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Christianity Is Absurd

Updated on November 25, 2016
Sam Wickstrom profile image

Sam was a Christian for 15 years and was motivated by fear of hell-fire to be certain of whether or not God exists.

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Some Context

Matthew 5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till. heaven and earth pass, one jot or one. tittle shall in no wise pass from. the law, till all be fulfilled.

This verse essentially means that Jesus did not come to make the old testament obsolete or to change the old law into a new law. Jesus was in fact very annoyed by the teachers who taught Moses' law and did not practice it themselves.

Matthew 10:34 Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword.

Jesus is being blatantly clear, he's not a pacifist, he came to start a minimum of ideological warfare, and at most outright physical brawls over the truth of his word.

As Jesus is part of the holy trinity we must remember that he cannot hold a disagreement with his divine co-equals, God the father or God the holy spirit. In this way, the new testament cannot be in direct opposition with the old testament, and vice versa. So as I go through this description of christianity's absurdities, remember that.



Picking Cherries

A young lady out cherry picking.
A young lady out cherry picking.

Cherry Picking

Cherry picking: suppressing evidence, or the fallacy of incomplete evidence is the act of pointing to individual cases or data that seem to confirm a particular position, while ignoring a significant portion of related cases or data that may contradict that position.

Among most religions we tend to see a lot of cherry picking. Take for example Islam, they love to say that Islam is a religion of peace. And while I know that most Muslims are respectable moderates, it doesn't remove the fact that a man could pick up a Quran in a hundred years and easily use it to justify killing people.

The same thing goes for Christianity. While most Christians are deserving of respect, they are peaceful, calm, people who can have a reasonable debate about their beliefs without death threats and so on. But again, that's only because they are cherry picking the verses which are about peace, love, kindness, compassion, empathy, and such. While at the same time they are somewhat blatantly ignoring the verses which condone violence and intolerance of others. So just like with the Quran, someone could pick up the bible in a hundred years and easily use it to justify killing others.

Deuteronomy 17 If there be found among you, within any of thy gates which the LORD thy God giveth thee, man or woman, that hath wrought wickedness in the sight of the LORD thy God, in transgressing his covenant; 17:3 And hath gone and served other gods, and worshipped them, either the sun, or moon, or any of the host of heaven, which I have not commanded; 17:4 And it be told thee, and thou hast heard of it, and enquired diligently, and, behold, it be true, and the thing certain, that such abomination is wrought in Israel; 17:5 Then shalt thou bring forth that man or that woman, which have committed that wicked thing, unto thy gates, even that man or that woman, and shalt stone them with stones, till they die.

So as you can see, one could easily justify killing many people in our modern culture with verses in the bible.

Numbers 31:17-18 Now therefore kill every male among the little ones, and kill every woman that hath known man by lying with him. But all the women children, that have not known a man by lying with him, keep alive for yourselves.

In this verse we can see quite vividly that God the father condones rape of children, innocent virgin girls. And we are commanded to love this freakishly evil super being with all our heart, mind, soul, and strength. Absurd? I'd say so.

Colossians 3:12 Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience

Oh how nice, after your ancestors raped innocent little girls, now you're encouraged to be compassionate, kind, humble, gentle, and patient. Just beautiful.

Hebrews 13:18 8 Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.

With these examples you might begin to see the absolutely absurd nature of the incredibly common religion of christianity. It's not all love your neighbor, turn the other cheek, and love your enemy, a lot of it is very evil, but cherry picking allows one to keep their religion regardless of its hidden absurdities.




The Christian symbol of forgiveness, atonement, and sacrifice also happens to be an excruciatingly painful torture and execution device.
The Christian symbol of forgiveness, atonement, and sacrifice also happens to be an excruciatingly painful torture and execution device.

Death Cult

Death cults are defined as 'any organization or group that indoctrinate members in devotion or worship of death, suicide or killing'. By that definition, I would say that christianity is a death cult.

Genesis 8:20-21 Then Noah built an altar to the Lord and, taking some of all the clean animals and clean birds, he sacrificed burnt offerings on it. The Lord smelled the pleasing aroma…

Now any biblically literate christian can tell you that the bible is jam packed full of passages about sacrificing animals. Some may even remember the verse about God being dissatisfied with a fruit and veggies offering. God wants real death, none of this weak vegan shit.

Think about the whole of Christianity, take a few big steps back and just look. Essentially you have God and he decides to create imperfect beings, then upon the imperfect beings behaving imperfectly he decides to send a part of himself, his son, to be brutally maimed and sacrificed to himself, to save the imperfect beings from what he would do to them if they remained the way he created them. Makes a lot of sense doesn't it. I sometimes wonder if that's why Christianity is popular, nobody really gets it, but they think other people get it, and eventually they will get it too. But the truth is, you can't honestly comprehend a master plan so idiotically designed.

