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Women Finding True Self-Esteem and Happiness

Updated on February 17, 2017
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Yvette is a Christian with a passion for helping people find God's purpose for their life. Her hubs are sources of daily inspiration.

We need to know deep in your hearts that God places high value on us, so you can truly love ourselves.
We need to know deep in your hearts that God places high value on us, so you can truly love ourselves. | Source

You're Someone Special

Are Self-Esteem and Happiness for Christians?

In some Christian circles, the concept of self-esteem is interpreted as an unhealthy focus on self. But there is a basis for all Christians, including women, to love themselves.

Christian Psychologist, Bruce Narramore, PhD, points out that our attitude towards ourselves is one of the most important things that we own. Genuine love for self, empowers us to love others so that we can become an effective witness in the world. Narramore argues that how we see ourselves affects every area of our lives including how we treat others.

Self-esteem is essentially how we evaluate ourselves, and how we like the picture we have of ourselves. So if we have high self-esteem, then we have a largely positive image of ourselves. The core of our self-esteem begins with our interactions in the family setting as children.

As Christians, the true source of self-esteem rests in our position in Christ Jesus. What does it mean to have a healthy self-esteem as a Christian Woman? In his book, You're Some Special, Dr Narramore, argues that according to Scriptures, God places great value on us, and this demands that we love ourselves.

From the outset of our walk, as Christian women, we need to recognise that our self-esteem is no longer based on transient characteristics, such as physical appearance, achievements, talents, social connections, or financial status. We need to refocus our attention on who we are in Christ Jesus

How can Christian experience high self-esteem, and find true happiness and personal fulfilment that are congruent with Christian teaching? This hub explores seven important areas based on Scriptures that enables Christian women to find true self-esteem and happiness.

We Are Accepted in Christ

Christian Woman:Self-Esteem and Happiness Poll

As Christian woman, are you happy and experiencing high self-esteem?

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For Christian women to embody healthy self-esteem, we need to know who we really are. We are new creations in Christ (2 Corinthians 5:17). We gained acceptance through Christ’s complete work on the Cross. We are accepted as loved, and nothing can separate us from the love of God (Romans 8: 35)

Our knowledge of who we are in Christ changes the picture of what we have of ourselves to one of value, significance and purpose. Our self-worth is now anchored on Christ and not on transient things.

We have a sense of dignity and high regard for ourselves as we see ourselves as God sees us in Christ. We know that as believers we are complete in Christ (Colossians 2:10).

Focus Verse: "Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creation: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new" (2 Corinthians 5:17, NKJ).

Prayer: Heavenly Father, thank you for your work of grace through the Cross of Jesus that I am called your daughter. By the power of your Holy Spirit, help me to understand what really means to be in Christ so that the Christ in me can shine forth as a testimony to those around me. In Jesus' Name I pray. Amen.

God's Love Letter to Us!

We Have a Personal Relationship with God

Christ’s work of grace on the Cross opens the door for our relationship with God. God's Word tells us that we were reconciled to him through the death of His Son (Romans 5:10). This opens the door for an intimate relationship with our Father.

This relationship is rich and satisfying, and no other relationship can measure up to it. Out of our relationship with our loving Father flows a sense of self, happiness and personal fulfilment.

Our Father God "gave us the right to become children of God," As Father, he knows our needs, and we can go to him freely and ask and receive his best. Out of his rich resources, flow the fruit of the Spirit of love, kindness, and goodness in our lives, and into the lives of others.

Focus Verse: "But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God, who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God" John 1: 12, 13, ESV).

"Prayer: Heavenly Father, I treasure the relationship I have with you. I can commune with you at all time and in any situation. You are always there for me to under-gird me with your love and your special care.

I am truly thankful that out of this relationship flows esteem and happiness greater than I could ever dream of. In Jesus' Name I pray. Amen.”

We are Significant in Christ

One commentator explains that the phrase "accepted in the beloved" indicates that as God's children we are highly favored. But Robert McGee, in his book, The Search for Significance points out that we all desire acceptance and as such we perform to get other people's approval.

The basis of our significance, however, rests in our position in Christ Jesus, and we don’t have to live our lives trying to get the approval of others. The story of the Pharisee and the tax collector has implications for our significance as Christian women (Luke 18: 10-14).

The Pharisee based his esteem on self and his accomplishments, but the tax collector recognized his depravity, and found the mercy of God. As Christian women recognize that who we is based on Christ and not ourselves, then we experience healthy self-esteem, and find significance.

We are branches of the true Vine, channels of Jesus’ divine life, and that is true significance!

Focus Verse: "To the praise of the glory of His grace, by which He made us accepted in the Beloved" (Ephesians 1:6. NKJ).

“Prayer: Heavenly Father, I thank you that I experience true significance through the Christ life that flows in me. I don't have to look for significance in the things around me, for I am anchored in your love. Help me to move with your confidence, and pass on your love to those around me. In Jesus' name I pray. Amen."

