How to Fly (Mentally Speaking)
Almost Making It, Almost Breaking It
Did I ever tell you about the time that I almost made it to perfect peace, enlightenment and possibly eternal salvation and then falling downwards towards a "Hell" in which my very soul would become "possessed" by something else? Well, here goes.
There are two frequencies which we are able to "tune in" to all around us as I write this. One is fast-repeating, stimulating and VERY dangerous. The other is slow and sounds exactly like an operatic peeling of Angel's Voices. The first sounds like this: ee!ee!ee!,ee!ee!ee!. This one is the defalt frequency for you unless you choose to listen for a LONGER-SYLLABLED ear-ringing code. You turn ee!ee!ee! into eeeeeeeeeeeeee,eeeeeeeeeeeee,eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. You can draw it out into one long eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee........but this seems to cause another thing to happen. You hear this sound like a Bell: Bong, Bong, Bong, Bong, which instinctively gives me the impression that something very HUGE is about to happen. It could be a good thing OR it could be really awful.
I had written some things that caused me to receive an extremely high dosage of what I'd call Bi-Readable Energy. If you DON'T draw out the syllables, it feels just like you are going to die. Your mouth becomes amazingly dry, your abdomen pulls up into your body, you feel afraid to be around other people because they seem very frightening. This took place at a time that I was running out of Anti-stress medication. This made my mind MORE SENSITIVE to whatever-this-energy-is that is always present in varying degrees.
When you get this desperate, you can lie down and tune in to the "salvation frequency" ee!ee!ee! becomes eeeeeeeeeeeeee,eeeeeeeeeee,eeeeeeeeeeeeee becomes longer and longer until you hear this "Tolling of the Bell". I swear that this is the heralding of God's Kingdom coming to Earth. For me, this is very frightening, not because it might kill me.........but because it might kill people I Love who have chosen to be part of this huge organization that picks on non-members. I decided to take it further and I actually could see a light at the end of the tunnel!
And I wouldv'e taken it, too except my mother intervened and called an ambulance. As soon as I made the choice to come out of this "higher mental state" and communicate with others, something went terribly wrong. I refused anything that would have calmed me down (a HUGE mistake). They gave me something else which caused a horrible psychological reaction. As I was rolled out to the car, I heard a "New Earth Mud" tune that goes: "In a Black Limousine........she exits". The nurse pushing my cart said: "Oh, look.....your getting into that Black car over there".
From the time i got into my mom's car, something began to take hold of what I perceive to be my consciousness. When we got home, it was 100 times worse. I felt Evil, Black Vibes all around me gripping me like a net from which there was no escape. Imaginary scenes of becoming a womanly whore for Satan thrashed me relentlessly. I was going to sleep in a new room. DON'T do this. You need to be somewhere that is familiar to you. My legs wanted to move yet stay still all at once. Same for the arms. The whole body writhes like heck.
Now, this is how I escaped. I went downstairs, took the last of my anti-stress medication..........and went to sleep. That is all it took. When I woke up, I was weak......but I knew that I'd make it now. I obtained a prescription-drug-regimen(Clonopin/Abilify/Trazodone) for my social anxiety disorder and my insomnia and promptly began to feel better around others. You still feel very weak and you have to not push yourself, mentally-speaking and GRADUALLY use less anti-stress meds so that your mind gets stronger again - not just dull and happy because you perceive a whole lot less. Stay on it, though - but never use too much or it can lead to the sequence of events previously described.
Now I want to tell you how my Grandma died. She had Alzheimers (seemingly) and could barely remember any of us. Right before she died, she had a STROKE which actually restored almost all of her mental functioning. It partially paralyzed one arm. Now, with the ability to know people, think and respond.........this woman chose to die. How could this be so? Grandma never backed down and would win out in any fight. She forcefully pushed any food away and stated that she was choosing not to eat. She died within a week.
Want to hear a theory about this? Well, all this God vs. Satan stuff happens to you when your mind is compromised in some way or other. You are ULTRA-SENSITIVE to all things around you (including this "energy" I keep talking about). So perhaps this energy kills people who fight and saves people who are very, very peaceful. If you FIGHT, it only wraps you in a cocoon of paranoia that leads you closer and closer to SOMEPLACE YOU DON'T WANT TO EVER WIND UP. My grandmother CHOSE DEATH before going to this place. If you RELAX and remain perfectly still, this energy doesn't hurt you.....it seems to enlighten and PERHAPS be a way to experience Heaven itself. It also means that if you go into this light, you may be terminating your physical existence. Decisions, decisions OR something that makes the mind less sensitive to this energy......namely a prescription drug regimen like mine.
The irony is that whatever-this-is only can happen to someone at the edge of a break with reality. I personally think many people have been broken/re-trained to be different in some way or other. It's like American Voodoo and man has it gotten around. One-by-one, people are stressing out repeatedly, being deprived of sleep (just make pops and pings on their house) and being PUSHED over-the-edge into some kind of group-mind. Does it exist or doesn't it? It all depends how you WANT to see it. If you INSIST that reality IS what it WAS, you are safe.
I'm a mentally-sensitive person, but stable enough to take a pounding and live to tell you about it. This inevitabley leads to the question: Have we built a technologically-mediated Heaven/Hell right here on Earth to separate the "good apples" from the "rotten ones"? I personally think so. Look around: certain people used to scream with delight, passionately display their affection in public, get into fights and be REALLY LOUD. Where did all these people go? Well, I think that either they "flew" (and became aware of the dangers around them) or FELL (they got so freaked out that they had a psychotic break and got "connected" to this "invisible group" that let's you know when you are being too impulsive, selfish, greedy, lustful or violent.
The first reaction is to rebel and over-exaggerate whatever-it-is that you are doing "wrong". It doesn't pay, that is for sure. As for me, I've decided to become a peaceful advocate for the mentally-unstable. This is not only abuse of the mentally-ill, it's the stressing-out of the healthy to MAKE them mentally-ill. I think that if you get caught up in this "psychic Infection", you have to do/think/act EXACTLY what you are told. Many a cult has turned the un-willing into a convert. Look at the Americans droning confessions and swearing loyalty to communism. Anyone remember that? So this group is sort of like that, except their EVERY action is micro-managed by someone else, giving them a TOO PERFECT AND MISSING SOMETHING LOOK.
My Grandma chose Death, I almost chose what I thought MIGHT be death to escape the talons of this mind-wrenching/re-educating machine. Luckily, I take medications that make this group utterly invisible. No problem.........I can live like this. The people who wouldn't be caught dead seeing a psychiatrist are also the ones getting majorly SCREWED. Having screwed-up thoughts? Go talk to a Psychiatrist. Whether the "harassment" is real or an internally-based phenomenon is IRRELEVANT because normalcy of mind can be achieved by chemically bringing you a safe way of seeing the world around you. So.........don't become an "American Idiot", go see someone to give you Abilify and Clonopin (which you must NOT ABUSE).......and Trazodone as a non-addictive sleep aid. Reality REALLY still is REALITY (even if a huge group no longer believes this). So stick to your guns (peacefully) and do not give up seeing things as NORMAL. It's safe here.....plus, it's the truth.