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Dating a Capricorn Man: What to Do When a Capricorn Pulls Away

Updated on January 17, 2016

What to Do When Your Capricorn Man Pulls Away

Are you in a relationship with a Capricorn man? If so, does he pull away, become distant, or disappear only to pop back into your life later (just when you've stopped caring)?

I'm not a man but I am a Capricorn, so I hope I can provide some help and advice on the intricacies of Capricorn behavior and provide a platform to share and discuss your Cappy man and his strange, yet alluring ways.

Why is My Capricorn Man So Distant?

So, what does it mean when a Capricorn pulls away? Does he just need space?

Capricorn men are the ultimate "lone wolves," and I would most definitely say that YES, they do need their space. So, does this mean that if your Capricorn man is pulling away, he's unhappy or upset? Not necessarily!

There are several things to consider. First, there may be some external stress that has absolutely nothing to do with you and which you may not be aware of.

Also, Capricorns tend to be focused on work. It usually will come first!

Another thing to remember is that Caps are very sensitive. If he's pulled away, could it be that his feelings were hurt? If you know you've hurt him, then be a straight shooter and sincerely apologize.

If he's pulled away after getting close to you, then just relax! Capricorns need a lot of time to think and reflect. This could be his way of mulling over his next step with you. If you want to make a relationship with a Capricorn work, you’re going to need a pretty big reservoir of patience.

Warning: Do NOT Chase a Capricorn Man!

When Your Capricorn Pulls Away, Let Him Chase You

So what should you do when your Capricorn has pulled away, and stopped texting, calling, or initiating?

  1. Give him some space. The worst thing you can do when he's pulled away is to keep asking him about it, texting, and calling him. Let him come to you. In the meantime, go about your life and keep as busy as possible. Find a new hobby, go out with friends, take salsa lessons, or do whatever you want to and have fun meeting new people.
  2. Don't respond immediately. When he does call or text you after he's disappeared (for more than a week!) do not, I repeat, DO NOT call or text him back right away. Wait a few days. After all, he's disappeared on you. By doing this, you are letting him know that there are repercussions for his bad behavior. This is bad behavior, no matter what lame excuse he gives you. And really, he knows what he did was wrong. Do not allow him back into your life as if nothing has happened.
  3. Stay calm. At the same time, do not get overly emotional or angry with him. You need to be cool and distant and not like you have been waiting around for his call. If you get angry or overly emotional, he will know that you are much more invested than he is. This may lead him to disappear all over again. Why? Because he thinks he can get away with it. After all, if you answered his call right away he realizes that while his bad behavior makes you crazy you still adore him and accept that behavior. Don't do it. You need to come across as aloof and as if it really doesn't matter very much to you that he's disappeared. You are, after all, a very busy woman with a busy life of her own.

What to Do When Your Capricorn Reappears

It's important to note that when he's popped right back into your life without a care in the world and providing a lame excuse as to why he went MIA for so long, he cannot expect for things to just pick up from where they left off. That's unfair for you. So what do you do?

  1. Be cordial, but cool. Do keep your guard up! Do not drop everything you are doing or rearrange your schedule just because he's come back. If you do this, you are setting yourself up for another disappearance in the near future.
  2. Decide what you want. This is ALSO the time to ask yourself if you really want to be in a relationship with a man who is hot and cold like this. Maybe once is forgivable, but after the second or third time of being MIA, it's a pattern and it will most likely be repeated.
  3. Set clear boundaries. Remember that he needs to be taught that you will NOT tolerate this type of behavior and disappearing is NOT okay.

If he never comes back, then you know he just wasn't that interested. It doesn't mean there is anything wrong with you, he just wasn't the right man for you and probably did not have what it took to be in a relationship with anyone! After all, you deserve a man who will stick by you through thick and thin and not a little boy who runs away at the drop of a hat.

