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Eric's Sunday Sermon; Asking For Help

Updated on September 17, 2016

On what miracles do the heavens open up?

It is said that God is more pleased with a prayer for help, than a prayer on thanksgiving.
It is said that God is more pleased with a prayer for help, than a prayer on thanksgiving. | Source

A hard life of choice

There was a man of some age that had literally never asked another for help. Even as a child. One could say he asked for help from doctors from time to time but not really, he simply engaged their services and paid them for it. And for sure this man believed in his God. But he felt it selfish to ask his God for anything. He actually rose to a level where he got people to do things for him, but these were orders and not requests. He literally never found the need to say please and thank you. We could call the man self-sufficient.

There was another man that went to war and also lost his wife to tragedy. He moved into the wilderness. He lived as a hermit and had no need to communicate with others. Everything he needed he provided for himself. He never asked another for help.

And yet another man, who early in life became addicted to the powerful drug of alcohol. Somehow the man kept living but he was miserable and stuck in a world of hurt and anguish that never could be soothed. He simply could not reach out for help.

And then somehow, almost miraculously all three men changed. Something in common happened to all three. Not a lightning bolt, not even a vision from God. And certainly not anything the men were looking for in their lives.

If we look hard at these men we see rather sad lives. If we look at ourselves we see some of us in each of them. Or is that that we see some of them in ourselves? Many of us have a streak in us that causes us to say “I can do it myself”. And even a part of us that says “I can do it better than anyone”.

Let us pause here and consider what is said of a doctor or a lawyer who has himself for a patient or a client. I think the line suggests that they have a fool for a patient or a client. Perhaps that is deeper than a quick line, joke or advice.

A union requires the asking and the providing of things in love.

My grandpa was a master carpenter. Wow he made me proud when he gave me a chore.

The finest technique to build another's healthy esteem is to ask them for help.
The finest technique to build another's healthy esteem is to ask them for help. | Source

Stooping is not so good, stooping to raise someone up is perfection of love.

It would seem to me that most of us have delayed asking for help until it was too late, or at least a whole lot more complicated than if we would have reached out sooner. I will not admit to that dumb mistake when it comes to cars and dentistry ;-) OK I will admit that one time I toughed out for several months with a fairly large tumor growing inside me – and that dumb delay nearly cost my children their father. And that brings us to fathers.

(First a fun little side note. My 6 year old and I were kind of laughing at something his mom did that was peculiar. In her absence of course. I said at the end “I sure do love your mother” and then “how about you”. He responded “why wouldn’t I?” Good point)

Now as a father we want to help our children. Sometimes watching them go through growing pains is quite hard. But like the old line says “you got to know when to hold em and when to fold em”. With a child a good father must know when not to interfere. And then the tough part. If the child does not put effort into the task but asks for help, a good father must also know when to motivate but not “do for”. And along this line, a good father must support and teach the act of asking for help.

I know we are not getting back to the miracle that happened to the three men. Please be patient.

The helping out of a homeless person is almost never done because such a person asks for help. It is done because the need is known by someone who can and does offer help. No I am not dealing with panhandlers and beggars here which are really a very tiny part of our homeless. And on this diversion, I do recommend giving a dollar often.

We do not use a dishwashing machine. We are aware it may take more water doing them by hand, but it does not use electricity. Now my wife is quite competent to do the dishes. There are a few reasons that it would be better for her not to do them. She does not ask if I will do them. And it bothers her to have any sitting in the sink. So I do them and basically keep the sink clean. How trivial. Or is it. I do the task at hand without being asked to. My mom taught me to do that for women.

If a lady is approaching a door I hurry to open it. At the grocery store I return my carts and sometimes pick up some garbage and toss it. Do not think these things a virtue of mine. Helping in these respects was just beat into me before being a teen and for years afterward. “If you must be asked to do these things, Eric, they don’t really mean a thing”.

