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The Hats

Updated on March 13, 2009
Trying on hats by cackhanded/flickr
Trying on hats by cackhanded/flickr

We are introduced to the hats at a young age. There is the best manners one, the endearing child, and the disciplined student. We learn to wear the hats to please others. Some times we wear them to get what we want or to just fit in. Later in life we try on the temptress, the rebel, and the athlete. We decide which hats we are willing to put on and which won't fit no matter how hard tug at them. As we mature we acquire the intellectual, the successful, the good Christian, the super mom, the understanding wife and the martyr. We go on like this through life until our rack is piled high and some hats forgotten, lay on the floor. Finally we reach an age where we take each hat and turn it over in our hands. They are too small and too obvious and too silly. No longer will we pretend to be. No longer will we conform. We will just be ourselves. Naked.

So here I am naked. Elbows on the table, irreverent and procrastinating. Lackluster, yielding and tired. Forgetful, complacent, spiritual ten times over but that old Christian hat can not contain me. Just Mom, understanding my own shortcomings. Hey what do you know, this Martyr hat still fits!

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    • Patricia Costanzo profile image
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      Patricia Costanzo 8 years ago from Behind the Redwood Curtain

      Thanks for stopping by Robert! I did a quilt like that with clothes from my whole family once.

      Niteriter put it back immediately! Nice to meet you.

    • Niteriter profile image

      Niteriter 8 years ago from Canada

      I don't know much about hats. I have just this one which I shoplifted from a linen store in a small northern California town a few days ago.

    • Putz Ballard profile image

      Putz Ballard 8 years ago

      Great hub, having three sons and me, we have had hundreds of hats. My wife even cut the patches off one of my son's old hats and used tthem in making a special one of a kind quilt.

      Robert Ballard

    • Patricia Costanzo profile image
      Author

      Patricia Costanzo 8 years ago from Behind the Redwood Curtain

      I think that song was in 9 1/2 Weeks, wasn't it? I'll go look and see if its the one I'm thinking of.

    • Tom Rubenoff profile image

      Tom Rubenoff 8 years ago from United States

      Reminds me of the Randy Newman Song, "You Can Leave Your Hat On"

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZNGgvpjtq0w

    • mayhmong profile image

      mayhmong 8 years ago from North Carolina

      LOL, I wouldn't be suprise.

    • Patricia Costanzo profile image
      Author

      Patricia Costanzo 8 years ago from Behind the Redwood Curtain

      Really May? Did this little ol' hub make blonde drop her drawers?

    • mayhmong profile image

      mayhmong 8 years ago from North Carolina

      Did I miss something?! A Hat, what's that? A funky junky hat.

      I can't believe BP didn't mentioned about being naked from reading this hub? LOL

    • Patricia Costanzo profile image
      Author

      Patricia Costanzo 8 years ago from Behind the Redwood Curtain

      Blonde, I'm not mush of a hat wearer either.  This hub is about the other hats we put on to please other people.  You are blessed if you don't mess with those either!

       

      Constant I'm aaaaallllll over it! 

    • Constant Walker profile image

      Constant Walker 8 years ago from Springfield, Oregon

      Hey, Just finished you music list hub!

    • blondepoet profile image

      blondepoet 8 years ago from australia

      I feel so left out here I adore hats but I have never had one or worn one,the only thing that comes close is my big floppy beach hat, which I no longer can find. Some women look so awesome in hats, I just always felt a bit strange wearing them.

    • Patricia Costanzo profile image
      Author

      Patricia Costanzo 8 years ago from Behind the Redwood Curtain

      Lgali, the literal ones, I assume you mean.

    • Lgali profile image

      Lgali 8 years ago

      good hub for summer time

    • Patricia Costanzo profile image
      Author

      Patricia Costanzo 8 years ago from Behind the Redwood Curtain

      Thanks for dropping in agvulpes. An Aussie Akubra? Might have to google that now.

      I went soft on Chris? What would be a hard hitting question?

    • agvulpes profile image

      Peter 8 years ago from Australia

      G'day Patricia , just dropped in after reading your interview with CR.

      You went soft on him, he must have softened you with his charm. :-)

      We seem to all have a Martyr hat don't we ? but have you tried the Aussie Akubra.? I am definitly becoming a fan of yours.

    • Patricia Costanzo profile image
      Author

      Patricia Costanzo 8 years ago from Behind the Redwood Curtain

      My heads too small, they usually look like that girl at the top!

