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10 Reasons Why You Should Not Revenge On Your Ex

Updated on May 20, 2017

You are thinking of every possible tactic to use to revenge on your ex. You were committed to the relationship and were faithful to your ex. You were always there for your partner. You did everything and anything you could to keep the relationship going strong and fulfilling. You proved to be a trusted person.

You cannot understand why your ex led the relationship to its demise. You think of every possible way to hurt her too. You are furious and your hatred for your ex knows no boundary. You want to get even. You want to show your ex you’re not the kind of person to be treated however, and dumped the same.

Before you revenge, take a moment to consider the following:

  • In the short-term you’ll feel happy about it. You’ll feel relieved. How about in the long-term? Will you still feel happy about it? Won’t you feel ashamed of yourself?
  • How do you think your ex will view you? Don’t you think it will matter a lot how your ex will view you? In what light will she view you? Won’t she think she did the right thing to dump you? Why not show her by not revenging you’re proving there is more to life than having a relationship with her?

  • Don’t you think when you revenge; in essence, you’re allowing the hurtful (negative) emotions to control your mind? And for that matter, your life? It means you are not dealing with the negative emotions. If you don’t deal with these emotions they will take you for a ride you’ll regret of ever agreeing.
  • If you revenge on your ex, don’t you think she will be hurt to the extent she will be affected extremely negatively? Would you want to witness your ex’s life deteriorating to the worst possible scenario? She might end up depressed, have low self-esteem, turn out insane or even commit suicide. The possibilities are many.
  • Are you able to trust yourself when it comes to controlling negative emotions? When you revenge it means you’re unable to control hurtful emotions when someone hurts or wrongs you. You have to learn to control negative emotions when something-not-good affects your life at that moment in a hurtful manner.

  • There is nothing worse in this world than regretting. “I wish I didn’t do that”… “I wish I hadn’t behaved that way”… and so on. When you regret it means you have come to the realization revenge doesn’t help. For now, you may think it is the right thing to do. You will even point to quotes of famous people who said revenge is the best option to get even. You might even quote from Holy Scriptures, ‘a tooth for a tooth and an eye for an eye.’ But, have you taken time to read further whereby it says if someone slaps you on one cheek offer him the other one? Do you believe in those who say you should revenge?
  • When you revenge you’re setting yourself as a prisoner. Ever heard why it’s important to forgive? You set yourself free from the negative emotions from having control of your life. So, when you revenge you’re imprisoning yourself and you’re the only one who can set yourself free by not letting the emotions control your life. After revenging, other negative emotions will spring up such as feeling stupid and an idiot; feelings you aren’t looking forward to experience for a long period of time.

  • In the long term, you’ll not respect yourself. You might end up despising yourself. You’ll hate yourself and you might end up depressed and have low self-esteem. You’ll not love yourself, and if you intend to be in another relationship, you’ll cause problems in that relationship since the emotions that resulted from revenging are still hunting you. This isn’t good. Revenge is like a shadow hounding you which will make your life despondent because of the resultant emotions of revenge.
  • The reason for revenging is in order to earn respect from your ex. You want your ex to know you’re not anybody, you’re somebody. Don’t you think as long as your ex lives on this world (maybe she’s already married), he/she will always regard you in high esteem for not revenging? She’ll wonder why you didn’t revenge. When someone holds you in high-esteem, you know what it means. She respects you with the highest respect possible. And, she will always be jealous she’s no longer with you when she sees you’re moving on nicely with your life.
  • Forget revengeful actions which take place in movies. The actions never affect actors/actresses either positively or negatively. Why not watch real life stories? Why not read real life stories? They will prove revenge never pays. It just makes a person more miserable.

As you can see it’s not good to revenge. It doesn’t pay at all. Choose not to revenge. The best you can do is forgive your ex, and move on with your life. It will be painful but in time the pain will be no more and you’ll feel good about yourself.

The best revenge on an ex

Quotes On Not To Revenge

  1. Grudges are for those who insist that they are owed something; forgiveness, however, is for those who are substantial enough to move on. (Criss Jami)
  2. Anger, resentment and jealousy doesn’t change the heart of others – it only changes yours. (Shannon L. Alder)
  3. Not forgiving is like drinking rat poison and then waiting for the rat to die. (Anne Lamott)
  4. While seeking revenge, dig two graves – one for yourself. (Douglas Horton)
  5. I’m not one to take revenge. If someone does something wrong to me I leave it in the hands of the universe to take care of that person. (Lana Parilla)
  6. Never does the human soul appear so strong as when it foregoes revenge and dares to forgive an injury. (Edwin Hubbel Chapin)
  7. Living well is the best revenge. (George Herbert)
  8. The best revenge is to live on and prove yourself. (Eddie Vedder)
  9. Revenge is not always sweet, once it is consummated we feel inferior to our victim. (Emile M. Cioran)
  10. Revenge is often like biting a dog because the dog bit you. (Austin O’Malley)


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    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 10 months ago

      "The reason for revenging is in order to earn respect from your ex. You want your ex to know you’re not anybody, you’re somebody." - That's a sad state to be in.

      Oftentimes the person (enacting revenge) comes off like the "crazy one", "stalker", plain "pitiful" once their efforts become known to the masses. Certain revenge acts can lead to jail.

      You should NOT give a damn about what your ex thinks!

      They are your (EX)!

      In order to "move on" one has to "let go".

      It's impossible to find "new love" if you're dwelling on your ex.

      7. Living well is the BEST revenge! - That's the truth!

    • Venkatachari M profile image

      Venkatachari M 10 months ago from Hyderabad, India

      Wow! That's​ so noble a perspective of yours. I love that very much. You are great really.