Just holding a child's hand is the asking and the giving.

Could asking be as loving as giving?
Could asking be as loving as giving? | Source

Put your hand in another's hand and ask

Please give another a special gift

Now there are two things we must talk about in asking for help. The first one is the benefit to the person asking for the help. Oh how cursed I am about allowing friends and family into my world of problems. It just does not seem right. Now there was another thing my mom pounded into my head. In presenting one’s self to others, one is clean, one is well groomed, one has a smile upon their face, one is respectful. And probably the most important thing is not to wear your problems on your sleeve. It is rude to burden another with your problems – and boy howdy that is triple true about family issues. Let me say about that: It is a two edged sword. Sure it helps you “succeed” in life and sure it can screw you up as sharing problems is one of the best cures. And unresolved resentments, and emotional pain that is not cured is real bad for you.

Well asking for help is a real good thing for the requester. Life is just too darned short to not share your burdens with others. One person and one person on a problem, is more than just two people. Here is a cool Bible verse that kind of hits on this point: https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew%2018:20 And of course we play the song above.

The second is the benefit to the person being asked. And here is the miracle for our 3 tortured souls we started out with. Sometimes in this world we need to feel needed. Whether it be a job, our community or our relationships. This preaching man gets way down on himself if he gets to feeling worthless. There is no better remedy for a troubled man than to be of service to others. There is nothing in parenting that compares to the joy in one’s heart than when a child asks for help and we do our best to help. A handout is well and good, but giving a hand up creates a connection with God and fills any void with love. Can helping others make a sick man well? Absolutely yes! Can a heart be filled with joyfulness in the act of responded to an prayer for help? Absolutely yes!

Oh for sure on this wonderful day that the Lord has made, help someone. And one of the finest ways to help another is to ask for their help. It is miracle what it can do for them. Help them be uplifted in reaching a goal of helping and loving their fellow man.

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    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Fuller 7 months ago from Southern Illinois

      There is nothing more enjoyable to me than giving to someone in need or writing something that will possibly lift someone's spirit. I have always found it difficult to ask for help, pride is a good thing but when you have too much, it's a bad thing. The words come to mind, " Pride goes before the fall. That was a favorite quote from my mother. I think when one grows up poor you take on an extra thick skin and determination to succeed, that's good, but there are times when we need help and admitting it is a good thing. You always make me think and that's a good thing....I read the passage and I firmly believe that, just two or three people can make going to church a blessing. Thank you Preacher man...

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 7 months ago from Olympia, WA

      I'm with you, buddy! I wouldn't be alive today if I hadn't asked for help....beautiful thoughts, my friend.

    • Jodah profile image

      John Hansen 7 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Haha, Eric, I also do the dishes and keep the kitchen clean (as best I can) without being asked. I just accept it as my job. Your sermons certainly help others without you having to be asked. Every one is relevant to me at the time I read it, so you are helping me.

      As a child, whenever adults asked me how I was I was taught to respond, "I am very well thank you, and you?" They were often amazed and my parents were praised for my impeccable manners. I can't even imagine most children responding in that manner, they often have to be prompted to even reply. Now I don't even know what that has to do with helping or anything..but something spurred that memory :) wonderful sermon as always.

    • ChitrangadaSharan profile image

      Chitrangada Sharan 7 months ago from New Delhi, India

      To help someone and to ask for help ~How beautifully explained by you!!

      We have to find little pleasures of life here only . Making others happy gives the ultimate happiness and satisfaction and takes us closer to the 'Divine ' .

      Thanks for sharing another wonderful sermon!

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 7 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Ruby I am quite happy isolating. But it has become apparent to me, that no matter my faults, I can still benefit some people by interacting with them. That good part of me is simply a gift. I just cannot find any justification for not sharing that gift with others. Usually that goes pretty well even with my empurfekshuns.

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 7 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Bill, I just had strange thought. If you just wrote a comment telling me I stink -- coming from you it would still help me. Some people simply always help others. It must come from a very special heart.