Top Tips to Keep Your Capricorn Man Interested

  1. Stay very busy and don't be needy (needy/clingyness is a big mistake).
  2. Do NOT play games with this man (he will know when you are and will lose interest FAST).
  3. Be sincere, honest, and straightforward (he will appreciate it).
  4. Don't lay all your feelings for him on the table (let him feel like he's winning you over little by little).
  5. Have a life and friends of your own to enjoy (outside of your relationship with him). You will need them when he goes MIA.
  6. No matter how fast he moves at first, you need to slow it down. Delay being intimate for as long as possible!

What to Do When Your Capricorn Pulls Away

Is your Capricorn meant to be? Or a star-crossed lover?
Is your Capricorn meant to be? Or a star-crossed lover?

This is something that not just Capricorn men do but almost ALL men do. In a way, he could be testing you so don't buy into it.

If he has stopped texting, calling, or emailing, then YOU need to back off too. This will serve several purposes.

  1. You'll know where you stand. If you back off and never hear from him again, then he is just not interested so you can move on. He did you a favor and eliminated himself! If he comes back, then you know he's interested. This is why it's crucial that you back off when he does! When you do that, it gives him time to re-evaluate his position and then proceed to chase you.
  2. It'll throw him off his game. Your backing off (not calling, texting, nothing!) will make him realize that you are different. You're doing the opposite of what other women usually do!
  3. It denies him validation. Also, men will pull away to get reassurance of some kind to see where they stand with you. So guess what? When you go buck wild and start blowing up his phone and sending messages and complaining, you're validating him! He now knows that you really like him and are most likely more into him than he's into you. The allure and your mystery is gone.
  4. You'll keep your leverage. When you back off, he will become unsure of himself, wondering why you are not chasing him. He will realize that you are different and are not following him around like a puppy dog calling and texting him. All the other women gave him that validation, why aren’t you? He'll get curious and decide to call you up and see what you have going on.

That cool, calm exterior will pull him back in. He'll snap right back, just like a rubber band.

You Need to Be Very Patient with Him

Will Disappearing Capricorn Man Come Back?

If he really cares, he will come back around. Whether you decide to allow him back in your life is completely up to you. In the meantime, it's your job to enjoy yourself and have fun. Don't invest yourself too much into this man until he has made a real commitment to you and shown you how much he cares for you.

Keep in mind that a man who truly cares about you will NEVER leave you wondering where you stand with him. There will be no doubts in your mind. He will make you feel secure and loved. Why? Because he does not want to risk losing you.

Capricorn Traits

The Capricorn Man - A Guide for Women


Capricorns tend to be great people to plan a future with. They’re smart, hardworking, responsible, and disciplined. Very goal-oriented and capable of sacrificing short-term pleasure for long-term gain. Capricorns also tend to be a bit more traditional and conservative. Capricorns are often very career-oriented, focusing their early years on establishing a successful career and only then turning toward love and family. For them, financial security is a prerequisite to any long-term committed relationship.

They’re not huge social butterflies, preferring a smaller circle of more intimate acquaintances.

Capricorns also tend to be a bit sensitive. They don’t do well with teasing, and if you offend them you should own up to it and apologize at the earliest opportunity.

Other Capricorn qualities include: prudence, patience, and steadiness. These Capricorn qualities also have a darker side to them when taken too far, which can lead some Capricorns to become overly negative, suspicious, ruthless, and inflexible.

Capricorns in Love

Capricorns can be a bit prickly and reserved at first. They don’t always open up very easily. Don’t mistake this for snobbery though - most often, the Capricorn will hide their feelings out of a fear of exposing too much of themselves. It can take a while to really get to know the true person under their exterior reserve. These qualities don’t always make for the most capital-R Romantic partners. However, once he opens up a Capricorn man will be there for you for life.

Because Capricorns tend toward the negative, they often need a partner who can balance those tendencies with a sense of optimism. Most significantly, Capricorns need a partner they can trust and who can be their confidant. In relationships, the external reserve will wash away and their warm and loving nature will emerge. Capricorns are also very supportive partners, who can always be relied upon when things are toughest. Capricorns are also very trustworthy as partners, and make it easy for their partners to trust them.

