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Return Ticket From Hell

Updated on January 21, 2016

For the most part, i thought i was in heaven. I was greeted by this friendly guy who smelled like vanilla and had a bright spark emitting from his body. He stretched out his hand to me and said, "welcome to hell" I said "welcome to wha.....hell, excuse me sir but you have the wrong soul!" He laughed and looked at me and said, "Hell is not as bad is many people dream it up to be, and the choice is yours, you will be given a tour of the facility and you are free to indulge in any of the activities you choose. Then if you decide to stay, all you have to do is sign your name in the guest book and then its all fun from there on." So basically he gave me a chance to spew and view hell and then decided if i wanted to stay or go to heaven. Ok, i decided to take a peak in hell and see where all the fire was blazing. He opened a huge gate just like what many Christians would call the pearly gate and i couldn't believe my eyes what was beholden to them.

It was a huge magnificent looking city that was made out of gold. My eyes had never seen such beauty before, the sparkles, the cleanliness, the fresh air caressed my aching lungs. "What!" I shouted, "am i dreaming? there is no way this could be hell" "Yes it is he replied, lets go see" He held out his and and took mine and i felt like a child protected. There were people walking all over in beautiful colored clothing almost looking unreal. Animals were living together peacefully, it was almost like a clone of what heaven called paradise. He took me to what he called a "gentleman's club" and i was shocked beyond my years! "What the hell!" i shouted. He laughed and said, "Yes! what the hell". It was as though i had moved off the yellow glimmering streets into a strip club. There were women of every nationality and the men were enjoying themselves. "How can this be i asked?" "In hell, you are given a life time of pleasure and fun, nothing is good or nothing is evil in hell, we do as thou wilt."

I Began To Like It In Hell

I was there, shocked, happy, laughing and chatting with this man i knew nothing about. "So who are you?, i asked. "And why did you bring me here?" "I am nothing but a messenger of the prince himself. I help people make a choice as to whether they want to come here where its fun and exciting and you get to continue living your life as you did on earth or go up to heaven where its all about rules rules and more rules." I stopped walking and held my hand on top of my head as my sight came in contact with a building so magnificent it was like reaching up to the heavens. "What is this building i inquired?" Oh, this is where our guest stays until they decide to be permanent residents, then we move them over to something much more fiery! "Lets go inside," As i approached, the magnificent silver gates opened up, at the top of the gates there were 30 pieces of silver large medallions with what looked like the eye of Horus in the center. It was breath taking. I entered the compound and lust took me over, i wanted all what i saw, beautiful ladies swimming inside crystal clear pools, mouth watering foods being served, disco lawns where music pumped and people laughed dance and had fun, i couldn't believe that i was actually in hell.

I wanted it all, i wanted to stay, i wanted to stay in hell. He showed me to my room that night and i was tired as "hell". All the party, the drinks, the women were too much, and the good part is that you can do this everyday forever. I kicked off my shoes, threw down my body on a so comforting bed and fell asleep. Then i began to dream, i saw my wife who i loved so dear that had passed on three years ago after she lost the fight against cancer. "Dorothy!" i shouted as i rant to hold her.

"Frank, what are you doing here? what are you doing in this soul tearing place?"

"What are you talking about Dorothy? It has been so nice here, there is no crime, no illness, no racism, just fun and party, and you get to do that everyday honey"

"Frank, wake up, you have always told me to look deeper than the skin and i urge you to do the same, the devil is a liar and a cheat, hell could never be good. He is tempting you and promising you just like he tempted Jesus and promised him the world, a world which already belonged to his father. Now wake up frank, be strong, look deeper than the surface and walk in the right path. wake up frank, wake up frank, FRANK WAKE UP!"

I jumped from my sleep and looked around, my beloved Dorothy was not really here. Dorothy was an Angel of a person, if she did not choose to be in Hell, obviously hell is wrong.

Greeted By Satan's Agents At The Door

As i opened my door to find that "kind" gentleman who brought me here to question him and and decline his invitation to stay in hell, i saw several odd looking men waiting for me at the entrance of my room. "Can i help you?"

"The Guardian wishes to see you" They stared at me as thou they were soulless and just a shell. They took me down to the Guardian and he went straight into business. "Have you decided to stay in this wonderful kingdom?, please sign here"

"Sorry Sir, hell is a no go for me, it seems nice and all that but i think heaven may be the right choice for me" "WHAT! you imbecile, heaven is all lies, rules and worship, hell is fun, food, sex, do whatever you want and you choose heaven? He stood up and i could see fire began to emit from the top of his head, the city began to strip down from its golden beauty and was literally blood red, the people that looked all comfortable and happy transformed into what they really were, devils minions. The placed stenches of rotting and burning flesh and you could here death screaming continuously. As i turned and looked behind me i saw what looked like a demon beast rising from the earth, I was shaking all over, i cowered in fear and stooped and hid my head under my arm.

"Stupid fragile human, what has God ever done for you, why do you want to give him your soul?"

I suddenly felt a uplifting hand placed upon my shoulder and i looked around and saw Dorothy. She was shining bright like a star and this time she really had wings. I stood up and hugged her, i felt an energy and goodness ran through me like i had never seen before, and my eyes were opened.

I looked up upon the beast and saw that it had several flags in its hands, and upon its head it had several crowns and the tail of a dragon.

