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Angel Fish -- my best friend sent me messages from the other side of the veil

Updated on January 12, 2013

artwork inspired by Angel Fish dream

Angel Fish, oil on board by Vera Lin, 2012, Auckland, New Zealand
Angel Fish, oil on board by Vera Lin, 2012, Auckland, New Zealand | Source

Stacy was the most beautiful girl I had ever met.

Her last name was Yu, which, in Mandarin, sounds exactly like a fish.

She stood out, like a beautiful pink rose among wild daisies, and literally turned heads wherever she went. Nobody could resist craning head just to be able to look at her a little longer. For me, her beauty was like something out of this world.

And she was very kind. For it was her kindness that saw us became friends.

I was crying bitterly in the class one day. I couldn’t stop. It had only been a little over a month since we started our new life at the university campus. When they asked for someone to take charge of a stage performance, I gamely volunteered. I think it was because I had something to prove to myself. I had fell from grace and totally blundered the University Entrance Exam. From my proud and privileged position at the very first girls’ high school in Taiwan, I had plunged to the bottom and only made it into one of the last universities. I needed extra help for this stage performance but so many had turned me down. Somehow I thought I would never be able to pull the performance off and that I had failed once again. The very thought of failure broke my brave façade and ripped every very last bit of respect I still had for myself to shreds. I was at a dire emotional crisis that my mere 18 years of age was incapable of withstanding. My tears started flowing, silently, in the middle of the class, and would not stop, to such an alarming extent that my teacher repeatedly stopped the class to enquire after my wellbeing. I just shook my head wordlessly, powerless to stop the tears from falling in an alarming speed.

At the end of the class, after everyone had left, my teacher insisted on prying from me the reason for my distress. Stacy waited, somehow made up her mind to become my friend and to comfort me. I would have never dreamed of approaching her otherwise, feeling too unworthy from my severe lack of self-esteem. I never dreamed that I would become the best friend of an angel.

Together, we sang and wrote poetry, as dreamy as only young girls could be. Over the years, we performed a great many successful English Dramas, where I was always the director and she was always the leading lady. At the end, she would address me in all her letters as “my one and only director”. Even years after I moved to New Zealand with my family, our friendship prevailed.

She got married, but in my heart of hearts, I scarcely believed anyone could ever deserve her. The day that I got the phone call from her sister to say that she had killed herself at the age of 33 was the darkest day of my life. Out of all things I learned about spirituality, I refused to believe that a suicide could not go to heaven. I could not and would not believe that would be the fate of my beautiful Stacy.

After that, she simply moved from earth right into my dreams, as scarcely a week went by without her visiting my dream like we were still the inseparable bosom friends.

Three years later, I divorced my husband of ten years. I was only 35 and we had no children. The unhappiness I had felt at the last few years of my marriage was taking its toll and I could barely remember what being happy was like. Intelligent and proud by nature, I had never coped well with failures, yet life has a way of piling them on me. I moved into a little cabin in the woods near the sea, needing all the outer tranquility to help me find some inner serenity.

Then the dream came.

In the dream, I was once again a little girl of maybe 5. I was alone by the ocean’s edge. It was nighttime but it wasn’t at all scary. The ocean waves were gentle, and the entire surface of the ocean was lit by the most beautiful moonlight, with shining silver sparkles everywhere. I was treading the water’s edge with my bare feet. Everything was warm and lovely and very charming. Then I saw them! Beautiful shining fluorescent fish no bigger then my palm jumping out of the silver waves one after another, catching in the light, glittering like nothing I had ever seen before. Even when they were just under the surface of the waves they were a magical sight. Like fluorescent fish stars. I squealed in my little girl voice, so full of wonderment and delight, “Angel Fish! Angel Fish! Angel Fish!” I woke myself up with so much excitement, my heart filled to the brim with the purest happiness I had ever felt in my life. Then I remembered Stacy’s name: Yu. Fish.“She is the fish. She is my Angel Fish.”

The feeling of pure joy revived me greatly, and I began to live again instead of merely existing from one day to the next. Every time I remember this dream, I also remember a presence. I remember I wasn’t really alone in the dream after all. There was always Jesus, with me but somewhere to the side, watching like a protective parent from a distance, smiling at a child’s delight.

Another three years later, I moved into my dream home in Kaiwaka. One night, I happened to be chatting with a friend R online. She was a very new acquaintance and we never really met in person. We were just chatting about our days when all of the sudden, out of the blue, she said, “ I have a lady here for you.” It took me a little while to realize that she meant “in spirit”. I remembered R was known for her ability as a medium.

“Ok…” I said, a little unsure of what’s going on.

“She said to tell you about the fish and you would understand.”

The fish! I immediately thought of Stacy and promptly bursted into tears.

R said the angel fish dream was indeed a special gift from Stacy. But then R started telling me that Stacy told her she had two boys living in China. Then my heart plummeted. As far as I knew, the boys lived in Taiwan with their father. I thought, “there was no way that the boys could be in China, it was all a fluke.” But R insisted. She said I must not reject it without checking it out.

The next day, I called Stacy’s sister in Taiwan. She informed me that the boys had indeed moved to China with their father a few years back due to a most profitable employment. I was astounded.

My darling Stacy had once again comforted me. She did it in life, and she would continue to do so again and again in heaven.

