Twice within the past two weeks I've had people ask me this question which I find terribly offensive. A darling young mother and neighbor, in front of her three children with lovely Old Testament names, blurted out at the end of our conversation, "Are you a believer?" Someone else asked me the next week if I was a Christian. I've had religious training since four years old and attended Catholic school until a junior in high school when I had contemplated joining the convent. I am on my own religious path. Do you find this ques. offensive as well?
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smart lady MizBejabbers
Great points IDONO - sometimes we do not realize the vibes we give off and people may misinterpret our actions, thoughts or words.
Thank you "SJ" You pinpointed exactly why I was offended. I had just met each of these people. We were having a casual first conversation in both cases. It certainly did feel like it was an inquiry as to whether I belonged to the "right camp".
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ah, yes.. What I mentioned above. There seems to be a new drive to evangelize. Again, I accept it, but I really don't like it. It makes me want to answer in the negative even if I wanted to answer in the positive.
Calynbana , I like your approach. However, if you tell someone that it's personal the question is answered and judgment has been passed. Someone once told me "You don't have to understand WHY something offends someone; just accept that it does."
If the person asking is actually a Christian then judgement would not be passed. If not then their judgement is upon themselves.I just don't know why anybody would choose to be offended. It is a choice after all. I choose to not be upset by strangers
I disagree that evangelists will stop bothering you if you say you're not interested. SOME of them don't take no for an answer, and some don't even take Yes for an answer!! They give the whole mission a bad name, and its why people avoid them.
Beata, I too was raised Catholic. I call myself "culturally Catholic" because I have roots in that religion. Your sentence would be a great retort to the people who ask that question. "Everyone is a believer in something!" I think I"ll use it! :)
Thank you, Leslie. I suppose the only way a believer might understand the insult in the story above is to imagine you're new to the neighborhood, I introduce myself to you and immediately ask you, in a self-righteous tone, "Are you an atheist?"
I really like that response. I'm going to use it! Thank you 'Renee'
TNSabrina, The self-righteous thing is exactly what bothers me, but you're a better person than I am to laugh it off. (Maybe when I was young I could do that, now I'm just old and cranky and too impatient.)
Sometimes it feels as rude as someone asking "Are you married?" "Are you a Democrat?" Right?
Thanks Micelle, I think that direction should come from the people who share their belief system. I doubt if they'd find the direction they're looking for from me :)
Great point Michelle. And Billie, you never know what you can teach someone. I see it as just a question. What they do with the info is their business. And if you choose not to answer there is nothing wrong with that either.
Duffsmon, Thanks! I know what you mean. There's more behind the question than appears. It seems to be an attempt to convert one to the questioners own particular belief system. I wish I could come up with a really good answer for the next time:)
This happened to me a long time ago... by a Jehovah's Witness! Being Presbyterian wasn't good enough, I guess!!
Yes, I understand among Christians. This woman in my example had no idea of whether I was or not. I don't think I should be ashamed of my secular humanism, but I wouldn't presume to ask someone, "Are you a secular humanist?" "Are you an agnostic?"