Hi blake4d! What's up?
I think, perhaps, we are only 'activated,' to coin a term, through other people, the multiple perspectives they have of us. Often times, when someone is criticizing us, for example, we may say something like: 'You don't understand!' making a fetish of our supposed complexity.
I would argue that when we say, 'You don't understand,' we are really saying: 'You don't understand me the way I want you to understand me.' In other words: 'You are projecting back to me the defensively flattering self-portrayal that I'm trying to emanate. You are showing me an ugly side of myself that I do not care to look at.' And so on and so forth.
Simply stated: Other people do not see us as we 'see' ourselves, or perhaps 'justify' ourselves, is a better word. Nevertheless, I suppose we can develop reasonable 'self-knowledge,' is we are open to our own strengths, talents, abilities, and gifts, and honest with ourselves about our weaknesses, shortcomings, and blindspots.
You know, blake4d, I used to often wonder how much 'self-knowledge' those first-round bomb-outs on American Idol have (you know, the really terrible, alleged 'singers'). What on Earth made them think they could sing??!! What a breakdown in self-awareness! 'Doesn't anybody love these people?' I would often ask myself. Who let them out of the house with the cockamamie idea that they could sing?
And so on and so forth.
Take it easy.