I began to proclaim. "Unclean beast, you are a lire, a murderer, a cheat and a killer of men. Your existence is only powered by the evil of mankind itself, you feed upon lust, fear greed, cowardice and selfishness. Today you find none of that in me. You have shown me that your promise of a similar paradise is false and is simply a lure for souls to feed your over zealousness ever since you were casted out of the heavens. You build empires on earth, you promote wars, famine and disease, all the things which depraves the human spirit and then you pitch upon them like a vulture and drain what little life they have left. Unclean beast, I am a son of God and therefore you are beneath me. Now get thee behind me and let me ascend". I could hear the beast scream and suddenly a tunneling light descended upon me and Dorothy, Then in the blink of an eye we were in hell no more.

"Thank you Dorothy, once again you have proven to be the pillar which i lean on. Are we now in heaven?"

"No Frank, I will be, but its just not your time yet. You have a job to do, a mission to accomplish. You must teach others about the tricks of Lucifer and enlighten them so they may see the truth and enlighten others, when your mission is completed, we will meet again." My eye were now open.


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    • Say Yes To Life profile image

      Yoleen Lucas 16 months ago from Big Island of Hawaii

      I couldn't resist: here's a joke:

      Here's a recruitment joke sent in to us by a member of our community:

      Tragically, Sally Mason, an HR manager was hit and killed by a 4×4 when she crossed the road while talking on her mobile.

      As her soul arrived at the Pearly Gates, St. Peter himself was on hand to greet her.

      “Welcome to Heaven,” said St. Peter. “Before you get settled in though, as with everyone, we’d like to give you the opportunity to experience both heaven and hell so what we’re going to do is let you have a day in each before you decide where you wish to spend eternity.”

      “Fair enough, although I’m sure I want to be in heaven”, said Sally.

      “But you’ve never been to hell so how would you possibly know?” And with that Ms. Mason found herself on a seemingly endless escalator descending to Hell.

      Eventually she arrived and the HR manager found herself stepping onto a beach of fine white sand, with deep blue water lapping at her feet and a bar with gorgeous waiter serving refreshing cocktails.

      Just beyond that she could see a luxury hotel and friendly faces welcoming her, many of them people she knew from her life as an HR consultant. They sat around, reminisced, laughed, swam and then as the bright golden sun disappeared below the horizon they all went into the hotel for an amazing meal.

      She even met Satan who was also very friendly, and not at all like the evil devil she had been led to believe he was. The evening was fabulous with more drink, jokes and dancing.

      Sally had a wonderful time in hell but all to quickly her visit came to an end and she was whisked onto the escalator to sample heaven. Everybody smiled and waved good-bye as she disappeared into the clouds.

      The escalator went up for what seemed like an age but eventually she arrived at heaven where St Peter was once again there to greet her.

      “OK, so now it’s time to spend 24 hours in Heaven” he said. Sally took her place amongst the clouds. Everyone was sitting around, chatting quietly, playing lutes and harps, and Sally joined in. People were pleasant but it was nothing like as much fun as hell.

      In fact the 24 hours seemed interminable but eventually it all came to an end and St. Peter came see her. “So,” he said, “you’ve experienced heaven and hell – where would you like to spend the rest of eternity?”

      Without hesitating Sally replied, “Hell – no question. I can’t believe I’m saying this because before I arrived I would have stayed in heaven without even visiting hell, but now that I’ve seen it I know that’s much more my kind of place. Heaven is fine, but I think I’m better suited to spending the rest of eternity in hell.”

      St. Peter nodded and escorted her back to the escalator which swept her back down, eventually, to hell, but when she arrived it was very different. Sally found herself standing in a hot, dry, putrid smelling wilderness. For as far as she could see all around was detritus, organic waste, and the stench of death.

      All her friends, old and new were dressed in filthy rags and were picking up scraps of rancid food to eat. Satan came up to her again and welcomed her.

      “I don’t understand,” sobbed Sally. “When I came yesterday it was fabulous food and drink, beautiful sun drenched sandy beaches and clear blue sea. Now all there is is a wasteland of putrid waste and everyone is scratching around for food.”

      The Devil looked at her and smiled, “that’s because yesterday we were recruiting you, but now you’re on the staff.”

    • clivewilliams profile image

      Clive Williams 20 months ago from Nibiru

      yes barine, so true

    • Barine Sambaris profile image

      Barine Sambaris 20 months ago from Nigeria

      The devil has always been a liar blinding people with vain and temporary things

    • clivewilliams profile image

      Clive Williams 20 months ago from Nibiru

      thank you frank

    • Frank Atanacio profile image

      Frank Atanacio 20 months ago from Shelton

      entertainingly interesting my friend Jive Clive... :)

    • clivewilliams profile image

      Clive Williams 20 months ago from Nibiru

      thanks for the comment savvydating.

    • savvydating profile image

      Yves 20 months ago

      Well done. You have captured the essence of evil's machinations, which manipulates us by appealing to our hedonism. You have revealed, in a clever fashion, how easily humans are deceived how how thouroughly demons lie. Fabulous job.

    • clivewilliams profile image

      Clive Williams 20 months ago from Nibiru

      We all have a Dorothy if we look deeper

    • Ericdierker profile image

      Eric Dierker 20 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Weird and glorious all at the same time. What a trickster that guy is! I think I got a Dorothy or two, at least I hope so.

    • clivewilliams profile image

      Clive Williams 20 months ago from Nibiru

      The devil is a liar.

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Fuller 20 months ago from Southern Illinois

      Wow! This is chilling. I know it is ' devilish ' but I'm glad Dorothy came to rescue you. Your imagination soars!