CMLL Super Viernes Preview: More Torneo Increible de Parejas!
Before we get to the fun I must make an announcement. You may have noticed I haven’t been as prolific with the writing recently, pretty much limiting myself to CMLL previews and reviews. The reason behind that; I’m pretty pissed off with wrestling right now. You can thank the Lucha Underground situation for that; in what should be a time of celebrating the fact that the promotion will eventually be viewed on Netflix I’m instead spending the day reading about the sniveling, underhanded weasels hurting the promotion (despite having little to no responsibility in creating what made the show great), the wrong people being blamed for the incompetence of the higher ups mistakes and fans/insiders/people within the industry either blaming the wrong people with blanket statements or not spreading the right info so they can get a laugh in at the people responsible. It’s a sucky situation and, unfortunately, it’s starting to sap my enjoyment out of wrestling the more apparent it becomes that every agenda regarding LU supports everything but it’s continued existence. As such, I’m going into tunnel vision. There will be LU, AAA, and other sorts of wrestling columns again eventually, but for right now I’m going to simply focus on previewing and reviewing CMLL. It’s truly the only thing in wrestling I enjoy anymore. Thank you for taking the time to read this and now let’s get to previewing the next Super Viernes episode, featuring Block B of the Torneo Increible de Parejas tournament. Moses, you know what to do.
Eléctrico & Stukita vs. Mercurio & Pierrothito
What to Expect: Stukita! Mercurio and Pierrothito on a Friday night! The small hope for a consistent performance from Eléctrico! What’s not to love? In all seriousness, this should easily be the best match of the undercard, both a compliment to the talent here and a sad commentary on the lack of talent in the other matches. You’re going to be begging for those tournament matches for the first hour or so sports fans. BEGGING!
Winners: I see the technicos taking this one after a Stukita moonsault on Pierrothito in fall three.
La Vaquerita, Marcela, Sanely vs. Metálica, Reyna Isis, Tiffany
What to Expect: On behalf of every lucha fan everywhere, I’d like to say this to the person who booked this match.
Like…what on earth must go through one’s head to think this match was a good idea? I count only two people in this match who are halfway decent; Marcela and Metálica, and naturally they’re on opposing teams and have no good luchadoras to team with. Hell between Reyna Isis and Tiffany the rudas team may be one of the worst ever assembled; the Toronto Maple Leafs before Auston Matthews can’t believe how bad it looks. The only hope here is that Sanely and Vaquerita really step up, followed by Reyna and Tiffany getting little to nothing to do. Seeing as neither of those things will happen, this match is likely going to get really, really bad. Like Angel after losing his soul bad.
Winners: Seeing as Marcela is the only one in this match CMLL does anything with, her team will win and she’ll get the pin on Tiffany following…something. Who cares? I’m personally going to spend every second of this match hoping Zeuxis comes out, knees all six luchadora’s heads into the stands and then leaves, ending the match early. It’s good to have dreams folks. Well unless you want your favorite wrestling promotion to succeed, then it’s not.
Diamante Azul, Marco Corleone, Volador Jr. vs. Kráneo, Pierroth, Yoshi Tatsu
What to Expect: Hey, it’s the Yoshi Tatsu debut absolutely no one wanted! The good news for him; he’s the second best rudo in a match that features Volador Jr. on the other side. The bad news; he’s the second best rudo on a team featuring Kráneo (a good, but misplaced luchador in this match) and Pierroth in a match specifically designed to further set up Diamante Azul vs. Pierroth. I’d say the bad news outweighs the good here for the former WWE star. I’ll be giving him a fair shake and I do have fond memories of his WWE stint (even if he never blew me away as a performer). But every time I’ve seen him in New Japan he’s been mediocre, and many of the reviews I’ve read of his performance there have been far less kind. Unless he reveals he’s been hiding something during his Bullet Club Hunter run or just really clicks with Volador, I wouldn’t expect much from him and I’d expect even less from the rudo team as a whole. Hell I’d expect nothing from this match. The only redeemable quality I can think of is Volador failing to help out Diamante Azul again because he (like the rest of us) doesn’t care for Diamante-Pierroth, and even that’s something that appeals more to my own amusement than anything else.
Winners: This will be either the usual technico victory via DQ after Diamante is unmasked/fouled by Pierroth, or the usual rudo victory via missed unmasking/foul by Pierroth on Diamante. I’ll go with the latter this time around. The worst part; you know this is going all three falls. Grodd (and Volador) help us.
Torneo Increible de Parejas Block B
Mistico & Negro Casas vs. Rush & Terrible and Último Guerrero & Valiente and Dragón Lee & La Máscara and Atlantis & Euforia and Dragón Rojo Jr. & Guerrero Maya Jr. and Ripper & Titán and Hechicero & Stuka Jr.
What to Expect: We’re finally to the good part of the show! Well, minus the stupid seeding battle royal at least. Unlike last week the team selection is pretty solid across the board. Mistico and Negro Casas is intriguing.UG and Valiente, while predictable as hell, should be cool. Dragón Lee and Máscara could be sick. Atlantis and Euforia gets me hyped if only because they’re two of my favorites. Hechicero and Stuka is interesting. Dragón Rojo and Guerrero Maya is really interesting. Really all these combos work well with the exception of Ripper/Titán and Rush/Terrible, and that’s only because a) Ripper is involved and b) Rush was far better off with Atlantis but can’t be because he’s a “technico.” You know, because only in CMLL can the best rudo in the world be classified as a good guy because REASONS!
Those nitpicks aside this should be a far better block than last week, even if the matches are short. The question is who has a realistic shot. I’d love to see Hechicero and Stuka go far but there’s a better chance of people actually agreeing on something Lucha Underground related than that occurring. Ditto for the Ripper/Titán, Rojo/Maya (unfortunately) and probably the Rush/Terrible combo, even though they’re both rudos. If I were a betting man I’d keep an eye on Mistico/Casas, UG/Valiente and Lee/Máscara as the favorites, with Atlantis/Euforia as the dark horse. Not only are those combos the highest profile, but all of them match up well with Volador/Cavernario for the finals. Whoever it is (don’t worry; I’ll let you know in a minute), it should set up for some fun tag matches on this show, a potentially really good main event and a potentially spectacular main event next week. So much for this being a waste of time!
Winners: I really, REALLY want to see Atlantis and Euforia win this even though it makes no sense. It’s because it makes no sense I have them listed as a dark horse. Ultimately I think this comes down to UG/Valiente against Dragón Lee/La Máscara, with UG and Valiente pulling it out and heading to the finals. They’re just too tied up with each other and Volador (either as teammates or rivals) for that match not to happen. Even still, let’s hope this doesn’t happen just so we don’t have to hear Rob Viper going on about how he was right again. That’ll be even more unbearable than matches two and three on this show!
That’s a wrap sports fans. I’ll be back tomorrow to review this show and I’ll see if I can get something pop culture related going in between then or afterwards. Till we meet again, more Rupert Giles!