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Darkness

Updated on September 5, 2014

There is no hope.

These are a few collections of essays and writings on how horribly pointless and painful life is for most people.

I will respond to all feedback, desperate for attention, for someone to notice that I'm alive.

I doubt I will get many views though. I'm only one person, and not very smart or very interesting...

But I will still write, even if there is no one there, because like a star, I burn my life away, expelling energy and heat, and unlike stars, ideas and interesting thoughts. Or at least interesting to me. I'll let you decide if they're interesting or not...

Life is so pointless...

In this world, there are many ideals, many shoulds and coulds. There are happy, wealthy people with strong families, and then there are people who are not so lucky. There is little you can do about either, but it is certainly possible to choose how you will live. In this life, you can be a painter or a musician, a business owner or a politician. Some roles pay more than others, of course, forcing you to choose between money and happiness doing what you enjoy. For some, money brings happiness. Those people feel good making money. They enjoy working and then having other people work for them, but what if you are not like that? What if you don't want money or influence in the world? What if you know that none of that actually matters, that your difference you make in a world with 7 billion people is beyond insignificant? That your entire life is effectively useless. You will not be famous or become a millionaire. At best, you might get a few hundred social networking friends, but in reality, none of that matters. You will soon die, or the popular internet sites will become unpopular. Your friends will forget about you and you will surely die, for no matter how you struggle, how rich or how powerful you become, you are doomed to die.

Is that it? Is there more after you die? No, there is not. Why should there be? If there is any sort of god, what purpose would this life serve? There would be no purpose except for someone high above to laugh at. Or would a god think nothing of us, the same we think nothing of an ant? That is assuming a god exists, which is highly unlikely.

Like ants, most people are very similar. Some people are republicans, some are democrats, some are very spiritual and some are philosophical and scientific. But what does that mean? It means that most people are the same, based around certain groupings and cliques. You can view this as common ground, or the mind rending fact that you are not unique, that you are a boring and repetitive person. Your ideas are not original, your dreams and aspirations are not original. Nearly everything you have ever thought has already been thought by someone else before.

As grim as it sounds, it is true, and as cliche as it seems, it is still a problem.

No matter how you rationalize your existence, there will always be pain in your life.

Are you happy enough to overcome the pain? Or will you eventually grow older, weaker, lose your memories and eventually realize how horribly useless you've been?

You are stepping closer to death every minute you waste on the internet, aren't you?

Why get off it though? Why do anything? Life is hopeless and painful, even if you are lucky enough to become happy, you are still faced with inevitable death. Perhaps it'd be better to not have been born at all.

Why

Why is life filled with so much pain? Is it because I descended from vicious animals? Because human psychology does not allow sufficient amounts of empathy to develop? Or is it just me, a person cursed from the start? Bad luck, bad karma and a bad brain.

But no, there are others who suffer as well. Why do some people suffer so much, while others find themselves in riches, their lives filled with love, having children and changing the world, at least a little bit? Why am I cursed to be a bottom dweller? No job, no car, no hope at all.

There is no hope for anyone though, really, is there? With the economy on the verge of collapse, world relations falling apart, oil about to dry up and the ecosystem being cleared away for more humans and industry, there is truly no hope. Even if now there are still forests, oil, some amount of peace and money that does still purchase small amounts of food, that will change in the future almost certainly. The few ways out of such a mess will not be considered by most politicians or religious leaders or the wealthy. The world will slowly turn, growing more stagnant, becoming a darker and more horrible, painful place for all people.

Why is life such misery? Why must it grow worse? Why are some people rich enough to even bypass the suffering an economical disaster would bring? Why are some people born into poverty, forced to suffer their entire life, not knowing what it's like to have a loving family, a warm home and enough to eat? How can any person be so unlucky as to be born as me, or even you. Life truly is a mess. I wonder if it's worth living every day.

Questioning...

