Why forgive ?
So many times someone close to us - maybe mother , father, sister, wife, husband, friends - point out to us that "you have picked up this accent from someone", "I have never seen you talk like this", "Where did you learn this from" . Where does this come from then?
When a child is born she is like a blank slate..Each day of her life..family, friends, strangers and numerous new situations leave a mark on mark. It is like so many people paint on an empty canvas and create you.
According to me a person is like a collage of various ideas, attitudes and behaviors picked up from several instances in his/her life.
Then, the next question arises is - Is there anything called originality?
Yes, of-course.. what one picks up from the environment are the ingredients..several thousands of ingredients but how one applies it.. how one mixes it to produce a perfect cocktail is the originality..and just like no two people look alike...no two ingredients match alike..hence so many different people do so many different things in their own style.
A thought worth pondering over here is ..If I am a mixture of several people good bad or the ugly I have met in my life ..should I carry a grudge over people .. should I hate someone because I have had an unpleasant experience with that someone.
In practical life, it is very difficult to ignore grudges, anger, urges for revenge or hatred but if one starts believing that even you yourself have a small part of the person ...he/she has rubbed some part of her/his on you then you would probably hate the other person less..
This topic is completely open for discussion as many might differ..But even if this theory helps one person to hate a little less I would feel happy that I was successful.
Following is a poem I have written to explain my point
Puddle of water in the rain-what meets you makes you
The silent night partied tonight,
a perfect silence had it all,
the dimlit moon ,the windy breezer,
the young stars danced their heart out,
and an occasional manmade one moved by,
I sit down in the moist field,
just wet by rain,
gazing at the sky,
sometimes in life you r not alone,
sometimes in life so much is told,
i found a friend who shared all,
the one next to whom i lay put,
the puddle of water spoke to me,
what is it that you look at son,
ask me once i ve seen it all,
i look weak i might be old,
but ders something very similar between me and you ,you must be told,
look at me son,
this is my life in front of you,
the passing cloud is the ticking clock,
i started with a drop in this cozy warm moist land,
what makes me wise ? what makes me have the ripple you are so fascinated about?
every drop of me is a gift given to me by the rain which just passed by,
i thank them all ..I owe them all,
each drop makes a travel ..a journey thousands of miles over,
a character different each one gets,
some come splashing,
some slide in,
stories of speed of love of war each one has told,
i take something from each one my son,
just like you,
i may be one but i am many,
every fellow who said hello,
rubbed a part of his or her life,
your family, your friends, your acquaintances my friend,
the ones you ve loved, the one you have fought,
they make you smile, they make you cry,
forgive them all and hugg them tight,
the trench i dig deep within,
i store my love in its heart,
the rain has gone so i will fade,
but peace with all is what i take,
you have a life ahead of you,
'what meets you makes you' ,my friend
carry a smile give it to them all,
show them your love,
before you fall.
Brief summary of what Hinduism and Buddhism has to say about this
Forgiveness is an important act not for the one who has been forgiven but for those who forgive. If forgiven a person does not come clean. He/she will still be subjected to the Karma laws. So, don't worry about that person. Tell him/her why he she is wrong but forgive the person because you do not have to unnecessarily carry the burden of anger.