The Capricorn tendency toward traditionalism holds true for their style as lovers. For them, sex and love go hand in hand.

The way to a Capricorn’s heart is through his brain. Engage with him on an intellectual level. Also remember not to rush and that you have to really earn a Capricorn’s trust before he will open up.

Be respectful of them and their time: which means be on-time and don’t flake if you’ve made a date.

Astrological Compatibility

What signs are most compatible with a Capricorn?

Capricorn & Cancer

opposites attract with Cancers and Capricorns!
opposites attract with Cancers and Capricorns!

This pairing can be filed under “opposites attract.” Though opposing signs, Cancers and Capricorns are good matches. While the Capricorn can take care of business, the Cancer can step in when emotional support or counseling is needed. Both signs are temperamentally conservative, and share a similarly deep commitment to achieving goals, which establishes a strong foundation for a long-term relationship. At the same time, the Cancer can help the more buttoned-up Capricorn relax and enjoy life a bit more.

Capricorn & Taurus

Capricorns and Tauruses are highly compatible.
Capricorns and Tauruses are highly compatible.

Capricorn & Virgo

Capricorns and Virgo are a solid match.
Capricorns and Virgo are a solid match.

This pairing has a number of core similarities that make for a solid foundation to a relationship. Both are sensible, practical, and temperamentally conservative. Both also are relatively risk-averse and have high standards for others. However, while the Capricorn is more focused on career and business, the Taurus is more motivated by relationships. The Taurus’ focus on relationships and the Capricorn’s focus on career makes this potential match potentially both conflict-prone and complementary. The more emotionally-centered Taurus can find the Capricorn too controlling and restrictive, while the ambitious Capricorn may find the Taurus lazy and not sufficiently focused on career goals. On the other hand, the Taurus can help the Capricorn relax a bit and have some fun, while the Capricorn can help motivate the Taurus to achieve goals.

Capricorns and Virgos are joined by their shared pragmatism, rationality, and high expectations both of themselves and others. Virgos are attracted to the Capricorn’s ambition and commitment, while the Capricorn is drawn to Virgo’s intuitiveness and focus on detail. Both signs are focused on achieving financial security and have perfectionist tendencies.

Incompatible Star Signs

Which signs are least compatible with Capricorns?

Capricorn & Aries

Opposites don't attract with Capricorn and Aries.
Opposites don't attract with Capricorn and Aries.

With this matching, opposites don’t attract but repel. The Aries’ spontaneity and risk-taking often clashes with the Capricorn who always looks before leaping. Likewise, the Aries is loud, flashy, and the belle of the ball, while the Capricorn is unassuming. Both signs also look for very different things in their potential romantic partners. The Aries will impetuously and impulsively pursue the person to whom they’re attracted, while Capricorns will more fully consider whether a match can help them achieve their goals.

Capricorn & Gemini

Geminis can be a bit too freewheeling for Capricorns.
Geminis can be a bit too freewheeling for Capricorns.

The conventional and right-brained Capricorn will inevitably clash with the whimsical and outside-of-the-box thinking of the Gemini. Likewise, the Capricorn’s insistence on playing by the rules will conflict with the Gemini tendency to skirt the rules and find loopholes.

Capricorn & Leo

Capricorns and Leos may clash.
Capricorns and Leos may clash.

Leo is the quintessential social butterfly and can easily exhaust the more introverted Capricorn. Like the Gemini, the Leo is also a bit too unconventional for the traditional-minded Capricorn.

Capricorn & Sagittarius

Capricorn and Sagittarius are not a match made in heaven.
Capricorn and Sagittarius are not a match made in heaven.

It is likely that Capricorns and Sagitarii won’t see eye to on anything. The latter are impulsive, whimsical, and utterly impractical - a poor fit for the Capricorn’s methodical nature.

What Are Some Helpful Things that Will Assist You When Dealing With A Capricorn Male?