I do not understand religion, faith or religious people. Do they lack curiosity? Are they unable to ask why? I have often thought, a person in pain would ask "why", begging to know why life is the way it is. Unable to accept such a horrible existence, they want an answer. A person who is born normally, a typical, ordinary, average intelligence person is also likely to be a Christian, if born in the USA. That person does not feel pain the way a person like me does. They may feel heartbreak, or disappointment from failure, but they were not born weak or differently. They can relate to nearly everyone else in their life, for most people in their life are also normal religious people who have also felt that way. But a person who asks "why?", understands "why". They know that most questions go deeper than just two or three "whys". As Feynman's lecture goes, the why question can go on forever, for there is nearly always a reason or final explanation for something, and asking "why" about even that is also possible.

Asking "why" about something while religious is a bit different. "Why is there pain?" Because that is how God made the world." "Why did God make the world that way?" "Because he did" "Why do you know this?" "It's in the Bible." "Why is it in the Bible?" "Because that's how people wrote it, or how God wrote it." "Why did God write it?" "Because humans are evil and need guidance." "How do you know that?" "The Bible says that, and it is my opinion." And at that point, the questioning can just barely go on. Perhaps one can leak out a few more questions, but really, no matter what, it always goes back to there being a god, and the why to that has no answer. There is no god, there is no evidence, there is no reason and there is no explanation. Gravity, heat, energy, and just a few more concepts deeper than I'd like to explore currently is that is all that is needed to form the universe and life. Well developed theories within physics and chemistry can explain it better than I can, but it is quite easy to see that cause and effect rules the cosmos. If the universe came into being, simply due to cause and effect, it would quite obviously form the universe we see now. How do I know this? Because that is what is. There is no bullshit to it. There is no question that cannot be answered, even if it could take years. I will bet none of those answers involve the supernatural in any form. You can ask "How does a magnetic field work, and why?" and get an answer, even if you need to find it yourself. Even if there is no one to answer that, you can find two magnets, and perform experiments that work every time. You can heat the magnets, and watch them lose their magnetic charge, freeze them, spin them around copper and produce useable electricity, or do anything you can think of to find an answer. One is able to experiment with an object in reality and use it to find answers, but only if you ask a question first. A person without pain, a person with no reason to question, a typical human will not ever want to know why. They will perform actions like a non-sentient animal, without thinking. They may speak English and write, but it is only learned, the way an ape can be taught to use a computer to receive food. They do not understand. They do not want to understand. They cannot understand. They do not question things, that is why they believe in gods that do not exist, why they are opinionated and do not question their opinions they were taught, why they have wars and are greedy and seek power. They do not think and that is pitiful, and horrible, for they are more common than people like me. I must suffer with that sort of person, and it only hurts me, because of their own weaknesses.

Or perhaps I am the weak one.

Thinking hard is difficult for some people...

People are incredibly stupid. Ignorance, hate, war, poverty, the unstable and corrupt government, the severe disinterest in science, people falling for propaganda and religion are all problems caused by stupidity.

What is stupidity? A lack of intelligence, or something more? For even people who appear dull have wise things to say, and people who appear intelligent may be incredibly foolish, so one must properly define stupidity.

To me, stupidity is ignoring facts and evidence where it is apparent, saying things without sufficient amounts of research, and believing things even when there is not only an absence of evidence, but also contradicting evidence. When one says one thing, but does the other, or tells a lie, it shows an extreme weakness of mental capacity. The only reason I can justify for lying is to protect yourself, but when you lie to profit or gain from the misfortune of those who believe you, that is perhaps the most horrible thing a person can do. But who does not do that? Yes, most people, if given an opportunity to lie and profit from that lie, knowing they cannot be caught, would do so. Even if they claim they wouldn't, if such an opportunity arouse, I am sure you and I would both take it. Why? Are all people that corrupt? Or is it just being stupid again, for if one begins to think, they would realize a more open, trusting world where people did not lie or say things without knowing would be a much happier, better world. Not only would a person be able to trust another, but ideas could flow faster, allowing the progress of humankind to propagate that much quicker. But that will not happen. People will lie, they will believe foolish ideas, they will buy horoscopes and get their fortunes told. They will believe and trust authority, simply because authority has more money, or bigger guns. They will choose to not think for themselves, because thinking takes work and often leads to severe depression as you realize how horrible and pointless the world is, and how beautiful the universe is, knowing the entire time not only do other people not enjoy it, but they think it was created by supernatural creatures. Yes, in 2012, people believe in such entities. I will not be able to explore space, I cannot walk through a forest without a permit, if I can even find a forest that's still natural. I cannot become a politician because what I would say or propose would offend people who believe that ghosts and demons exist. I will be me. A poor, foolish human surrounded by a sea of others, each dumber than the last.

