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My Mystical Experience with Wisdom
I grew up in the Christian faith studying the Bible and attending church on a regular basis. I never had any supernatural happenings or anything remotely other-worldly occur in my simple life. I just made a decision to follow God. I lived a normal existence. It was pretty cut and dry.
I chugged along in my Christianity for a good ten years when all of a sudden God ambushed me. At the time I didn't think the experience was from God. It seemed so strange. Why I discounted it as from the hand of God was because of my thick religiosity that kept my understanding of God in a hermetically sealed box. God, in my mind, had to follow my understanding of the Scriptures; any deviation was looked upon as heresy. You could say I was spiritually constipated.
It was 1993, America was still experiencing the euphoria of Desert Storm and the meteoric 'kaching!' of Wall Street wealth. It was a pretty heady time. I had just gotten married and was excited about diving into the restaurant field as a chef and future owner of my own bistro in Waikiki. I was pretty idealistic. As I proceeded down this road, I sensed God blocking my way. I tried to push through, but I had a nagging sense that God closed this door. So I took off from work and prayed.
For three months I heard 'nada'. Then one stormy night in the fall of said year, I went to sleep amidst the booms and crashes of thunder and lightning. It was pretty frightening. The enormous mango tree in our backyard shook furiously in the tempestuous winds. I awoke at about 3:00 AM and saw a golden woman walking into my room. Her yellow hair flowed upward with sparkling dust dancing up into the air. She glowed. Holiness, joy, love, and peace exuded from her. She walked up to me and placed her hand on my heart and I immediately fell to the ground laughing with warm oil flowing up and down my body. She picked me back up again and zapped me once more with the warm oil treatment. I continued to laugh uncontrollably. She then picked me up (she was strong) and said, "Go and be the evangelist that I called you to be!" She pushed me forward.
I said, "No! I don't want to be like those goof balls on TV!" She didn't say a word, but I could hear her words in my spirit, "Not like that." Then I saw her bandaging wounds on people's bodies and taking care of the sick. I fell back to sleep and woke up blown away by the whole experience. I initially discounted it because there were no women angels in the Bible (I told you I was constipated). I thought, "It must have been a pizza dream." However, my pastor, who had enough wisdom to discern the hand of God, told me to ask God to confirm the dream.
For three months I sought the Lord and received 'nada' again. God seems to like to test our patience. He makes us wait. Then on Thanksgiving 1993 a friend from Porto Rico who I had not seen for five years called me out of the blue and said he needed to see me. He had stopped over on Oahu for eleven hours and was headed to Maui, but said he needed to see me because he had something important to share with me. He drove all the way from the airport to my home to share about his supernatural experience. It was the missing piece of the puzzle in my weird experience. He recounted a story of him having a dream of me sharing the Gospel of Jesus Christ with him; that he needed to come to know Jesus the next day.
He went to church that Sunday in San Juan and the pastor after the service walked up to him, without knowing about his dream, and said, "You had a dream and you need to come to know God today!" My friend, Guillermo, fell to his knees, cried like a baby, and received Jesus into his heart that morning. His dream and conversion confirmed my supernatural experience. I was called to be an evangelist. I couldn't believe it. We hugged and laughed amidst a table filled with cold turkey and stuffing. It truly was a mysterious and exciting Thanksgiving.
I took these strange events and laid them before God in prayer. I was then directed to go to seminary – the last place I wanted to attend. My journey took me to Massachusetts and to the office of my Old Testament professor who helped me solve my theological dilemma with female angels. I still struggled with it.
He was not one of your normal run-of-the-mill professors who just taught Hebrew and other esoteric disciplines. He also moonlighted as an exorcist and prophet on the weekends (he was a pretty interesting person). He, of all people, would understand my dream and experiences.
I knocked on his door only to have him ignore me for the longest time. The guy was an introvert. He finally opened up his tomb and let me in. I shared my dream and he said, "Let us pray and ask God what it means." He finally broke the silence, "It was God's wisdom!" The light bulbs went off in my head. I thought, "God's wisdom!!! She was beautiful! She was holy!" I finally had my answer to the constipated, theological conundrum that plagued my thinking for months. God's wisdom is portrayed as a she in the Bible, specifically the book of Proverbs. In my encounter, Wisdom was a woman, holy, loving, and powerful, all of them character traits of God. It all fit.
After I graduated from seminary I immediately went back to my old church in Hawaii and served as an assistant pastor for four years and a senior pastor for eight. I recently stepped down from my senior pastorate and moved into a teaching position within the same church. I have yet to see the fulfillment of my original calling. It's been over eighteen years. I have been humbled and broken during this time.
There was a moment in 2002 when I was ministering in Portugal when God visited me again. I had just fallen asleep in my hotel room when I woke up and saw the whole room turn into a 16th century world map. Then through the windows, Wisdom sitting on a throne came bursting through and startled me. I stood up in my bed and said, "Get out in the name of Jesus!" My roommate fell out of his bed in fear, yelling, "What happened?" I thought it was a demon or some evil spirit. The image dissolved and left the room. I was still constipated spiritually. I think she was telling me what I would be doing in the days to come. It was pretty amazing.
Since then there has been silence and no words from God in this area. I'm a teacher right now. It befuddles me. I believe the gifts and the callings of God are irrevocable. I'm still walking with God and trusting in Him. Doors for teaching are opening up. Ministry is flowing, but the evangelism thing is still a mystery. It will happen one day. God is never too early or too late. God bless you.