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Stop the Blame Game

Updated on December 15, 2017
Carola Finch profile image

Carola is a Christian writer and author of several books. She writes about Christian living, the Bible, relationships, and other topics.

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The blame game started in the garden of Eden and has been messing with our minds ever since. Adam was caught red-handed by God with a delectable piece of forbidden fruit in his hand. The juice was probably trickling down his chin as he quickly chomped and swallowed the evidence of his crime.

When God asked Adam if he he had been eating forbidden fruit, “The woman that you gave me gave me the fruit and I ate it,” he said. In other words, "Hey, you gave me this female. It’s her fault."

Eve bristled at this accusation. No way she was going to take the fall for this one. “The serpent deceived me, and I ate it,” she said. In other words, "the devil made me do it." Never mind that she has been staring at the tree with her mouth watering since she first saw it.

God saw right through Adam and Eve’s attempts to deflect responsibility for their actions and held them accountable for disobeying His instructions. Adam and Eve tried to hide from him without success.

As a consequence for their sin, Adam and Eve were banned from their home in Eden and forced to struggle to eek out a living from the land. Womankind was cursed with painful labor pains during childbirth (thanksa lot, Eve!).

Mankind has been pointing the finger at someone else ever since, just like Adam and Eve did in Genesis 3.

Blaming others is a typical human response when we are caught doing something wrong. There are many things we can also conveniently blame when we have to face the consequences of our life choices. Sometimes we blame our dysfunctional childhood, people who mistreated or abused us, or circumstances such as poverty or unemployment for our own sinful behavior and poor choices.

Blame is a convenient way to avoid taking responsibility of what we have done and facing the consequences of our actions.

Taking responsibility for our sins

God is righteous and holy. We cannot have a relationship with Him if we refuse to acknowledge our sins. When we play the blame game and say that our circumstances are someone else’s fault, we cut ourselves off from God and are barred from our spiritual Eden.

If we do not confess our sin and repent, we are weighted down with guilt and shame. Our health begins to deteriorate as the fallout of our sin begins (Psalm 38:3-6). We may find sources to blame not only to take the blame, but to alleviate our prodding consciences. We may suffer from sleeplessness, anxiety, and depression. Our physical health may start to deteriorate.

God is faithful to forgive our sins if we truly repent and ask Him for it. God promises that He will restore us to both physical and emotional health (Psalm 32:3-5, 65:2-4).

Accepting the consequences

When we eat whatever forbidden fruit there is in our lives, we can expect that there are consequences for our sin. We are deceiving ourselves if we, like Adam and Eve, think that we can hide from God and cover up what we have done. God knows our dirty little secrets. We pay a price when we sin.

The good news is, however, that our God is a loving, caring Father who will not only forgive our wrongs. He will help us deal with the destructive results of our sinful actions. When we accept responsibility for our sins, we can learn from them and will mature in our Christian walk.

"When you blame others, you give up your power to change"

Dr. Robert Anthony

Forgiving the people we blame

When we are constantly accusing God or others of crimes against us, we are stirring up anger, resentment and bitterness against them inside.

We may treat our human targets badly and speak cruel, nasty words to them. We may even concoct ways to take revenge on them. These negative emotions can cause a downward spiral that plunges us into deeper and deeper chronic stress and physical ailments. Instead of blaming, we need to forgive those we perceive as perpetrators and put the situation behind us by letting go of our anger and resentment.

We are sometimes in a bad situation that is someone’s else’s fault and we are an innocent party. Instead of pointing the figure of blame, we need to forgive them for what they have done, no matter what harm was done.

Source

Stop blaming, start living

We need to take a second look at the blame we place on others and accurately assess who is really at fault. In some we may may the innocent party, but in many cases, we should be blaming ourselves for most situations, where it often belongs.

References:

Holy Bible, New International Version
How to Take Responsibility & Stop Blaming Others (Even if Others are to Blame), SixWise.com
Have You Stopped Blaming Others For Your Problems? Keep Believing Ministries
Blaming Others, openbible.info


© 2013 Carola Finch

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