub, it was well written, researched, and interesting coming from someone who's political and religious beliefs don't always see eye to eye with the LGBT people on such topics (at least when other people of said political and religious beliefs go on about it!).

      THANK YOU

    • profile image

      brad masters 3 years ago

      Interesting but not convincing

      There is a reason why humans have two genders. And no matter how people twist the 14th amendment you have to make allowances for the differences.

      Males and females differ not only in physiology, but in hormones. These differences are ingrained in our DNA. Homosexuality cannot survive because they can't procreate. They continue because of bisexuality, but they couldn't procreate without using the necessary compliment from the other gender.

      Gay marriage is not a solution for homosexuals.

      The solution would be to put marriage back into to religion where it belongs. Then replace marriage with a personal contract between two people. That contract would be explicit and it would cover all the aspects of the couples needs. The traditional marriage contract is not written with any specifics, while a personal couples contract would be written and very specific. It would also contain the necessary remedies for its dissolution.

      The divorce courts are inept to handle heterosexual divorces much less same sex. The reason is that the marriage contract is weak and there are no real clauses that indicate when there is a breach of the contract. The 1979 No Fault Divorce did away with the necessity of a breach.

      So the divorce court uses the family law to adjudicate child support, alimony, and community property, at least in California.

      Having a personal couple contract would be like having a will instead of dying intestate.So with the written contract, the court would adjudicate by the terms of the contract much like a prenup. The difference would be that this contract would also cover how you want to be taken care of by the other person. The over fifteen hundred things that the government attaches to beign married.

      The government should replace marriage with the personal couple contract and attach to it all that it does for marriage. Such as filing jointly on your taxes, health insurance coverage etc.

      The flaw with gay marriage is that many homosexuals, like heterosexuals don't want to get married.This is where the personal contract enables every couple to get the same rights as married people.

      But to make it work, the government needs to replace marriage with the personal contract. Every couple is equal through the commonality of the contract.