    • AEvans profile image

      Julianna 8 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      Yes everyone wanted me back , I hope that I did not sound vane as I am not vane at all, so I hope it wasn't brash as I am definitely not like that. :(

      Patricia you would look good in hats, go hang out on the weekend and just try them on, it is a lot of fun. :)

    • Patricia Costanzo profile image
      Author

      Patricia Costanzo 8 years ago from Behind the Redwood Curtain

      AEvans, thanks for the thumbs up. I love hats on others... I see you've put yours back on!

    • AEvans profile image

      Julianna 8 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      I appreciate hats and when Princess Diana was alive she inspired me to become a hat person, I admit I have a few in my collection and where them with pizzazz!!! Thumbs up!!!:)

    • Constant Walker profile image

      Constant Walker 8 years ago from Springfield, Oregon

      Hey, check your email.  Sent you an importan messgae.

      PS:  I LOVE hats! ... and no, I have no balding issues.  I look really good (or so I've been told) in top hats exactly like the one pictured on this hub. But, I don't own one - yet.

    • Patricia Costanzo profile image
      Author

      Patricia Costanzo 8 years ago from Behind the Redwood Curtain

      Thanks sixtyorso. A lot of my stuff falls short of poetry, not sure what to call it.

    • sixtyorso profile image

      Clive Fagan 8 years ago from South Africa

      Nice analogy. Almost a blank verse poem. I am only into figurative hats. I don't like hats or caps much. If the hat fits wear it I guess! great hub.

    • Patricia Costanzo profile image
      Author

      Patricia Costanzo 8 years ago from Behind the Redwood Curtain

      Cris good for you if you can always be true to your authentic self, I'm jealous.

      CC next time remember to turn my light off!

    • profile image

      C. C. Riter 8 years ago

      How'd you know I was in your closet? I love that picture up there, cute

    • Cris A profile image

      Cris A 8 years ago from Manila, Philippines

      I've never taken to hats, figuratively and literally. thanks for sharing this nice analogy :D

    • Patricia Costanzo profile image
      Author

      Patricia Costanzo 8 years ago from Behind the Redwood Curtain

      Its only in one place, unless you've been in my closet.

    • profile image

      C. C. Riter 8 years ago

      Well it's really cute on you. Guess where I saw it. I know you can.

    • Patricia Costanzo profile image
      Author

      Patricia Costanzo 8 years ago from Behind the Redwood Curtain

      Thanks CC! That's my tequila 'drinking hat, one of only two hats I own.

    • profile image

      C. C. Riter 8 years ago

      I'll put it back soon, or maybe on another hub. thanks I like your avatar too and the blue cowboy hat i saw you in recently, you look hot in that

    • Patricia Costanzo profile image
      Author

      Patricia Costanzo 8 years ago from Behind the Redwood Curtain

      I can't bring the picture back to mind.

    • profile image

      C. C. Riter 8 years ago

      It was on me in the last avatar

    • Patricia Costanzo profile image
      Author

      Patricia Costanzo 8 years ago from Behind the Redwood Curtain

      Thanks C.C., I'd like to see you in your drivers hat.

    • profile image

      C. C. Riter 8 years ago

      Oh I have worn many hats in my day too. Including GT's hardhat, boy was I glad to finally get rid of it. They were still aluminum when I wore mine. I have many left but favor my blue plaid drivers hat when out and about. I also wear my baseball hats if I'm working in the yard.

      Fine hub with great writing

    • Patricia Costanzo profile image
      Author

      Patricia Costanzo 8 years ago from Behind the Redwood Curtain

      Golden Boy, I hope when you do the sun both literally and figuratively shines on you.

    • goldentoad profile image

      goldentoad 8 years ago from Free and running....

      I wear a hard hat at all times. I hope some day to take it off, and let my head feel the sunshine.

    • Patricia Costanzo profile image
      Author

      Patricia Costanzo 8 years ago from Behind the Redwood Curtain

      Chris, I seldom wear real hats, my heads too small. I wish I didn't wear the figurative one's quite as much as I do. Maybe by the time I'm ninety I'll be hatless. I'm glad it surprised you.

    • Patricia Costanzo profile image
      Author

      Patricia Costanzo 8 years ago from Behind the Redwood Curtain

      Patti, thanks for reading. I'm glad you like it.

    • Christoph Reilly profile image

      Christoph Reilly 8 years ago from St. Louis

      Hey Patricia! Oh, I have so many hats (literally,) having been fond of the fedora and Irish Walking caps and cowboy hats when I was younger. Very few remain, and I seldom wear them. I occasionally wear the humble sports cap, not even those not so much. Turning this into the figurative "hat wearing" was a great twist and a pleasant surprise! Very nice, once again! Thanks!

    • profile image

      Patti 8 years ago

      Complicated emotions/relationships simply put. I like it!