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Loosing My Number One Fan

Updated on January 16, 2010

My hubs have gone well,

It's easy to tell,

Most christians have hatred cause their beliefs do quite smell.

But my throat feels a swell,

And my tears fill a well,

For the loss of my fan who teaches about hell.

Twas the first to endorce me,

His teachings were what cohersed me,

Why he left I can't explain, I thought he joined to support me.

I remember his mug, sat right at the top,

I saw it each day looking holy and smug.

Now the name as it were?? My recall has been spent,

The first is a Blur and the last rhymes with Bent.

Our best exchanges regarded salvation, as he is a heller.

For I proved his deafness and blindness were like that of Hellen Keller.

So he refused my postings, for exposing his false dung mound,

To him, saving all mankind would make jesus a weak clown.

Now my heart and mind are spent,

For what's his name? Hint? Ent? Or Get Bent??

But there will remain no truth in the writings and plan,

Of the very first whom I call, MY NUMBER ONE FAN!!!

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    • profile image

      ruffridyer 

      7 years ago from Dayton, ohio

      Getting a little testy are we hell no.

    • LoveSoftly profile image

      LoveSoftly 

      8 years ago

      Hell NO..You'd better repent over that one..I smell a lawsuit!

    • profile imageAUTHOR

      Hell N0 

      8 years ago

      I know of this Dr. Bowflex, she screams grap me a cotex,

      She's a proctologist but mostly, her butt's the size of a T-Rex.

      Her partner in crime happens to be the Church Lady,

      Her beliefs and theology are quite shady,

      She insists that to be saved, requires one to pay their tithes daily.

      But for those who don't fret, get ready for the fire,

      Cause Church Lady has a blow torch she will use once you expire.

      She waits down in hell, for your live corpes to fall,

      She then yells told ya the lord don't play, I done warned you all.

      Then she lights up the torch, and lets the fire loose,

      She sends the flames mightely, right up your anoooose.

      You scream please let me go, I will warn that hell lurks,

      That's when she says, I told you to "get your ass to church!!!"

      But the Dr. she can save us with her Proctol jesus Machine.

      Once incerted into your butt hole it will send the jesus juice right toward your spleen.

      But she needs your money, your hard earned cash,

      Cause Little Davie, yall's son, has an evil plan for that stash.

    • profile image

      Hell Master 

      8 years ago

      Roses are red, violets are blue, my name is Hell Master so what's it to you. I come in the name of Church Lady Wattkins. I dint pay my tithes, the money I tried to hide. Forgeting I spent my earnings with women of the night, I had none left to pay my tithes. Thats how I ended up in hell and Dr. Bowflex had my baby.

    • profile imageAUTHOR

      Hell N0 

      8 years ago

      No worries roy d. I just had to " " Vent " " over the departure of. . . . . . .. .what's his name???

    • profile image

      Ast 

      8 years ago

      lol@Roy d. xD

    • LoveSoftly profile image

      LoveSoftly 

      8 years ago

      Don't worry about Hell NO, there Pogo..God's on his side and if God be for us who can be against us, right?

      Roy d...you made me laugh, buddy!!

    • roy d profile image

      roy d 

      8 years ago

      Hell No, its gonna be okay.

      We can get a little bent, or have a lot of dents, but its all good in the long run. We are subjected to vanity(bents) and evil(dents)to humble us.The riddle is in the rhyme, except its not a riddle, but its a fact that his followers can fit into the rhyme, or be bent with a whole lot of dents like a bunch of cars with hail damage.

    • profile image

      TizPogo 

      8 years ago

      So sorry for your pain. Hard for me to imagine a person, once knowing the truth, could ever go back (to hell). For me, the study of the truth of scriptures has become a part of me; it is part of who I am. "Love ME or I'll condemn you to an eternity of torture unimaginable" are not the words of my God. Even Christ had disappointments in some. But, as you know, it is our Father who gives us eyes to see and ears to hear. Continue to love and pray for all. You can can speak but the only ones who can hear are those to whom God has given sight and hearing. Love and peace, Pogo

    • LoveSoftly profile image

      LoveSoftly 

      8 years ago

      That really brought a tear to my eye...

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