    • Carb Diva profile image

      Linda Lum 7 months ago from Washington State, USA

      Eric, this is a tough topic for me (and most people I think). I hate asking for help. I hate to admit how many times I've injured myself (and then crawled away to a corner to quietly lick my wounds) because I attempted a task that was beyond my capabilities.

      I told myself I was doing a good thing by not "bothering" others, but in retrospect it comes down to pride, doesn't it?

      Over the years I have been happy to see my daughters grow and gain knowledge and the ability to accomplish many 'grown up' things...but boy it sure makes me happy when either of them asks me to help them with something. Often it's something they could have accomplished on their own, but the comradery makes my heart sing.

      So when we don't engage those around us, who truly care about us, aren't we being selfish? It's like gift-giving. My favorite part of the Christmas gift exchange is giving to others. I could receive zero packages and be happy as a clam at high tide. But if that was my edict, then my daughters wouldn't be able to experience the joy of giving.

      By the way, there is nothing ungodly about this message. Just because you did not mention God's name in every sentence...He created us in His image. We are love, and that is what this sermon is (again) all about.

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 7 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      John, I wonder about that kind of upbringing. It may be that some shrink type folks would tell us it is not good to hide your feelings. Maybe they are right to an extent.

      But look how willing you and I are to share our deepest feelings through our writing. Some would banish us for doing so, creativeexciles comes to mind.

      I am very pleased that this struck a chord with you, thanks for helping me by letting me know.

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 7 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      ChitrangadaSharan, I am not completely without reservations about ultimate truths. But it seems to me, what you say here could be one. I would like to believe it is. Thank you.

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 7 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Linda, sometimes I run into the most wonderful things. And sometimes I just cannot quite describe them as they are almost heavenly. What you say about when our elder children ask for our advice, is one of those things. The joy it brings me is indescribable for me.

      My elder son asked me about a troublesome issue for him. What I did was thank him. He actually unintentionally gave me the blessing of knowing I was not the only one to have such a problem.

      As for that God thing in my sermons. I know a really lousy preacher. His sermons kind of are not good. Oh he quotes scripture very accurately. But he is truly a gift from God for how he loves others without falter. That to me is the word of God.

    • Faith Reaper profile image

      Faith Reaper 7 months ago from southern USA

      Beautifully written from your heart, as always, dear Eric.

      Oh, I'm so blessed when I know my Lord God loves for me to call on Him, because I sure do need Him daily. In that same regard, don't we love to be needed. You've made me mindful of that fact in reading here this day. So, thank you, Eric, for sometimes I can get in that mode of thinking I don't need help.

      I am reminded of the scripture when we go out weeping, we will come back blessed when we help others (paraphrasing, of course).

      We need each other!

      Peace and blessings

    • Dana Tate profile image

      Dana Tate 7 months ago from LOS ANGELES

      I like what Ruby said: "Pride goes before the fall" I have always been the type of person that would help others in a heartbeat but never asked for help. I made life hard on myself because I would not admit I needed help of any kind. It was seen as foolish pride, but that was just the surface. The root of my problem was I come from a family that despises weaknesses and neediness.

      I was taught that behavior, and it almost ruined me, but thank God for His mercy who always created beauty out of my ashes. I have become for the younger generation what no one was for me; a voice of reason, a compassionate ear and letting them know they don't have to carry their burdens alone.

      God has used me to break that generational curse in the younger family members that I will not be able to utilize with my generation and older which is unity in the family. Eric, your sermon's are always right on time for me and I have gotten to the point where I look for them in anticipation. God bless u and all that u do.

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 7 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Faith, thank you. I like when people paraphrase scripture and in so doing let us get a look into them also. I have know idea why but HP needed me to check that your comment was not spam.

      God puts so much joy in my heart when I pray (ask) of Him. That I know my Lord likes it. So I try to do it a whole lot.