As Christian women, our knowledge that we are accepted and significant through Christ empowers us to have a positive impact on the lives of others.
As Christian women, our knowledge that we are accepted and significant through Christ empowers us to have a positive impact on the lives of others. | Source

We Are Created for Purpose

Joyce Meyer: The Confident Woman Devotional

If we are convinced that we are born with a special purpose, then this knowledge affects every area of our lives. The result is a sense of destiny and an acknowledgement that we are born for greatness.

Christian author and speaker, Joyce Meyer, explains that God gives us the confidence to do what we need to do. She points out that even in difficult places we can still be confident and enjoy our lives.

This sense of purpose enhances our overall picture of ourselves. The concept that we are created for purpose becomes a part our thinking and motivation as Christian women and results in more fulfilling lives.

Our purpose rests securely in the significance we experience through Christ Jesus; its by-products are true kindness and service to others. Important to our self-esteem is connectedness to others. We are to love our neighbours as ourselves, and as we love others (Mathew 22:3). Then we find happiness and personal fulfilment.

Focus Verse: "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well" (Psalm 139:1, NIV).

"Prayer: Heavenly Father I thank you for the great purpose that you created me for. Help me to find that purpose and walk in it so that I can bless others and find true fulfilment in my life. In Jesus' Name I pray. Amen."

We Choose to be Great through Serving Others

What does it Take for You to be Happy?

What do you think is the MOST important ingredient for a Christian women to experience true self-esteem and happiness?

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.When we stand confident in our position in Christ and embrace the purpose that God has for us, we are in a good place to minister to the needs of others.

Freely we receive and freely we give ourselves to serve others. International leadership coach, John Maxwell, encourages us to "add value" to other people's lives.

Jesus outlined the criteria for greatness when he was on earth and here are some examples that illustrate it:

  • To be great you must be a servant (Matthew 20:26)
  • Those who humble themselves like a child is the greatest in the kingdom (Matthew 1:4)
  • Those who exalt themselves will be humbled, but those who humble themselves will be exalted (Matthew 23:12)
  • The tax collector was justified because he humbled himself (Luke 18:4).

Our calling as Christian women is to servant-hood. Serving others is God's criteria for greatness. Let us make the choice to serve, and experience true greatness!

Focus Verse: "I have showed you all things, how that so laboring you ought to support the weak, and to remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he said, It is more blessed to give than to receive." (Acts 20:35, NKJ)

Prayer: "Heavenly Father, I choose to be great by humbling myself and serving others. Empower me by the power of the Holy Spirit to reach, and make a difference in people's lives. I the Name of Jesus I pray. Amen."

We Find Our Sufficiency in God

As Christian women, we find our sufficiency in God, and we draw strength from him to meet every situation in our lives.
As Christian women, we find our sufficiency in God, and we draw strength from him to meet every situation in our lives. | Source

Many Christian women are plagued with feelings of inadequacy. They compare themselves with others and feel that they are not good enough. But that's a lie!

Our sufficiency is in God, and so the Apostle Paul writes: "By ourselves, we are not qualified in any way to claim that we can do anything. Rather, God makes us qualified"(2 Corinthians 3:5, GWT)

Yes, that's it! While we might not feel qualified based on our training and experiences or even what people have told us all our lives, God's Word tells us that he makes us qualified.

Whose report will we believe? It's time to stop listening to the put-downs of others, and the lies of Satan that bombard our minds. Let us spend time meditating on what the Word of God says about.

Through a revelation of God’s Word in our spirits, we can come to a genuine understanding that our strength comes from God, and we are sufficient in him. So even in tough times, we can find strength in God. The Apostle Paul says when we are weak, then are we strong in God (2 Corinthians 12:10).

Focus Verse: "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:13, NKJ).

“Prayer: Heavenly Father, give me a fresh revelation that I can do all things through you who give me the strength. I humble myself and draw all my sufficiency from you daily for every situation I face. Thank you that you cause me always to triumph in Christ! In Jesus" Name I pray. Amen."

Woman of Courage: Elizabeth McCormick

We are Courageous

We face adversities in our lives as Christian women, but we can be courageous in hard times because our anchor is in Christ Jesus. When trouble comes we dig even deeper in God's Word and refuse to budge. We stand on what God says about us and how he tells us to deal with trying situations.

An endearing quality of the women who stood out in the Bible was their courage in extremely difficult situations. Read the stories of women like:

  • Ruth (Ruth 1:16 - 18)
  • Hannah (1 Samuel 1)
  • Deborah (Judges 4 and 5)
  • Esther (Esther 4)
  • The Shunammite woman (2 Kings 4: 8-37)
  • Mary the mother of Jesus (Luke 1: 26-38)

Take the charming story of a young woman called Esther in the Old Testament. She became queen at a time when there was a plot to destroy the Jews. She responded to her uncle Mordecai's challenged to intervene on behalf of her people (Esther 4).

