My name is Trent and I am a beachoholic (hello Trent the people in the hall all reply). I first started using the beach when I was 4. At first I just built sand castles and paddled. Later I would swim in the sea with arm bands and play chase.
But as the years went by I started using it more and more. I kissed girls there, sunbathed, had BBQ's, played cricket, threw Frisbees. You name it I did it. The more things I did the more I had to be there.
In time my addiction to the beach became so great that I had to get a job on the sand so that I could work and play in my favourite place. This is my story of living the beach life and why it's so great that I'm not worried about my addiction.
Life's a beach
Living on the beach
You know you're cut out for beach living when you
a) Love sand (some people hate it), the beach lover thrives on it
b) Enjoy swimming in the sea
c) Love BBQ's
d) Wear animal clothing well
e) Embrace the heat of the sun
f) Love life!
Beach living is not for everyone. If you are in two minds then perhaps this guide is for you.
1. Some people are scared of the sea. For me it's always been exciting.
I love running down there in the morning and diving head first under that first wave. The exhilaration of the salt and frigid cold spur you to drive your arms end after end until you are way out in the blue. That feeling of being alone staring out at the horizon is always one I thrive on. Add to that the knowledge there are hundreds if not thousands of fish in close proximity just makes for a bigger buzz.
Embrace it. Thrive on it. Enjoy it.
2. The sun is your friend. It gives life to the World. It heats us when it is cold. It brings a smile to the face. So where better to enjoy it than the beach?
You can lie back on your towel and feel those rays warming you up. You can read a book, listen to tunes, chat with your mates or whatever. It's all good.
Add to that the fact people are cooking nicely in coconut cream sun lotion and you've got a nice smell to go with the view.
Far better than being on some city street with people getting irate, stuck in traffic, smelling wrong and swearing til the cows come home.
3. Surfing - The sport of kings. The one true thrill in life that takes no prisoners. Surfing is a sport that separates the men from the boys and the gals from the girlies.
It is like nothing else on Earth (well except maybe sky diving). When riding, and this is going to sound well corny but I invite you to get over it, there is nothing else on Earth that matters. Feeling the swell as you move is one of life's great pleasures and should be mandatory for all bored people.
4. Fishing. Where else can you just walk out your door and go catch your lunch and dinner without some massive permit hassle? It's just genius.
Walk down to the long groyne, cast your line and sit back in the sunshine as you wait for your dinner to come find you. Alternatively get out in a small rowing boat and go hunt the mackerel.
5. BBQ's. When you're done fishing you can gut your fish, put in foil with some lemon and place on the BBQ along with some burgers, sausages, ribs, shrimp, you name it. Before you know it a crowd of friends will find their way to you under the guise of 'just passing by'. They will devour your BBQ and you will be the toast of the beach.
6. Beach football and cricket. Once the food has started going down you're going to want to burn some energy so what better way than by playing beach football or cricket.
Everyone can join in. The great equaliser of playing on sand is that it makes balls do funny things. So even if you're rubbish at said sport you've got every chance of looking like a born natural on this surface.
7. Time. It's a well known fact that time moves more slowly on the beach. There is less need to check on the time and subsequently you just go about your day according to the heat of the sun and the rumble of your belly.
It's like getting back to primitive living. If you're hungry you eat. If you're tired you sleep. If you have energy you go fish, surf or repair your beach hut. If you need a mental challenge you pick up that 6 day old crossword and try again at pesky 6 down.
All is good because you have all the time in the World.
8. Beach fire. As and when the night finally starts to draw in you can get a beach fire on the go. This is where the beer and whisky comes out, the guitars appear and the company of good friends is ever welcome.
Sit back and gaze at the stars safe in the knowledge you get to do all this nothingness again tomorrow... and the next day... and the next day... oh and the day after that.
Well that is until some nasty taxman bites you in the ass for some tax you owe and you suddenly realise you need to do a bit of work. Ah but still the life of the beach bum is a good one. I thoroughly recommend it!