Horoscope Review: Cheapest Online Psychic, Pasqualina
Smells Like Bogus Astrology
"With her big dark eyes and her long hair, Pasqualina looks like an Ancient Goddess," says the copy under the "Generous Offer" menu item on Pasqualina.com. "Pasqualina" means "Easter's child" and her last name is supposedly "Sogni," Italian for "dreams." She is an email robot, a fake clairvoyant meant to appeal mainly to those outside of North America. Because of bad reviews, her "owner" removed the ads for lotteries that used to crowd her homepage, and renamed Pasqualina a "psychic astrologer" instead of a "clairvoyant." I hope you are not fooled.
Pasqualina's site is based in France, as are the sites of the notorious and openly fake "Sara Freder," "Jenna," and "Astrologer Mary." They are not women or even people. They are computers programmed to send you links to vague and lengthy computerized "free readings" -- Pasqualina's "Free Personal Horoscope" is 3600 words; here, see mine -- that are mainly sales pitches for paid readings which are also computerized.
Pasqualina wants your name, email address, and birth date so she can send you this free horoscope. After you send your information, which she swears is private, a confirmation number arrives in your email, and you are promised "I am going to prepare your Free Reading for you at the soonest." Bad spelling and grammar are her specialty, even in her ads; that ought to be enough to warn you right there.
While you wait you can peruse her "catalog" of four pieces of cheap-looking jewelry, like the "Magic Dolphin" promised to bring back a lost love, or the "Seven Planets Magic Medal" to make life "fantasticly beautiful for yourself, full of success and luck." Only $19.95!
What You See is What You Get
Pasqualina's Free Reading
After confirming my email address, in one week arrived my 3600-word "personal horoscope" which said NOT ONE WORD about the zodiac and named no planets, so it is not a horoscope at all. Pasqualina gave me three lucky numbers and three lucky dates, each a week to two weeks away, that will bring money and an important new person. She went on to claim that an upcoming Golden Seven-Month Period is coming, and she is "quite sure I am the only one able to help you effectively and without any mistakes on the path to HAPPINESS." Those who don't buy her services "risk to continue to live to the end of your days in a miserable existence, without having the least chance of seeing any change."
If I did buy, Pasqualina promised, along with riches, love, and complete joy, seven magical numbers for games of chance and the dates I must play them, predictions for my future, and "a long series of Mystical Ceremonies, called High Protection Ceremonies" that will increase my energy and luck 1000 percent.
If you are tempted to click through to the ordering page, you will learn that Pasqualina has one advantage over other robot psychics: She's the most inexpensive I've seen. You can get her First Predictions for $9.95, Complete Predictions for $19.95, or those plus your "Special Horoscope for the Future" for $29.95, with an optional "priority" fee of $5.90. The prices may tempt you, but they also guarantee that you will receive the same computerized readouts that everyone gets, with only your name inserted. You can pay in in full or in two installments, by credit card, wire transfer, or International Money Card, if you are foolish enough to pay at all.
Sylvia Sky, experienced astrologer, does not select or endorse the ads that appear with her articles. Copyright 2016 by Sylvia Sky.