Does “Fore” Give Me a Better Golf Game?

I have admired the men and women of the PGA (Professional Golfers Association) and the LPGA (Ladies Pro Golfers Association), but I do admit that the women golfers play the game with a certain passion, more than I can say about the professional men’s golfers. And no, this isn’t a slam against the male golfers. Okay. Let me speak freely. Personally, I like the beauty of the Pro Women’s Golfers and I do not pull any punches, I would say that among the lady golfers there isn’t one that I wouldn’t label as attractive.

Such names as Paula Creamer, Lexi Thompson, Cristie Kerr, Nancy Lopez and Karie Webb. Sure there are a lot more, but for the time-frame, I will stop at these wonderful golfers. And as a gesture of respect, I want to give homage to the men’s pro golfers: Arnold Palmer, Phil Mickelson, Jack Nicklaus, Tom Watson and Ernie Ells. I will ring stupid for saying this statement: I know that in order for these female and male pro golfers to make it “on the circuit,” as sportscasters say, these golfers must have put on so many hours of practice that a near-correct amount would be impossible.

But, and I hate to “beat a dead mule,” I love to watch Christie Kerr on the ladies side and Arnold Palmer (in is hey day) because these two golfers both held their “galleries” spell-bound. In other words, every shot that made counted. And there were no unimportant shots in the entire tournament. Have I ever tried to play golf? Some, but only when I learned how to putt (on a putting green) while my wife and I were on vacation. The score: Pam hit 10 – 10 footers. I counted them. And this was her first time to putt, but to me, this was more than Beginner’s Luck. She had golfing skills. I shot 3 out of 7, but I will not talk about that because it is really shameful.

a few of the traditions that go with golf and see if you and understand them. Honestly, some of these “rules” are not that tough and then there are some that are. So here we go.

• When a golfer tees-off or hits his/her second shot and their ball goes into the water, the golf officials meet instantly meet with the golfer and decide how far the golfer must hold the ball up in the air and toss it in order to continue play. I may sound ignorant, but a simple underhanded toss from the edge of the water be more sensible?

• Why can’t the golf announcers walk along with the golfers to call the game for TV? To me, this would make the game more interesting. The real announcers are many yards away from the action in an air-conditioned hut along with liquid refreshments and a TV monitor to show them each play. This is very stale.

• Why must golf tournaments be shot over 18-holes? I propose a special golfing challenge that has the golfers stand about 50-yards from a sand trap and take turns and throw their ball into the sand trap. Then the golfer stands into the sand trap and see how many strokes it will take for the golfer to hit it out of the hole. Oh, the time that this move would make.

• I would love to see a series of professional barbecue grill-masters setting up their grills on the fringe of the sides of the green. These guys (and girls) are pro’s barbecue specialists and so are the golfers, so one pro washes the other.

• and see what it means. The term,”fore,” is a short form of the word "before," which is a synonym to "ahead." Thus, fore literally means, "look out ahead." Golfers use this term immediately following an errant shot as a way to warn other golfers that a ball might be heading their way.
• This meaning to me cannot be said any other way but meaningless. Who ever got their golf ball on a tee and as they put their driver downward, they would yell, “before!” I know that heads in the gallery would look mystified. So would the rest of the players.
• The same can be said about that other meaningless term, “ahead,” and I think that this term would work up to a point, but the only people that would know what this term means is when they hear “ahead,” and they hit the dirt on their stomach’s.

instead of yelling “fore” to drive their golf balls hundreds of yards to the green right in front of the yellow flag.

• “Jim!”

• “Hound dog!”

• “Shake it!”

• “Sunshine!”

• “Geronimo!”

• “Charge!”

• “Mr. Carlson!”

• “Oh, Jennifer!”

• "Five!"
• "Luuuncccchhhhh!"

Okay. Since the term, “fore,” has been established as the term for golf tournament’s to begin, I think that my substitute terms would only gain a lot laughs and lawsuits.

Next time I may publish a hub on “Why I Would Have a Tough Time as a Woman Golfer”

September 2, 2019______________________Hope You Had a Great Labor Day!