R told me that Stacy is with the angels now and will always watch over me from above. And I believe her. I really do.

written by Violet Flame/Vera Lin , 2012.

Stacy at the age 21
Stacy at the age 21 | Source

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    • Violet Flame profile imageAUTHOR

      Violet Flame 

      5 years ago from Auckland, NZ

      Dear moneyfairy, I guess writing for me is a bit like making music. The music of words. The only down side is that I could never write very fast lol. I read and re-read what I have just written and wait patiently for the silent music to flow. At times it writes itself, which is fantastic and I wish it would happen more often, lol. Now I am just sitting here staring at the flowers in the garden, thinking about the angels in our life. The ones that are still alive and the ones that have passed over the other side of the veil, as well as the ones that have always been with to us through the eons of time quietly guarding us without us even knowing. It makes me feel like being kind, being an angel for someone else. Thank you moneyfairy for your wonderful-ness xo

    • moneyfairy profile image

      Money Fairy 

      5 years ago from New Woodstock

      Violet Flame you have this graceful flowing way about your writing. Even in just this response about the pearl of life metaphor. I am happy to have stumbled onto your article. I believe in guardian angels and that we all came into this world with them but to actually know who your angel was from a real live person you knew that's incredible!!! Gives me goose bumps :) thanks!

    • Violet Flame profile imageAUTHOR

      Violet Flame 

      5 years ago from Auckland, NZ

      Hi moneyfairy,

      Thank you so much for your lovely comment. I am so glad that this sharing of experiences touches you in some little positive way. It certainly moved me greatly at the time of my life when I felt most vulnerable and alone. For me, human existence is but one pearly bead in a long string of a beautiful pearly necklace. The entire mystery might never become entirely clear to us at this level of experience, but it helps to think that we need not struggle alone.

    • moneyfairy profile image

      Money Fairy 

      5 years ago from New Woodstock

      What a lovely ,emotional ,powerful story. So very magical. thank you so much for sharing such a personal story!!! Loved it!!!

    • Violet Flame profile imageAUTHOR

      Violet Flame 

      5 years ago from Auckland, NZ

      Thank You Anne, yes we definitely hang out a lot in my dream still, the angel fish dream single handedly lifted me up from out of depression. I could really claim what JOY feels like, and can't help being altered for the better by that knowing. Hugs xoxo

    • bac2basics profile image

      Anne 

      5 years ago from Spain

      Hi Vera. What a beautiful and well written account of your friend coming back in spirit. She will always be there for you in times of trouble, hug that thought close to your heart always. Voted up awesome and beautiful. :)

    • Violet Flame profile imageAUTHOR

      Violet Flame 

      6 years ago from Auckland, NZ

      Thank You Jynzly, yes I am most grateful for the beautiful messages I received from above and for the comforting reassurance they offered me. We are loved beyond measures. Thank you for listening xoxo

    • Violet Flame profile imageAUTHOR

      Violet Flame 

      6 years ago from Auckland, NZ

      thank you Elani-Lee xo I am glad you like the story. It is very close to my heart xo

    • Violet Flame profile imageAUTHOR

      Violet Flame 

      6 years ago from Auckland, NZ

      Thank you g-girl11 for your vote!! Yes Stacy was very special. I remember calling her one day, she picked up the phone and all she said was "hello" but the gentle lovingness in that one simple word just almost melt my heart and I am a woman! :-D

    • Jynzly profile image

      Jenny Pugh 

      6 years ago from Marion, Indiana, USA

      Very touching story. I had just told my hubby of the experience I had; watching the sparkling wavelets of the wide sea under a moonlit night. I know how it feels, it's like God, in all His Majestic Beauty, is reaching out His Hands into our hearts.

      Thanks for sharing your story.

    • Elani-Lee profile image

      Elani-Lee 

      6 years ago from Los Angeles

      Wow, what a moving story

    • g-girl11 profile image

      g-girl11 

      6 years ago

      She sounds like she was indeed a beautiful person. So glad you got a message from her. Reminds me of a special friend I also lost tragically and when we were young. Voted up. Beautifully written.

    • Violet Flame profile imageAUTHOR

      Violet Flame 

      6 years ago from Auckland, NZ

      Thank You darling Sulora for listening to my stories. You've honoured me in your listening and I am so blessed to have you in my life! Fear not life's traversities as without them we could not become who we are destined to be. Love always xoxo

    • profile image

      Sulora 

      6 years ago

      I will always remember your stories, because they touch me to the core. Thank you for sharing these experiences with us because somewhere, it is helping someone, like me. It's strange, I must have been just a teenager when I first heard of Stacy. Now I'm nearly 30, experiencing my own personal turmoils. You and Stacy have reminded me again that whether in life or after death, we can always be where the angel fish fly.

    • Violet Flame profile imageAUTHOR

      Violet Flame 

      6 years ago from Auckland, NZ

      Dear Lady Summeset,

      Thank you very much for your lovely comment. Yes, words are not nearly enough to describe this dream. It was so vivid and vibrant, more alive then life. I had never giggled myself awake again, before or after.

    • Lady Summerset profile image

      Lady Summerset 

      6 years ago from Willingboro, New Jersey

      What a lovely story. I could almost see those sparkling and vibrant fish.

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