The question in and of itself does not make sense.
Is society failing us or are we failing ourselves? Insinuates that there is a difference between the two, when the truth of the matter is that we are SOCIETY and there is no other.
Society is the complete combination of citizens. We, together make up society, so it is the combination of citizens who are in society that are failing America or whatever country you are part of. That includes the citizens, who are elected to political office.