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A Treasure in the Arms of Christ
God Grants Requests
I have been thinking a lot about things that have happened in my past that I am not quite proud of. The sermon my pastor preached this past Sunday was about “Overcoming Satan” http://gatewayaddisonny.com/ and it has a lot to do with why we tend to have our past creep up on us. I don’t believe that we should allow for this to have us feel condemned in any way whatsoever. I myself am not feeling condemnation in any way. Now I am just feeling somewhat relieved in a sense that my slate has been wiped clean. I had prayed before attending church earlier this week and had asked God to help me stay righteous in my ways because I had felt like I was slipping in some areas of my life as I am sure many people have. During our worship at church I had been led to a scripture and looked it up. The scripture that was heavy in my mind was 1 Chronicles 4:10 which states “…Oh, that You would bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evil, that I may not cause pain! So God granted him what he requested.” I found this verse as an answer to my prayer as well as what else was said during the testimonies at church. I believe it went hand in hand with both. The church in all areas are seeking expansion to fill the seats, to go out and get the harvest, find the lost and bring them to God. In this verse it is saying that, and that God’s hand would be with us. God grants us what we ask for, maybe not right away, maybe even 10-20 years down the road, he answers prayers on His time.
What I had prayed for myself was that I was slipping away from being righteous, I was lashing out at the people I love and I had no reason to, maybe it was my own pain I was feeling and I was handing it over to my loved ones instead of seeking God or Christ to take the burden for me. That part of the verse I felt was for myself from my prayer as I was causing pain to others, and it was the evil that was causing me to anger so quickly, as it had a grip on me hardening my heart. I lacked prayer last week, I was not praying, I was not avoiding it but simply just not doing it. I find when this happens I do slip, I fall away slightly from God and that is when the enemy takes a jump for us because the enemy knows we are weak. I had analyzed this after church and realized that it was my past that had a hold on me causing me to be angry with others from my own pain. I did not have a great childhood, definitely not a storybook ending to one that’s for sure. I have struggled with forgiveness, even though I had told God in prayer that I did forgive, I don’t think I completely followed through with it in my heart and since it was the Christmas season I think it came out to affect me more so than I had anticipated. When I had came to find Christ as my savior my mother had fallen away from me because of it. There has been a lot of pent up anger towards her over the years because she had left my sister and I when I was 11, my sister 13 to move away to another state with her boyfriend at the time. There was very little communication over the years and she had eventually moved back when I was in my senior year in high school trying to be my best friend after all the lost time and there was a lot of unforgiveness on my part. Since I came to know Christ it has only gotten worse, more fights, more arguments, and basically to the point of disowning each other as mother and daughter. “But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful. "Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you." Luke 6:35-38
Fear of Loss
I look back on the past and I am not angry anymore because I have forgiven, finally. “And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins” Mark 11:25 It was not easy for me but the sad part is that there is not forgiveness on the other side of this. I was unable to see her or my grandmother for Christmas, as she tried to go behind my back and take my children from their father for the holidays and I am grateful that he was truthful with me and made sure that whatever happened was what I had decided. I allowed him to let her come to his house to see the children but I did not allow her to take them as she is involved with psychics and mediums and the realm of that sort of stuff. I do not want my children exposed to that as it would not be good for them with her trying to get them to fall away from Christ. I do trust my children though because they stand firm in their faith for Christ and God and have actually tried to minister to her on their own to try to get her to see the truth and come to our church just to try it once. However after the conversation the other night she had made it clear with my son that she will never come to our church or any church. I find myself very sorrowful as none of us can help her find Christ, all we can do is pray for her and ask God to work in her heart as we have planted the seed, hoping that God will send the Holy Spirit to do the rest. I fear that she will not accept Christ as her Savior and the worst will happen in the end.
We Are Forgiven
Now that I have shared with you the reasons for my anger I would like to let people know that you don’t have to go through this. It is the devil that tries to captivate our mind with the past lives that we had lived before finding Christ and causing us to feel condemned so that we do not feel worthy of God’s grace. I was listening to a song in which I posted on here from YouTube by Sanctus Real called “Forgiven”, this song really spoke to me and part of the lyrics that really stood out to me were “When I don’t fit in and I don’t feel like I belong anywhere, when I don’t measure up to much in this life Oh I’m a treasure in the arms of Christ ♥ – ‘Cause I’m forgiven, Well I’m forgiven, and I don’t have to carry the weight of who I’ve been cause I’m forgiven” We all know what we have been as individuals in our past and the greatest gift we have received was the grace of God by finding Christ as our savior because through Christ we can go to the father as stated in John 14:6 “Jesus said to him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me” We don’t have to carry the weight of who we have been because we HAVE BEEN FORGIVEN, the easiest way to overcome Satan is by the blood of Christ and the Word of Testimony, know it and live it! “Who is a God like you, who pardons sin and forgives the transgression of the remnant of his inheritance? You do not stay angry forever but delight to show mercy. You will again have compassion on us; you will tread our sins underfoot and hurl all our iniquities into the depths of the sea.” Micah 7:18-19 Regardless of the doubt or past that creeps in and plays with your mind you can stop it and overcome it you can say - I know that I am the bride of Christ, and I am a treasure in the arms of Christ. Amen.