- Gender and Relationships
Dating a Capricorn Man: What to Do When a Capricorn Pulls Away
What to Do When Your Capricorn Man Pulls Away
Are you in a relationship with a Capricorn man? If so, does he pull away, become distant, or disappear only to pop back into your life later (just when you've stopped caring)?
I'm not a man but I am a Capricorn, so I hope I can provide some help and advice on the intricacies of Capricorn behavior and provide a platform to share and discuss your Cappy man and his strange, yet alluring ways.
Why is My Capricorn Man So Distant?
So, what does it mean when a Capricorn pulls away? Does he just need space?
Capricorn men are the ultimate "lone wolves," and I would most definitely say that YES, they do need their space. So, does this mean that if your Capricorn man is pulling away, he's unhappy or upset? Not necessarily!
There are several things to consider. First, there may be some external stress that has absolutely nothing to do with you and which you may not be aware of.
Also, Capricorns tend to be focused on work. It usually will come first!
Another thing to remember is that Caps are very sensitive. If he's pulled away, could it be that his feelings were hurt? If you know you've hurt him, then be a straight shooter and sincerely apologize.
If he's pulled away after getting close to you, then just relax! Capricorns need a lot of time to think and reflect. This could be his way of mulling over his next step with you. If you want to make a relationship with a Capricorn work, you’re going to need a pretty big reservoir of patience.
Warning: Do NOT Chase a Capricorn Man!
When Your Capricorn Pulls Away, Let Him Chase You
So what should you do when your Capricorn has pulled away, and stopped texting, calling, or initiating?
- Give him some space. The worst thing you can do when he's pulled away is to keep asking him about it, texting, and calling him. Let him come to you. In the meantime, go about your life and keep as busy as possible. Find a new hobby, go out with friends, take salsa lessons, or do whatever you want to and have fun meeting new people.
- Don't respond immediately. When he does call or text you after he's disappeared (for more than a week!) do not, I repeat, DO NOT call or text him back right away. Wait a few days. After all, he's disappeared on you. By doing this, you are letting him know that there are repercussions for his bad behavior. This is bad behavior, no matter what lame excuse he gives you. And really, he knows what he did was wrong. Do not allow him back into your life as if nothing has happened.
- Stay calm. At the same time, do not get overly emotional or angry with him. You need to be cool and distant and not like you have been waiting around for his call. If you get angry or overly emotional, he will know that you are much more invested than he is. This may lead him to disappear all over again. Why? Because he thinks he can get away with it. After all, if you answered his call right away he realizes that while his bad behavior makes you crazy you still adore him and accept that behavior. Don't do it. You need to come across as aloof and as if it really doesn't matter very much to you that he's disappeared. You are, after all, a very busy woman with a busy life of her own.
What to Do When Your Capricorn Reappears
It's important to note that when he's popped right back into your life without a care in the world and providing a lame excuse as to why he went MIA for so long, he cannot expect for things to just pick up from where they left off. That's unfair for you. So what do you do?
- Be cordial, but cool. Do keep your guard up! Do not drop everything you are doing or rearrange your schedule just because he's come back. If you do this, you are setting yourself up for another disappearance in the near future.
- Decide what you want. This is ALSO the time to ask yourself if you really want to be in a relationship with a man who is hot and cold like this. Maybe once is forgivable, but after the second or third time of being MIA, it's a pattern and it will most likely be repeated.
- Set clear boundaries. Remember that he needs to be taught that you will NOT tolerate this type of behavior and disappearing is NOT okay.
If he never comes back, then you know he just wasn't that interested. It doesn't mean there is anything wrong with you, he just wasn't the right man for you and probably did not have what it took to be in a relationship with anyone! After all, you deserve a man who will stick by you through thick and thin and not a little boy who runs away at the drop of a hat.
The Capricorn Man in Love
Top Tips to Keep Your Capricorn Man Interested
- Stay very busy and don't be needy (needy/clingyness is a big mistake).
- Do NOT play games with this man (he will know when you are and will lose interest FAST).
- Be sincere, honest, and straightforward (he will appreciate it).
- Don't lay all your feelings for him on the table (let him feel like he's winning you over little by little).
- Have a life and friends of your own to enjoy (outside of your relationship with him). You will need them when he goes MIA.
- No matter how fast he moves at first, you need to slow it down. Delay being intimate for as long as possible!
What to Do When Your Capricorn Pulls Away
This is something that not just Capricorn men do but almost ALL men do. In a way, he could be testing you so don't buy into it.
If he has stopped texting, calling, or emailing, then YOU need to back off too. This will serve several purposes.
- You'll know where you stand. If you back off and never hear from him again, then he is just not interested so you can move on. He did you a favor and eliminated himself! If he comes back, then you know he's interested. This is why it's crucial that you back off when he does! When you do that, it gives him time to re-evaluate his position and then proceed to chase you.
- It'll throw him off his game. Your backing off (not calling, texting, nothing!) will make him realize that you are different. You're doing the opposite of what other women usually do!
- It denies him validation. Also, men will pull away to get reassurance of some kind to see where they stand with you. So guess what? When you go buck wild and start blowing up his phone and sending messages and complaining, you're validating him! He now knows that you really like him and are most likely more into him than he's into you. The allure and your mystery is gone.
- You'll keep your leverage. When you back off, he will become unsure of himself, wondering why you are not chasing him. He will realize that you are different and are not following him around like a puppy dog calling and texting him. All the other women gave him that validation, why aren’t you? He'll get curious and decide to call you up and see what you have going on.