Fear

“The Only Thing We Have to Fear Is Fear Itself”. A worthy quote by FDR.

But is it true? There are many things a person fears. Whether one will be able to make enough money to continue living in a house, whether one's friends are trustworthy, or just manipulating you, whether you will survive the next time you go out driving, but all that can be explained away as fearing fear. The actual chance those things are happening are not very large, and yet, it is difficult to control fear. You can rationalize it however you want, but if you feel fear, then you feel fear. Social anxiety, or the fear of talking, the fear that what you say comes out sounding stupid, or that what you say is a lie because you cannot share your true feelings. Fear that people will find things out about you that you cannot say, but perhaps still wish people would know. You cannot live without fear, because without fear, you are living blindly. You must fear for your life because life is that unpredictable, and yet all too predictable. We see it constantly, bullies mocking you for being weak, people going to war and dying, because war is reality, guns are reality, people actually use tools to murder other people, and if things went badly, it could happen to you. An economic collapse, or an injury. In a second, you could become crippled for life. Horrible things are waiting to happen to you nearly all the time. There is nothing you can do about it, but think "Does the fear control me, or do I control the fear?". It is unlikely though, that I can ever conquer fear because I am a weak, cowardly person. It would be more simple to simply give up and accept that things nearly always turn out wrong.

People are worthless

People are truly worthless. Why do people have children? Babies have no use. Children have no use. And adults? They also have no use.

There is absolutely no reason to be born, to live or to die. Working, even enjoying life has no use.

Because the universe will eventually end, because humanity will die, because you will die, it would likely have been better to have never been born a human, but rather as a rock, or a small pool of water. Maybe an asteroid. But sadly, I am a human, who is able to feel pain, loss, insecurity, loneliness, fear and apathy. What little happiness there is is nullified by the constant pain of existence.

I do not see why you continue to live. Each day is the same for you. You work, or go to school, complete your pointlessly assigned tasks to make money, then go home exhausted and wait until the next day to do the same. If you think there is more to it, that is fine, but rendered pointless by the fact that you will die soon and forget everything.

You only have one path in this life, and that is straight to death. There is no alternative, there is no choice. You are a slave to death, a servant for the king of unending doom, the black fog that awaits all who are born. You cannot escape by any means, and because that is true for all life, your existence is pointless and has no use.

The saddest part is not that you are useless, but that if you are not a bully, if you don't demand power and control, then someone else will demand it over you. You are either a weak, submissive person, or a totalitarian fiend, who seeks only power and money. Control.

Very, very few people can be both strong and kind, for once strong, you will feel your opinions are more important than others and attempt to change what they think.

I feel this is the worst article I've written and I'm not surprised. A shallow, horrible person like me can only pump out so many depressing articles before feeling more apathy and hopelessness and simply giving up.

That is how worthless I am. My opinions are worthless, so the only comments are opposing what I write, and there is only one person who has commented. That is how worthless and insignificant I am. I might as well already be dead. Or a rock.

What do you think of life?

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      anonymous 4 years ago

      Take some LSD. If nothing matters and is meaningless, why do you get unhappy about life? If there's no point, there's nothing to worry about, and you might as well enjoy it.

    • The-Darkness profile image
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      The-Darkness 5 years ago

      @NeverTooLate2012: God does not exist. Pray all you like, nothing will change. Only money, power and control can change a situation. Without that, without REAL action, you have nothing. Prove me wrong.

    • NeverTooLate2012 profile image

      NeverTooLate2012 5 years ago

      We will pray for you. Please seek counseling &/or a psychiatrist so you can get help.

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      anonymous 5 years ago

      I think life makes no sense at all. But I am enjoying it anyway.