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    • profile image


      3 years ago

      So to follow my last comment^^ .... If he texts me within the next couple days and pretends like it's all hunky dory.. Should I say something? Like "I don't think we're on the same page" or something along the lines of asking him what in the world is going on... Or does he know what he's doing?

    • profile image


      3 years ago

      Wow. This helped so much. Just recently met a Capricorn online and we've been on probably 6 dates, he was very present, and all of a sudden after he 5th he just drops off. So I initiated hanging out again and we did and then I back off because I wanted to see if he would make effort. He texted me and asked how something I was doing was going and I responded and got no answer. Two days later he texted me and asked my upcoming schedule... Told him when I was free and literally no response. That was two days ago! I don't get it.... I'm not clingy or pushy. Very busy In my own life. And things we going great... This enlightened me though. I will just wait it out and see if he wants to make the moves or not. Thanks!!!!

    • profile image


      3 years ago

      Ive been dating a Capricorn since late August and he has now disappeared. We had great sex the last time I saw him and then he disappeared. When I asked him what is happening and why he is all of a sudden distant, he said that his close friend passed away and he just want to be alone but I shouldn't be upset or stop talking to him. He continue to send him an encouraging text everyday and wish him a good day. He will respond and wish me the same. I haven't seen him in almost 3 weeks and I ask him if he is ok. He said he just haven't been himself lately. Its just frustrating for me because I really like this guy. I told him I feel as if he is pushing me away but he say he is not and I am thinking too hard. The last thing I told him is that I don't feel like I should be begging for anyone's time. He haven't responded and its been 2 days. Its too much for me to deal with as a Libra.

    • profile image


      3 years ago

      no Aquarius and cappy compatibility?

      It's actually pretty good. I actually understand why he backs off a lot of the time.

      And when i react it isn't emotional per say (only when my scorpio moon kicks in.) i just find it rude. But I won't sweat.

      Which is why I think he keeps coming back.

    • profile image


      3 years ago

      They are a contradiction! And a pain in the arse! But their insides are very delicious and their character is intoxicating. It's a roller coaster of emotions to balance selfcare and affording allowances to them.

      But, put your heart out there and fight for it, give it meaning, love like they used to when life was simple. Love is simple. If he doesn't get it, you still will and you will learn so much about yourself. Just be the beautiful lady you've always been and wait to see if he's the one. Having time to concentrate on you is never a bad thing xx

    • profile image


      3 years ago

      capricorn man are horrible beings! i'm sick of listening these beautiful phrases about their supposed wonderful personality that's just excuses for you to let them woo you. don't buy this crap you see a capricorn run away! they really are awful, however do what you want. im running very far away if i see one in the near future.

    • profile image


      3 years ago

      I've been dating this Cap for 2 weeks and he has disappeared one already. I think that he knows, that he's wrong as he has offered an explanation.....but nothing after that, no texts,no calls.....I'm definitely going to adhere the the reference above !

      Thank you!!

    • profile image


      3 years ago

      To add he had many

    • profile image


      3 years ago

      worst people to be with constantly having to put up with they're ignorance .. Only nice when they want something .. Don't waste your time on capricorn men only out for number one just let them do what they do best sit there feeling sorry for themselves fucking loners !

    • profile image


      3 years ago

      Hey. He is not talking to me. Every time he over reacts and i am the one to text him first. He ignores me a lot. And then he expect me to reply him within seconds. He is quite when he is mad and Acts like strangers. I love him more than anything in this world. But all he can see is his own pride and ego. I am sagittarius and i want him back but i don't want to be the first one this time. Because he takes me for granted every time. What should i do? Please help.

    • profile image


      3 years ago

      omg this is so on point.. i definitely wont be answering his calls or texts and i have apologized for hurting his feelings. sigh.. he's so touchy man ..

    • DavidCombs profile image


      3 years ago

      Great hub! Also great insight on the male Capricorn mentality.

    • profile image


      3 years ago

      No pisces + cap compatibility!?


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