That cool, calm exterior will pull him back in. He'll snap right back, just like a rubber band.
You Need to Be Very Patient with Him
Will Disappearing Capricorn Man Come Back?
If he really cares, he will come back around. Whether you decide to allow him back in your life is completely up to you. In the meantime, it's your job to enjoy yourself and have fun. Don't invest yourself too much into this man until he has made a real commitment to you and shown you how much he cares for you.
Keep in mind that a man who truly cares about you will NEVER leave you wondering where you stand with him. There will be no doubts in your mind. He will make you feel secure and loved. Why? Because he does not want to risk losing you.
The Capricorn Man - A Guide for Women
Capricorns tend to be great people to plan a future with. They’re smart, hardworking, responsible, and disciplined. Very goal-oriented and capable of sacrificing short-term pleasure for long-term gain. Capricorns also tend to be a bit more traditional and conservative. Capricorns are often very career-oriented, focusing their early years on establishing a successful career and only then turning toward love and family. For them, financial security is a prerequisite to any long-term committed relationship.
They’re not huge social butterflies, preferring a smaller circle of more intimate acquaintances.
Capricorns also tend to be a bit sensitive. They don’t do well with teasing, and if you offend them you should own up to it and apologize at the earliest opportunity.
Other Capricorn qualities include: prudence, patience, and steadiness. These Capricorn qualities also have a darker side to them when taken too far, which can lead some Capricorns to become overly negative, suspicious, ruthless, and inflexible.
Capricorns in Love
Capricorns can be a bit prickly and reserved at first. They don’t always open up very easily. Don’t mistake this for snobbery though - most often, the Capricorn will hide their feelings out of a fear of exposing too much of themselves. It can take a while to really get to know the true person under their exterior reserve. These qualities don’t always make for the most capital-R Romantic partners. However, once he opens up a Capricorn man will be there for you for life.
Because Capricorns tend toward the negative, they often need a partner who can balance those tendencies with a sense of optimism. Most significantly, Capricorns need a partner they can trust and who can be their confidant. In relationships, the external reserve will wash away and their warm and loving nature will emerge. Capricorns are also very supportive partners, who can always be relied upon when things are toughest. Capricorns are also very trustworthy as partners, and make it easy for their partners to trust them.
The Capricorn tendency toward traditionalism holds true for their style as lovers. For them, sex and love go hand in hand.
The way to a Capricorn’s heart is through his brain. Engage with him on an intellectual level. Also remember not to rush and that you have to really earn a Capricorn’s trust before he will open up.
Be respectful of them and their time: which means be on-time and don’t flake if you’ve made a date.
What signs are most compatible with a Capricorn?
Capricorn & Cancer
This pairing can be filed under “opposites attract.” Though opposing signs, Cancers and Capricorns are good matches. While the Capricorn can take care of business, the Cancer can step in when emotional support or counseling is needed. Both signs are temperamentally conservative, and share a similarly deep commitment to achieving goals, which establishes a strong foundation for a long-term relationship. At the same time, the Cancer can help the more buttoned-up Capricorn relax and enjoy life a bit more.
Capricorn & Taurus
Capricorn & Virgo
This pairing has a number of core similarities that make for a solid foundation to a relationship. Both are sensible, practical, and temperamentally conservative. Both also are relatively risk-averse and have high standards for others. However, while the Capricorn is more focused on career and business, the Taurus is more motivated by relationships. The Taurus’ focus on relationships and the Capricorn’s focus on career makes this potential match potentially both conflict-prone and complementary. The more emotionally-centered Taurus can find the Capricorn too controlling and restrictive, while the ambitious Capricorn may find the Taurus lazy and not sufficiently focused on career goals. On the other hand, the Taurus can help the Capricorn relax a bit and have some fun, while the Capricorn can help motivate the Taurus to achieve goals.
Capricorns and Virgos are joined by their shared pragmatism, rationality, and high expectations both of themselves and others. Virgos are attracted to the Capricorn’s ambition and commitment, while the Capricorn is drawn to Virgo’s intuitiveness and focus on detail. Both signs are focused on achieving financial security and have perfectionist tendencies.
Incompatible Star Signs
Which signs are least compatible with Capricorns?
Capricorn & Aries
With this matching, opposites don’t attract but repel. The Aries’ spontaneity and risk-taking often clashes with the Capricorn who always looks before leaping. Likewise, the Aries is loud, flashy, and the belle of the ball, while the Capricorn is unassuming. Both signs also look for very different things in their potential romantic partners. The Aries will impetuously and impulsively pursue the person to whom they’re attracted, while Capricorns will more fully consider whether a match can help them achieve their goals.
Capricorn & Gemini
The conventional and right-brained Capricorn will inevitably clash with the whimsical and outside-of-the-box thinking of the Gemini. Likewise, the Capricorn’s insistence on playing by the rules will conflict with the Gemini tendency to skirt the rules and find loopholes.
Capricorn & Leo
Leo is the quintessential social butterfly and can easily exhaust the more introverted Capricorn. Like the Gemini, the Leo is also a bit too unconventional for the traditional-minded Capricorn.
Capricorn & Sagittarius
It is likely that Capricorns and Sagitarii won’t see eye to on anything. The latter are impulsive, whimsical, and utterly impractical - a poor fit for the Capricorn’s methodical nature.