Christianity is the simple idea that death is the only way a super being can forgive the sentient beings he created, for doing what they were created to do. If God really wanted peace instead of a death cult, he could have created humans like Bonobos, just kind loving creatures with no desire to hurt others written into their genes.

Yes, bonobos do not go to war with other tribes as chimps do, but rather make love to other tribes of bonobos. So are you wondering why God didn't create humans to be loving creatures with calm temperaments?

Genesis 8:20 Then Noah built an altar to the Lord and, taking some of all the clean animals and clean birds, he sacrificed burnt offerings on it. 21 The Lord smelled the pleasing aroma

God could've created us to be like these guys who truly believe in "love not war"

Prayer

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

The Futility Of Prayer

God is all knowing, he is omniscient, and there is nothing in the future or the past that he is unaware of. Therefore, he knows what you are going to pray about in thirty years. He knows how he will respond before you pray. If God's will is perfect and unchanging, then your act of prayer is a denial of God's already perfect plan. It's a way of telling God that you don't trust him enough to hold shit together without your requests for change.

Of course some prayer is simply out of gratitude, a way of thanking God for what he has done, and what you trust he will do in the future. This kind of prayer is completely respectable to me. Aside from the fact that you are talking to your subconscious and nothing else, its still increases your health to be meditative, reflective, and grateful for what you have, as well as optimistic for the future.

I have been told by many pastors, teachers, and leaders that prayer is answered in three ways: yes, no, or wait. I'm sure you've heard of this. Has it ever occurred to you that this theory of how God answers prayer can be attributed to your turkey in the oven?

"Dear turkey, are you done cooking?" Upon checking the turkey for a response, you find his answer to be either yes, no, or wait. Or a combination of no not right now, wait a half hour.

This experiment can also be done with a statue of the Buddha, or with Allah, or a can of soup, or Thor, or Zeus, or whatever your ideal imaginary friend might be.

2.2 Billion Christians | Top 10 Nations

Nation
Percentage
Vatican City
100%
Romania
99%
Papua New Guinea
99%
Tonga
99%
Armenia
98.5%
Greece
98%
Namibia
97.6%
Marshall Islands
97.5%
Maldova
97.5%
Zambia
97.5%

Christian Comedy Thanks To Family Guy

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    • just helen profile image

      just helen 12 months ago from Dartmoor UK

      Not entirely. Self knowledge can include such stuff as I Like Curry, or I Enjoy Reading, or I Have Blond Hair etc etc.

      True self knowledge is knowing the Universe is within you, as is God, whatever your understanding of that word is.

    • Sam Wickstrom profile image
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      Sam 12 months ago from Nelson, BC, Canada

      Well in that case there is nothing mystical about it. You are simply engaging in self knowledge. (:

    • just helen profile image

      just helen 12 months ago from Dartmoor UK

      Thinking about this over the past few days, I can answer your comment on mysticism - it is the inner path not the outer path. The outer path in any religion follows the book to the letter. The inner path is about personal growth and developing an understanding of who you are. You come to the conclusion that the driving force behind everything is Love, not Law.

    • Sam Wickstrom profile image
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      Sam 12 months ago from Nelson, BC, Canada

      Other than that you have good points and I'll think on it

    • Sam Wickstrom profile image
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      Sam 12 months ago from Nelson, BC, Canada

      Well just about anything with the word mysticism attached to it makes my bullshit detectors go off. I agree that everything we have been told is a lie. Well, anything important sociologically. I would completely disagree that reason and evidence drag one further from enlightenment. That is bullshit in its entirety. The only reason I can exchange reason and evidence with you is because of the long fought battles of reason and evidence, and the many thinkers before me who were killed for using these humble tools of critical thought. I agree psychedelics can help, but I'd say they're better for culminating reason and evidence within the mind to become enlightened, one is not simply enlightened without having sought after truth for many years.

    • just helen profile image

      just helen 12 months ago from Dartmoor UK

      I don't expect you to answer, Sam. Just think on these things, and don't throw the baby out with the bathwater.

      He who has ears, let him hear.

    • just helen profile image

      just helen 12 months ago from Dartmoor UK

      Enlightenment does not and cannot come about through argument or reason. In fact, the more you do this, the further away you become from it. It comes through looking deeply into reality. Some people do this through meditation - Vipassana or Insight Meditation can be useful - others through the use of psychedelics. Others, still, by withdrawing from the world and immersing themselves in Nature.

      The first step, though, is always to Wake Up! Gnostics believe we are walking through this life asleep. We must wake up (to reality). Awakening is just the start. I know I was asleep for most of my life. Leaving the church and putting literalist christianity behind me was the start to becoming enlightened, though I'm still a long long way away from achieving that!

