How Seth MacFarlane Demolished Modern Civilization
I watched about five minutes of Family Guy on Fox once, but turned it off in a mixture of boredom and disgust. It's a horrendously badly done animation, but the quality of its cartooning cannot compare to the disjointed pretense for storytelling. However, that's certainly the least of its faults as creator Seth MacFarlane, aided and abetted by the unparalleled money-grubbing schlock-meister Fox owner Rupert Murdoch, has built a cheap cartoon into a billion-dollar franchise giving voice to the most repulsive, repugnant, inhuman, and profoundly anti-Christian, anti-Muslim, anti-Jewish, anti-Moral, anti-Everything nihilism which ordinarily would not have made it out of online wanker forums inhabited by zit faced 13 year old sullen goth children who hate everything.
Much to my chagrin, I simply could not resist the opportunity to watch this week's Family Guy episode titled "Not All Dogs Go to Heaven," as it was the first time since the end of Star Trek The Next Generation fifteen years ago that the entire cast of the original Enterprise-D would be together on a television program. I expected all sorts of Star Trek in-jokes about socially-inept Trekkie nerds wearing pointy ears, (as that fantastic sitcom The Big Bang Theory does so well) and the beginning of the episode seemed to deliver on the promise as the Family Guy family visits a local Star Trek convention. It was there, right at the beginning, that it seemed as the show was derailing, as one of the first jokes regarded William Shatner's late wife, with an ample wink to the possibility that he drowned her. Again, much to my chagrin, it was way downhill from there.
I had tuned in to see the TNG crew make fun of itself. Unfortunately, the entire episode featured the cast with just a few lines, mostly centering around truly insipid, irrelevant, nonsequitor, childish potty humor, which was (as Simon Cowell loves to say) a complete and utter waste of time. It turned out that the Star Trek cast's participation was only a meagre subplot, promoted to pull ratings for the main plot, which was, very simply, the single most offensive thing I have ever witnessed in all my decades of watching television.
- One of the titles on a Christian bookburning pile is "Logic for First Graders"
- A dog fetches and chews on a crucifix
- God is Flash Gordon on a Star Wars Speederbike
and worst of all
- Jesus is going to date rape a woman
Although I was born a Catholic, I am not a practicing Christian in any way, shape, or form. I have an appreciation for all major religions, and see them all as being different and equally valid vectors towards humans comprehending the divine mysteries. But this episode of Family Guy literally made me gag. More important than my own retching reaction has to be the fact that Seth MacFarlane is certainly no stranger to offending everyone and everything, as is clear in an episode where a character dances around a dying AIDS patient singing "You've Got AIDS", and he is a hero to millions of viewers!
In "North by North Quahog", Jesus in engaged in a car chase shootout with police.
In "The Father, the Son, and the Holy Fonz", holy water is infectious and causes disease.
In "Stewie Loves Lois", a child prepares to murder his mother.
In "Barely Legal" a woman has sex with a dog taped to a chair.
In "No Meals On Wheels", an Adolf Hitler scarecrow is named a "Scare-Jew".
In "I Dream Of Jesus", Christ walks across water to get a dollar bill.
In "Family Gay", a ten person orgy is clearly shown.
In "McStroke", pedophilia is clearly shown.
There are lots more pornographic, racist, derogatory, and disgusting examples, but you get the drift.
Here is the crux of the issue. Although he is by far not the most vehement violator of human values, morals, and sanctity in this world, Seth MacFarlane is one of the most blatant and visible. Through the profoundly mistaken assumption that anything that makes money and doesn't land you in jail is fair game, Fox has given this callow, puerile, Neanderthal ignoramus a worldwide soapbox where millions of impressionable anti-social youths can find catharsis in the realization that they are not alone in their beliefs that "everything and everyone sucks," as Stewey (the talking homosexual baby) actually acts out their innermost fantasies: matricide, pedophilia, orgies, anti-Semitism, bestiality... Jesus Christ? Jews? AIDS sufferers? Kick them all in the crotch and then laugh as they writhe on the floor! That's so funny!
Yeah. Funny. Really funny.
Baudelaire noted in 1864 that "the devil's best trick was to persuade you that he doesn't exist," and although my own personal theological construct does not include an anthropomorphisized incarnation of duality, I do have to state that it is my most fervent and deeply held belief that the recent gleeful promotion and universal acceptance of every imaginable perversion and immorality; along with what I call the Big 6 D's: debasement, debauchery, decadence, degeneracy, degradation and desecration; is not just unprecedented since Sodom and Gomorrah, but is the clearest sign (whether you want to incorporate it into an eschatological thesis or not) that this civilization is on its last legs.
Since it seems we live in an age where the only effective way to be able to communicate any concept to a fellow human being is to use current media cultural references, I would like to quote Al Pacino as Satan in "The Devil's Advocate":
Who, in their right mind, could possibly deny the twentieth century was entirely mine?
We're done. Stick a fork in us. And it is the Seth MacFarlanes of the world that have done the sticking. Some more apropos commentary from Al Pacino's brilliant portrayal of the devil:
You sharpen the human appetite to the point where it can split atoms with its desire. You build egos the size of cathedrals. Fiber-optically connect the world to every eager impulse. Grease even the dullest dreams with these dollar-green gold-plated fantasies until every human becomes an aspiring emperor, becomes his own god. Where can you go from there? As we're scrambling from one deal to the next, who's got his eye on the planet? As the air thickens, the water sours, even bees honey takes on the metallic taste of radioactivity... and it just keeps coming, faster and faster. There's no chance to think, to prepare; it's buy futures, sell futures.. when there is no future. We got a runaway train, boy. Every one... is getting ready to fistf*ck God's ex-planet and lick their fingers clean, as they reach out toward their pristine, cybernetic keyboards to tote up their f*cking billable hours.
Seth MacFarlane, I am singling you out because in another age you would be convicted to death by stoning and, in another age, I'd be proud to cast the first stone. In this "enlightened" age, with its "finer" sensibilities you do not deserve death. However, you profoundly deserve what to you and your fellow civilization-demolishers is even worse: Total obscurity and disregard as the benighted cretins you are.