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 7 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Dana I am blessed to have you relate your story a bit. We all are given that opportunity to do better for those who follow. Many do not take that road. Every old man I have known in his ending years has told me in some fashion that they regret that. When we live to brighten another's future we brighten our own and our Lord's.

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Isaac Weithers 7 months ago from The Caribbean

      Eric, when we for ask for help or for anything else, we give the giver an opportunity to receive a blessing. It takes some humility--and sometimes a little wisdom. Asking for help is a way to open up a dialogue for other reasons. Very good topic!

    • whonunuwho profile image

      whonunuwho 7 months ago from United States

      Wonderful sermon my friend. I know that from experience about asking, as well as helping other folks, too. Nice message. whonu

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 7 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Very well said Dora. Sometimes it just barely makes a difference why we reach out to others - it is the human connection that means so much. I think we do that here and it is good.

    • clivewilliams profile image

      Clive Williams 7 months ago from Nibiru

      pride? what pride?

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 7 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Hi Clive. Pride and Prejudice are two of my favorites. In order to condemn them one must exercise them.

    • Mel Carriere profile image

      Mel Carriere 7 months ago from San Diego California

      Sometimes the biggest harm is giving help when help is not desired. Part of maturity is knowing when to help and when to stay away.

      Your sermons are always edifying. I hope this hub does not ignite a firestorm of contentious comments, like your last one. I don't know how people can take exception to your healing words of peace.

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 7 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Ah Mel, there is this great legal precedent. This dude spoke against the regime. They caught him hanging out in a garden, arrested him with no warrant. They tried him and could not convict so they appealed on the basis of sedition. The dude could have walked had he followed his lawyers advice. So they went ahead and gave him a death penalty.

      There is a gal lingering around here that could never even be tried. But she could be legally sent to a psych hospital until well.

      Knowing when help will cause more harm than good is a mystery to me.

    • Mel Carriere profile image

      Mel Carriere 7 months ago from San Diego California

      I should have said Capitalized Contentious Comments, but I didn't think of it until now.

      Also, sometimes the people we want to help don't really need it, it is simply faulty perception on our part. That is when help is really just our arrogance of wanting people wanting to conform to our standards. Like,when we helped Iraq. That's what I meant.

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 7 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Hey bro -- kids in college up north? We have done that and I hope learned something from it. My idea of helping you may just be a freaking stumbling block.

      I helped my gorgeous and radiant mail lady to understand that she did not deliver my package in error. Ok - I admit it, it was just an excuse to interchange with a wonderfully unattainable unrequited love.

      Must I confess and repent -- ala Carter in my heart.

      Chargers are doing great -- dang does it mean a repeat of last week?

    • denise.w.anderson profile image

      Denise W Anderson 7 months ago from Bismarck, North Dakota

      "A handout is well and good, but giving a hand up creates a connection with God and fills any void with love." I have found this to be true in my own limited experience. In fact, I had a situation just today where someone came to me with a problem, and I helped them to see things from a different point of view. We both went away uplifted! The Lord gave us two hands and a heart to do his work, and the best way to help ourselves is to help others.

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 7 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Right On!! Denise. You make the world a better place by being you.

    • lawrence01 profile image

      Lawrence Hebb 6 months ago from Hamilton, New Zealand

      Eric

      One of the great lessons I learned in the Arab world was that the most important person in the world is the one in front of you!

      To them, time doesn't matter, what matters is the friendship right there and then. If a friend needs help, they may not ask for it, but you give it anyway!

      Great stuff

      Lawrence

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 6 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Lawrence thank you for that interesting comment. Just last week my elder son and I wanted to do the work for my eldest brother. We assisted but did not "do it". We laughed about it later as we both backed off without a word. Some people you have to be careful with. They would rather do it "right" than have you help.

      But in general our family rule is that if your hands are empty and another's are full. Help.

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