    • just helen profile image

      just helen 12 months ago from Dartmoor UK

      The OT, like the NT is a jumble of ancient mystical texts and ramblings of tribesmen and priests who believed the Israelites were the chosen ones of Jehovah, who has been discredited by scholars as being a mere tribal deity, who was often cruel, and tyranical. Texts which talk of slaughter have nothing to do with a deeper meaning, but reflect the brutality which went on between different factions of the day. They should not have been included in a so called holy book.

      It is vital to understand that everything you have been told is a lie. Once you realise that the cards come tumbling down and you see right through the system. Religion, politics, the Economy, the War on Drugs - we have been deceived in every area of our lives. Christianity, has been used for control and manipulation. It is important to learn the art of discernment. Not everything in the bible is true or spiritual. Much of it is rubbish. But there are truths to be found.

      Christian mysticism, like other forms of mysticism is to do with one's inner journey which can take a lifetime. The first step is to see through the lies and leave the church. Keep asking questions, keeping exploring, including looking at what other beliefs have to say. Throw out what you don't accept and leave no stone unturned.

    • just helen profile image

      just helen 12 months ago from Dartmoor UK

      I will have to do my research, Sam. I can't just say of the top of my head. I really recommend you read The Jesus Mysteries by Freke and Gandy. I was a literalist Christian for 35 years. Lost my faith because of unanswered questions, stumbled upon this book, and all became clear.

    • Sam Wickstrom profile image
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      Sam 12 months ago from Nelson, BC, Canada

      What's the deeper message behind this allegory?

      -

      Numbers 31:17-18 Now therefore kill every male among the little ones, and kill every woman that hath known man by lying with him. But all the women children, that have not known a man by lying with him, keep alive for yourselves.

    • Sam Wickstrom profile image
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      Sam 12 months ago from Nelson, BC, Canada

      If the way or dowism is the start of christianity, okay, but that doesn't change the fact that the bible is meant to be taken literally. If there are allegories and parables, its obvious. Whereas you can have entire pages of the bible dedicated to writing down the very literal names of descendants from Abraham or David for example. I dont think the people who added things to the bible were "literalists", or you'd have to give me an example because that doesnt make sense to me. If you read the bible as all allegorical, its still quite clearly nonsense. As far as carrying a deeper message, can you take one passage from my article and show me the deeper message?

    • just helen profile image

      just helen 12 months ago from Dartmoor UK

      Believing in literalist Christianity is like believing the stories of Sleeping Beauty or Cinderella are actually true. They are allegorical and carry a deeper message.

    • just helen profile image

      just helen 12 months ago from Dartmoor UK

      Literalist Christianity is clearly absurd. But the Gnostic teachings are akin to the Perennial Philosophy taught by many other religions.

      Gnosticism drew on various different teachings, such as Buddhism, Hinduism, Greek Philosophy and Egyptian beliefs.

      It is not anything to do with worshipping Jesus.Most people, modern Christians included, do not know the true origins of their religion and what it is really about.

    • just helen profile image

      just helen 12 months ago from Dartmoor UK

      Jesus did not exist!

      Paul did not write that women should keep silent in church. That was added in by literalists.

      Christianity was founded by Gnostics and was called The Way. Christianity as we know it is not true Christianity. Christianity is not to do with following a shadowy figure called Christ (who didn't exist anyway). Once you realise that the word Christ is a synonym for Consciousness a lot of things fall into place.

      The Bible is full of coded Gnostic teachings and cannot be read literally. If you read it in such a way it is clearly nonsense.

      It is allegorical.

    • Sam Wickstrom profile image
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      Sam 12 months ago from Nelson, BC, Canada

      Thats interesting but I wouldn't agree.

      Paul may have been a gnostic but he still wrote that women are to keep silent in the church. The church of jesus, who is a part of the co equal trinity with god the father who is the main character of the entire bible. So I don't think he's enough of a vague spiritualist to be called gnostic.

      I also wouldn't say that the bible has anything to do with human evolution. It constantly reflects our addiction to power, and our barbaric ways that are absolute reference to our lack of cognitive evolution.

      If you view "christianity" as something other than the literal 'mumbo jumbo' its not christianity. It's a judeo christian fan fiction spin off like jehovahs witnesses

    • just helen profile image

      just helen 12 months ago from Dartmoor UK

      I too, came to the same conclusion. The OT is full of brutality that can't be argued away. The NT, too has inconsistencies; but that is because it has been messed about with so much over the centuries.

      Parts of the NT were writtten for political purposes, but the original texts were probably Gnostic in origin. Indeed, Paul was probably a Gnostic. Those original texts contain eternal truths that have nothing to do with Christianity as it has been 'marketed' through the millennia. They are more to do with evolution of human concsiousness.

      It is possible to view Christianity in a completely different way from the literalist mumbo jumbo.