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Eagles-Dolphins Postgame: Time To Lose

Updated on November 15, 2015

If you are so delusional that you think the Eagles can still play meaningful game this season, please stop reading now. I don't want to waste my time with people who won't deal with reality.

Sunday's 20-19 loss to the Miami Dolphins should end the Philadelphia Eagles season. Oh sure, they still have to play the last seven games on their schedule, but any reasonable Eagles fan should be rooting for them to lose every remaining game. They can't possibly win a playoff game if they happen to fall ass backwards into the playoffs in the pathetic NFC East, so what's the use. They might as well lose the rest of their games now and improve their draft position for next season.

I will pause now, while the dopes among you start to tell me I'm not a real fan. You know who you are. You're the same people who said I wasn't a real fan when I said the Eagles were better off not winning the final game of last season against the Giants. How did that work out for you? Yeah, thought so.

Anyway, the Eagles lost a game against the Miami Dolphins, where I sat there in the stadium and was sure they couldn't possibly lose early in the first half. Only, somehow Chip Kelly and his horrible play-calling allowed them to lose. And yes, this is on Kelly.

The uninformed among you out there will try to blame this one on Mark Sanchez, but that would be ignoring the facts.

Yes, Sanchez threw his usual awful interception to lose the game. But that was only after he threw a couple of nice touchdown passes that didn't count. On one, Miles Austin didn't drag his foot like any decent receiver would have done on a perfect pass by Sanchez and on the other, the Eagles were flagged for illegal formation. Bad teams like the Eagles make stupid mistakes to cost themselves games. So frustrating.

The Eagles had a 16-3 lead in this game and somehow didn't exploit the NFL's 31st ranked run defense. That is inexcusable. It is also typical of Chip Kelly who continually has to try to show everyone how smart he is. Or thinks he is.

The Eagles got the early lead, somehow scoring 16 first quarter points after scoring 10 points in the first quarter of the first eight games of the season. It's just too bad, they stop scoring after that except for a chip shot FG.

Kelly called a ridiculous 48 pass plays and only 36 running plays, even though his team was leading most of the game. Oh sure, Sam Bradford got hurt in the third quarter and Sanchez had to come into the game, but isn't that when you would want to run the ball? Not Kelly. Oh no, he's a "genius", remember?

Speaking of genius moves, the Eagles receivers were completely invisible this game besides TE Brent Celek, who preceded Kelly in Philadelphia. Celek had 4 catches for 134 yards, but the rest of the Eagles receivers were MIA, as usual. Did I mention that Kelly brought in all these useless wide receivers? After his "breakout" game last week, No.1 receiver Jordan Matthews had all of 3 catches for 21 yards this week. Pathetic.

Even worse than that was the performance of DeMarco Murray, who had 61 yards rushing on 21 carries. That just isn't good enough. Especially not for a guy who is getting paid a ridiculous amount of money. I would also like to take this opportunity to ask all those Chipettes out there who think Chip Kelly is a genius if they still like that LeSean McCoy for Kiko Alonso trade? Alonso had 3 whole tackles today, but I guess that's actually good consider how horrible all the other former Oregon Ducks on the roster have performed this season.

Do you still think Chip Kelly should have pushed LeSean McCoy out the door?
Do you still think Chip Kelly should have pushed LeSean McCoy out the door?

The really sad part is that Sam Bradford was playing decent before he left the game with a concussion and injured left shoulder. He completed 19 of 25 passes for 236 yards and a TD. It's just too bad he didn't do enough to extend that first quarter lead before he left the game. Of course, that's more his head coach's fault than Bradford's fault. There is no excuse for throwing the ball 48 times in a game where you were leading and playing against a defense that hadn't stopped anybody from running the ball all season.

The Eagles special teams also helped lose this game too. Caleb Sturgis missed a chip shot field goal and the Eagles had a punt blocked that set up a Dolphins TD. Every facet of the Eagles team failed at one point or another during this wretched loss.

I'm not going over the play-by-play because it's just too painful. And I'm ticked off that this Eagles team is so inconsistently bad this season that there is no good reason to root for them in the near future. Just know that the Eagles got a big lead and let it slowly get away from them, much like the season has now gotten away from them.

I don't see why anyone would want them to win any more games. Do they want the Eagles to win games so they can have a better record, like last season? That didn't do anything other than push the team further down the draft board. Are there still Eagles fans out there that think this team is even good? If so, then those people need to be locked in padded rooms for the betterment of society. We don't need nutjobs like that out in the real world with the rest of us.

What do you think of the Eagles now?

See results

No, this Eagles team is horrible. They can't even beat mediocre teams anymore and certainly can't beat a playoff team if they were to somehow win the pathetic NFC East with a losing record. Let the Giants do that.

It's better if the Eagles just start losing now. That way we can get rid of Chip Kelly, the predictable head coach with the gimmicky college offense and Chip Kelly the rookie GM who is so obviously over-matched at the NFL level. Let him go back to college, where he belongs. It's just too bad he can't take all his stupid useless Oregon Ducks with him when he leaves the team in a pile of ashes.

NFC East Standing

New York Giants
Washington Redskins
Philadelphia Eagles
Dallas Cowboys

There are no positives to this loss to the Miami Dolphins. The Eagles were the heavily favored team, playing at home and they choked. Now they should be taken out back and put out of our misery like Old Yeller. Forget redemption. Forget any positives the team had going after beating the Cowboys last week. The Eagles are now quarterbacked by Mark Sanchez and multiple turnovers are soon to follow. It's over people. Just accept it.

Don't fool yourself into thinking that the Eagles can beat the Tampa Bay Bucs next week or the Detroit Lions on Thanksgiving. The Bucs just beat the lowly Cowboys and the Lions just upset the Packers. Do you really think an Eagles team led by turnover-machine Sanchez and pass-happy Chip Kelly can beat those teams? Then there are games against the Patriots and Cardinals. Even wishful thinking won't help you there.

The season is over, Eagles fans. It's just a matter of deciding whether or not you want to torture yourself by thinking that this team still has a chance to do anything this season. Personally, I'll be rooting for 7 losses to close out the season, so we can get the best draft pick possible. Hopefully, the next GM or coach will actually draft an offensive lineman and the team can start the long rebuilding process that will be necessary after the dumpster fire that Kelly leaves behind.

Time to put the Eagles out of their (Our) misery?

Don't be fooled if the Eagles accidentally win a game sometime over the next few weeks either. That will just make the inevitable loss the next week all the more painful, just like this one.

No. Step away from the Eagles. It's time to do the right thing and accept that this team is not good enough to win anything....even the crappy NFC East that nobody else seems to want to win.

Think of this as a public service announcement for the mental health of all Eagles fans. Your team sucks, Eagles fans. The sooner you come to grips with that reality, the better it will be for you. And I know it won't be easy for you to root for your hometown team to lose the rest of their games this season, but it really is for the best.


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    • Bob Whalon profile imageAUTHOR

      Bob Whalon 

      3 years ago from Souderton, PA

      We're going to have to drink a LOT to get through the rest of these games this season.

    • profile image

      Marc Henri 

      3 years ago

      Hey Bob, I completely agree with you. Better off doing the necessary for next year. And with a new coach.


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