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FIFA Women's World Cup Preview
Futbol, soccer, football, no-handsies: call it what you will, but this game enjoys worldwide popularity rivaled only by eating and sleeping. The Women's World Cup will be televised into television sets all over this little blue marble we call Earth. No one will be able to escape the social gravitational pull of these epic games. Entire countries will shut down during the pregame shows. Babies will stop being born. No one within 10 miles of a television or a radio will perform any productive work until the last millisecond of Extra Time has clicked away into nothingness. Hordes of fanatic fans will pin their hopes and dreams to ladies in gym shorts running around on extremely well manicured lawns with lines drawn on them.
We present a overview of a summary of a synopsis of the teams competing for the World Cup. This information is intended for entertainment purposes only: refrain from betting your house of your family on the outcomes of any World Cup matches. Don't ask us why.
What Teams Are Playing?
Germany: The lady Germans will come together and play as a well-oiled machine to compete with any other team brave enough to step onto the pitch with them. Look for these athletes to score goals and play defense, almost never at the same time.
Canada: Canadian soccer has pinned its' hopes on these ladies. No Canadian team has prepared harder or trained with more intensity.
Nigeria: The Nigerian 11 will play with great pride. They will compete as intensely as any other team in the tournament.
France: Being in the World Cup Tournament is a huge honor for this squad. They have a mix of experienced players and young enthusiastic talent that can take them a long way, or not.
Japan: Look for this team to come together and play as a single unit. They will attack their opponents' goal and vigorously defend their own goal.
New Zealand: Some of their players will get hurt and others will not. The players that get hurt will not play as well as they would have played has they remained uninjured. The healthy players will contribute more to the positive fortunes of the team over the length of the entire tournament.
Mexico: The Mexican team may start slowly as they become accustomed to playing on an international stage. Once the butterflies have been vanquished, they will play up to their potential.
England: England loves their soccer and their soccer players love them back. This team loves to play soccer and loves to play together.They also love winning, but they are much less keen on losing.
USA: Every soccer fan in the United States is extremely anxious to see how this team will perform in the World Cup Tournament. The woman have prepared with a high level of intensity and media coverage. Many people who will watch the matches will know their names.
Colombia: Football has been akin to a national pastime for many years in Colombia. Every Colombian with a radio, television, Internet connection, or a neighbor who owns one or more of these devices will be watching the Colombian squad from the opening kickoff through the last fake injury.
Sweden: Swiss soccer tradition expects high levels of success in The World Cup. Expect the Swiss women to play hard with good passing and stingy defense. They will blend a unique recipe of veteran experience and youthful exuberance.
Korea DPR: No one loves their soccer more than the Koreans. Korean Soccer rises to the level of a national event that draws everyone together. They all pull for their National Team when it compete for the World Cup.
Brazil: Look for precision set plays and headlong rushes down the field, sometimes in the same offensive series. Defensively, the Brazilian squad looks very tough, if they can avoid key injuries to key players at key points in the tournament.
Norway: Expect this team to be well-prepared for whatever is thrown at them by whatever team the tournament throws at them.
Australia: The rich history of Australian soccer will keep millions of Australians interested in the exploits of the Australian Women's World Cup football team, but that won't help the actual players when it comes time to actually play the games. This team has been hand-picked by some of the top football experts in Australia and will be coached by some of the other ones.
Equatorial Guinea: Some experts assert that these players may be inexperienced on the world stage. However, when the lights come on and the Equatorial Guinean women score a few goals, different experts will assert differently. Some surprises may be in store for all the experts.