Many of our worries do not happen at all
How to live the life joyfully?
What baffles human beings throughout the globe? It is the constant agitation of the mind which leads to depression and anxiety. Nowadays from KG student to grandpas, every one complains about tension or worry in one way or other! What is really anxiety? It is a form of fear about the future! Observing the present circumstances and environment, everyone become apprehensive of their future. There seems to be no security in our life. Yes, several factors contribute to our anxiety in day to day life. 1.Scant resources or money to get basic needs like, food, drinks, medicines, transportation, petrol and gas, other services for which we have to pay like electricity bill, telephone and internet bills, grocery, clothing, fees for Doctors, and many kind of taxes levied by the local authorities for supply of gas, drinking water and electricity.
In addition, due to wrong policies in economic front, the governments everywhere are facing rebuke from the consumers and common citizen. Long ago Dale Carnegie has written three beautiful books wiz 1. How to stop worrying and start living? 2. How to win friends and influence people? 3. Public speaking. In fact, when Dale Carnegie first tried his hands as a salesman, he was an utter flop! He was making mistakes after mistakes while dealing with customers. He became so depressed and thought that sales career is not suited to his mental makeup. Since he needed money to survive in an hostile world, he broke his head to find out ways to succeed in any career. He thought of a plan. He started recording his mistakes and failures daily in a note book. The note book grew in size to alarming proportions. But one good decision he made was, ‘not to repeat the same mistakes once again”. He reviewed the file named by him as ‘foolish things I have done”. In course of time, he was perfecting slowly in human relationship, salesmanship and public speaking. These are essential for all people to survive in a world of cut throat competition!
Out of his experiences came wisdom and he started recording the factors which led to his win in all the three essential human relation programs. Those three books were instant hit. There were many persons like him, sullen, lacking the confidence unable to face the public or customers which led to communication gap. The book was sold in millions like hot cakes. The books were translated in all major languages of the world and a great Institute has born out of the success of his ventures. The Carnegie Milan Institute thus guided many prospective business men and professionals in the art of Public speaking. How the unsuccessful man created history in human relationships? He knew that he was wrong in his approach to the customers. Most of them shut the doors in his face! This led to his introspection on ‘why he failed to evoke response from customers? Thus he found that everyone needs respect or recognition whether they purchase anything or not?
I have read those beautiful books and was completely won over by his philosophy of human relationship! I would recommend everyone to read those beautiful books. Of course, many of you might have read those books.
I will give a gist of important things he has mentioned on ‘worry’ which is the deep malady affecting one and all. 1. 99% of our worries never happen at all. We unnecessarily become anxious over things that may never happen! 2. To avoid worry and anxiety, one should live in ‘air tight compartments which mean, we should take one task at hand and deal with it alone. Only after the completion of that particular task, we should take the next task. 3. Prioritize the tasks as per urgency. 4. Deal the urgent tasks first and take up other tasks afterwards. 5. If you are a salesman, be courteous to greet your customer, smile genuinely and appreciate something about the customer or the house in which he lives. The appreciation should be genuine and It should not be made for just attracting the customer. 6. Never talk about the product which you would like to sell. If you are genuine and true, the customer will be attracted naturally to your conversation and he or she will be tempted to ask for the product you would like to sell. He has mentioned several episodes. I will narrate one or two here. One day Dale was standing in a long “Q” in a Post office. The people have become upset about the long wait. The person at the counter was grudging for the monotonous and repetitive task every day. As soon as Dale approached the counter, he greeted the person in the counter “Nice morning” and appreciated her hair style. It was a genuine appreciation. The counter girl looked up at Dale and beamed a smile. Oh! Thank you! Nobody has ever greeted me or appreciated my hair so far! Really it was a tonic for the counter girl and Dale Carnegie enjoyed her happiness! This is how in small things, he poured his heart to make others smile not through humor but by genuine appreciation.
I was a champion worrier during my young days due to pathetic environment in family. I worried for each and everyone in the family but never bothered ‘how my constant worrying make me more dejected? After reading “How to stop worrying and start living, I altered my mental aberrations little by little and slowly improved little by little. My advice to youngsters and even elders is simple. 1. Never brood over things which you can’t change like the family environment and paucity of resources. Instead try to accept the environment in which you are put and work out slowly to improve your relationship with others by selfless love, humility and other positive ways. Never bear any grudge towards any since our life on earth is only brief and why should we become morose and make others miserable? 2. Spread smile everywhere. Look at the brighter side of things 3. Be optimistic about life. Even if you fall few times, you can always rise up relying on your inner strength which is nothing but god. 4. Selfless love works wonders and hence love one and all. 5. If possible, help your distractors by loving them and forgiving them. Do not bring into your memory, the harms done to you by others. Wish them well and send your love to them. By practice you can become perfect in any field provided you try your hand. Do not think that something is impossible for you. Start and proceed slowly. The world is a great University where you can get all lessons! 6. Be grateful to your chosen god and pray to him sincerely for all the gifts he has blessed you with! Many times, we never count our blessings!