Men of Proverbs 31
Who is her husband
This chapter is usually described as passage of scripture describing the qualities of a good wife but there are two verses that give us a good description of who her husband is. That description though few in actual words speaks volumes about the man.
Her husband has full confidence in her (11)
What these 7 words say about the husband is that he considers his wife to be intelligent, capable, trustworthy and reliable. It tells us that he has good judgment and is not looking only at the physical rewards of marriage or how ‘hot’ his wife is but looking at her as a complete woman who has talents, gifts and as an equal.
Having full confidence in his wife, this husband does not have to worry for he knows his children and his home are in good hands. He also knows that he will not be distracted by questionable behavior by his wife for her faithfulness is accepted without question and she gives him no reason to question her character or behavior.
Who he is
The second verse gives us a better look at his character.
Her husband is respected at the city gate where he takes his seat among the elders of the land (23)
To be respected a man must be intelligent, of sound mind, good judgment, honest, trustworthy, fair, just and wise. Along with having proper knowledge and understanding coupled with using mercy when it is needed.
The man isn’t a womanizer, flirt, thief, or any other type of character with a less reputable personality. He treats his wife and family well, not lying to or cheating on them and he provides for them like he should. As the rest of verse 11 says, ‘and lacks nothing of value’ neither does his wife or children.
The key word in that verse is ‘value’ for it limits what the family possess. The word doesn’t mean that they lack nothing and get everything that their selfish desires want. No, it means that they know the difference between those possessions that hurt a family and those things that have real value and opt for the latter.
They do not waste resources pursuing those items which bring little to the family unit. In other words they do not chase after the latest fad in fashion or toys etc., but seek those things that really matter.
Some final words
No those two verses referring to the husband only take up 25 words out of the whole chapter but they tell us exactly what type of man is the husband of the noble wife. The marriage union isn’t a one way street where the wife does it all while the man sits in his den barking out orders to her and expecting her to do the impossible while he enjoys his life.
The husband has to do his share as well and be the man this type of woman wants to be married to. Ephs. 5:25 gives us 16 more words describing the duties of a husband towards his wife. Again, those few words speaks volumes as Jesus never lied to the church so a husband should not lie to his wife. Jesus did not flirt with other religious organizations so the husband should not flirt with women who are not his wife.
The message to husbands can go on but these two will suffice as an example for men who can continue to compare how Jesus treated the church with their own treatment of their wives.
Being biblical is not only a woman’s job, it starts with the husband and he needs to set the example honestly. He has his duties given to him by God and he needs to stop making excuses for not fulfilling that responsibility
© 2019 David Thiessen