- Gender and Relationships
Why I Changed My Mind About Online Dating
Why I Changed My Mind About Online Dating
I will admit I had a lot of preconceived notions about online dating. Blame it on my age, my demographics or my upbringing, but I never seriously considered online dating as an option for myself or anyone I knew.
Here's my view of the whole process
I'm not kidding.
I will admit I had a lot of preconceived notions about online dating. Blame it on my age, my demographics or my upbringing, but I never seriously considered online dating as an option for myself or anyone I knew. Labelled "old" and "out-of-touch" by my children, I will admit to being a lot more traditional and conservative in my thinking than today's generation.
The entire subject would probably have remained in the "you-have-got-to-be-kidding" category if I had remained married. But life has a way of surprising us and my life is no exception. Newly divorced and free to explore all my options, several friends insisted that I go online and sign up. Still not convinced, it took over a year and a job change to finally put me in a place of curiosity. After all, what did I have to lose? Whether I connected with someone or not, at least I could get my friends off my back and answer my own questions about the subject.
So I mustered up the courage and joined a popular international online dating site. The process was more detailed than I imagined and yet that somehow made me feel better about it. If it took a few minutes to fill in all the blanks, I figured that was the case for other people as well. This made me feel that the singles that took the time to genuinely answer questions and fill out the personal profile were as serious as I was.
Once I completed the registration process, the website encouraged me to "post" a few photos of myself. I will admit that I was already looking at some ladies' profiles, and they all had photos. So I decided to ask a buddy of mine to take a few pictures of me and help me get them set up on the website. I was pleasantly surprised how easy that turned out to be and what a difference it made in the number of ladies that contacted me.
To be honest, I really wasn't ready for what happened next! In one day, I had over 75 different ladies email me! How could this be? I am not a doctor, lawyer or a movie star. I am actually a fairly average guy. I could stand to lose twenty pounds and my hair is more gray than brown these days. But I have to admit I was flattered. It definitely boosted my ego and gave me the courage to answer some of the ladies.
At first, I just answered the ladies in the order I got their emails. But I could tell right away that this could become a full time job. I realized I needed to figure out what I was really looking for. I started paying more attention to the ages and geographical locations of the ladies. This really helped a lot. I knew I wasn't interested in starting a new family at my age, and I also didn't want to introduce my kids to a gal that was their age. So I was able to sort through my emails much quicker. I even got a little bit more creative with my own profile description and basically said what I was looking for; a mature, beautiful, fun, adventure some lady with no kids or grown kids that was ready to settle down with someone that liked to hunt, camp, swim and laugh.
Ladies that were my daughters' age quit writing or I just did not respond to them. Women that really read my profile and started asking me real questions came to the forefront. I am now writing about a dozen women. They have all helped change my mind about the online dating process. Without a computer and the internet, I would never have met these ladies. Several of them have become very special friends and I look forward to hearing from them regularly. As we get to know each other, I realize that online dating is really not such a bad idea. It is affordable and it is safe. I am not looking for a fling; I am looking for my love partner. With a webcam, I can see and hear a lady and vice versa. It may not be as satisfying as a first date, but in many ways it is better.
Great Stuff on Amazon
Here's some of the sites I've tried so far.
- Cherry Blossoms
One of the oldest international dating sites and probably the best known