ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

What does God mean when He asks women to submit to their husband?

Updated on July 12, 2011

American society has a strong sense of independence built into it. Women in our society have opportunities that were not available to them in the past. Because of that the verses in Ephesians particularly "Wives be subject to your own husbands" seem more problematic for today's women. What could God have meant?

I suppose this is an issue that every Christian woman struggles with at some time. For myself, when I became engaged I struggled with this idea for a long time. I finally came to the conclusion that it was really a matter of trusting God.

After all God also asks that we obey our rulers (unless, of course, what they are asking is unbiblical). We trust that God is in control of who our rulers are and that He is working out His plan through their choices. However, it becomes more difficult to trust when that leadership is more personal.

Another thing we should remember is that the letter doesn't stop with "Wives be subject to your own husbands". Paul is telling us about God's plan for the perfect marriage and God doesn't just require the wife's obedience. Husbands have instructions as well. "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave himself up for her". Men are instructed to love their wives even to the point of sacrificing their own lives.

So what does this look like in practical terms? It would mean a wife who is looking out for her husband's plans. What does he want to achieve for himself and his family and how can she aid these goals? Meanwhile the husband will be planning for that which is best for his wife. What would make her a better person? A happier person?

If you look at the whole picture, what God wants to achieve is a beautiful image of marriage. So again it comes down to trust. We don't trust that our husbands can do as God asks (probably because we have trouble doing it ourselves). Moreover, we don't trust God.

Try to remember Romans 8:28. "And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose." Even if our husbands are resistant to God's working upon their hearts God has a plan for our good. And, while our husbands may not love us as God commanded, God loves us more than any human being could. Hold that thought to your heart.

If you would still like more information on this subject I heard a sermon on this topic "Submission in time". I hope this has provided a little help.

Ephesians Sermon Part 1

Ephesians Sermon Part 2

The Beautiful Faith of Fearless Submission


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment
    • Joy M profile imageAUTHOR

      Joy M 

      7 years ago from Sumner, Washington

      I'm sorry. I published this awhile ago and I don't remember.

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      What is the sermon titles do the Ephesians part 1 &2 above. My daughters have to hear this. Thanks.

    • Joy M profile imageAUTHOR

      Joy M 

      10 years ago from Sumner, Washington

      I would say that it is impossible to love someone too much. The problem would be in your priorities. Is God first? If you are praying and reading your Bibles together it makes it that much easier to keep God in the center of your marriage and your life.

    • profile image


      10 years ago

      Can a woman love her husband too much? What about God's jealousy. I know that my husband is a man and not God. There are things that only God can fulfill. Yet, my love for my husband grows daily. Yes, we are newlyweds! My friends say to be careful that I don't love him more than God. I don't want to do that and I ask God to modify my love so that I don't get into trouble with my Creator.

    • Kebennett1 profile image


      10 years ago from San Bernardino County, California

      Very good article! I have never taken submission to my husband as a bad thing because under God's instruction he has never abused that authority over me. He is the head of our household and what he say's goes. He does not go against what God's Word teaches, so why would I not follow him? We communicate and discuss everything but I leave the final decision always to him. I respect my husband very much and in turn he respects me. I am very blessed to have found and married him. 23 years married and counting :)

    • Joy M profile imageAUTHOR

      Joy M 

      10 years ago from Sumner, Washington

      Yes, people often point out God's command for women in marriage and forget that the men have a command to follow as well.

    • RGraf profile image

      Rebecca Graf 

      10 years ago from Wisconsin

      I'm glad that you put in the second half of that verse. I believe everyone leaves that out and it has caused many hardships and heartaches in marriages.

    • Joy M profile imageAUTHOR

      Joy M 

      10 years ago from Sumner, Washington

      Yes, I think a lot of people have the misconception that submitting would mean becoming a doormat. Really it is choosing to follow your husband's leadership. Unfortunately it is not a choice you make just once. However, I think I'm getting better at daily choosing to follow his leadership. :)

    • Eyes2YourSoul profile image


      10 years ago from World Wide

      Great blog.

      I truly believe that when a man fashions his heart after God and applies kingdom principles to his life there should be no problem of submitting. Submitting simply means "yielding the rightful authority to" and being a man is the head of the household, as you said, loving his wife and sacrificing for her...Submitting to him should not be an issue.

      I teach women this as well. The key thing is people realizing that submission doesn't mean controlling and taking the free will from a person. Even God doesn't do that! Keep up the good teaching!

    • Joy M profile imageAUTHOR

      Joy M 

      10 years ago from Sumner, Washington

      Thank you all.

      I found this issue to be like so many in that understanding does not necessarily lead to application. But I think it makes it a little easier. Sometimes. :)

    • Rose Gold profile image

      Rose Gold 

      10 years ago from Hayward, CA

      Great Hub! I was planning on doing a Hub like this, but I couldn't have put it better myself.

      Keep up the good work.

      God Bless,


    • profile image

      Eddie Perkins 

      10 years ago

      This is a subject that a man better be very careful about how he responds. :) I do agree with you and this is a good article.  Thank you. ~ eddie

    • AEvans profile image


      10 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      Now that was clearly explained and God placed it on your heart to write and explain, as so many do not understand what the actually meaning is.:)


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
    ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)