Despite the likelihood that she could have been killed, after three day's fasting, she entered the king's presence to make a request on the behalf of her people. She said, “so will I go in unto the king, which is not according to the law: and if I perish, I perish" (Esther 4:16).

In the video, Elizabeth McCormick former Black Hawk Pilot in the US Army shares her story of determination and courage. She explains that she learned not to take on the belief system of others. She says, "You have to be sure of you beliefs ..."

What is the situation you are facing today? You too can be strong and courageous in face of whatever the circumstance you are in because God is with us.

Focus Verse: "For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline" (2 Timothy 1:7, NIV).

Prayer: "Heavenly Father, I thank you that you have given the power to stand strong in whatever circumstance I face. Remind me daily that you are always with me and will never leave, and so I can be strong and courageous in you. I Jesus' Name I pray. Amen."

Confident Woman Moving Forward

Walking as a Confident Christian Woman

What steps will you take to walk confdently as a Christian woman?

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As Jesus’ followers, women can experience life to its fullest. He came to give us abundant life (John 10: 10).

Our heavenly Father wants his daughters to enjoy rich, satisfying lives. How we see ourselves has great influence on our happiness and self-esteem. We must accept and embrace the significance of who we are in Christ. We must know deep in our hearts that we are loved unconditionally by God.

Yes, life throws us many challenges, but we must never allow these difficulties to prevent us from believing that as Christian women, God has much more for us.

Let us be courageous and stand on God's Word, believing what he says about us and not what the world or our circumstances say. Then we can move forward with the confidence that comes through knowing Christ.

© 2014 Yvette Stupart


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    • quildon profile image

      Angela Joseph 2 years ago from Florida

      You have used some of my favorite quotations such as Psalm 139: 1, Philippians 4 : 13 and 2 Timothy 1: 7. Thank you for reminding us that our self-esteem comes not from our performance, but from who we are in Christ. Voted up.

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Isaac Weithers 2 years ago from The Caribbean

      Great motivation for women. Some of us have difficulty accepting our value, but God showed us how precious we are when the Godhead chose to work with a woman (without help from a man) to bring the Savior into the world. It was His way of saying, "Woman, look what you and I can accomplish together. You're worth that much to me."

    • Inspired Heart profile image

      Yvette Stupart 2 years ago from Jamaica

      Thanks quildon. You are so right, our self-esteem as Christian women is anchored securely in Christ.

      Thanks MsDora. Indeed, we are of great worth to God! As such he has a great purpose for our lives that we should find and embrace.

    • profile image

      PMARTIN 2 years ago

      I Disagree. I believe that self esteem building is a tool used by professionals to help those in deep depression regarding self worth and are in danger. Its not to be used for the averge person because we live in a highly Prideful charged society and most of are prideful. Most people that feel inadequate do so because they didn't get their way (coveting?), need to be pampered or asked a certain way. I have seen self esteem building done in the churches and the result is arrogant rebellious women that refuse advice, compete with each outher and yes even loud confrontations--because they were taught how "great" they are as christian women. Ive seen it applied to teenagers and teens develop into stubborn (your not my boss) youth within a year. And from both groups not a bit of social work helping the poor, visiting the sick or babysitting. Instead, it's a clammer to be in charge of service or be in front in some compacity to be seen. I simply don't see "high self esteem" lining up with the sermon on the mount. We are told to love our neighbor as we love ourselves because we have such a high love of self that if we applied it to others an incredible change would take place in you and them. As we pour more and more self esteem building in to women, we ignore a high divorce rate in Christians because wives don't want a husband "telling her what to do". I read through the article and it appeared at times kind of confusing--why? Because a humble spirit is a serving spirit. A "me" spirit says otherwise. Before you tell me Im in the dark, I personally know christian divorces and this is the cause (not a bully husband as usually alledged), I have attended Bible classes on marrage and heard the rebellious spirit from single women directly (which is why they are still single and bitter). I have heard women from the pulpit, big on self esteem building telling women what they don't have to take because "they are great". then after service altercations between women breakout because of power plays or coveted positions. So you see, I think self esteem building is dangerous in today's climate and this is why humility is preached so othen in the New Testament. Have you ever notice women Bible studies NEVER is on Job' wife, Delilah, Pharoahs wife (Joseph story), Queen Herodia and the big one... Queen Jeezebel? try it sometimes...they are in the Bible for a reason.

    • Inspired Heart profile image

      Yvette Stupart 2 years ago from Jamaica

      Pmartin, these are thought-provoking comments.

      As a Christian woman of many years, I am learning that as I recognize and accept the high value God places on me, then I am able to value and love others more.

      If I don’t love and value myself, how will I be able to love and value my neighbor?



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