ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Hockey Philosophy

Updated on December 19, 2017

The Hockey Coach and the Hockey Mom

A friend of mine asked me to help him out as an assistant coach. I told him that my time is limited but I would be more than willing to help out with coaching tournaments and donating some gear for his son’s team. I went out to a few practices and noticed one kid who was particularly talented. Every time he was on the ice, it seemed as if he always had the puck. In fact, this 9-year old kid achieved a significant milestone by scoring 120 goals in just over 30 games.

His mother was particularly intriguing, she always sat away from her husband who stood motionless behind the glass every game. What’s odd though was that the father of the kid would never show up to any of the tournaments. What made this even more interesting was that whenever the team was away at a tournament his mother seemed to take the drinking a bit too far.

One time she approached the coach and I, “A father from the other team said he was willing to give her 10 grand if my boy plays on his team,” she told us.

The coach rolled his eyes and told her, “First of all your son hasn’t even reached puberty, so who’s to say that your son will score 120 goals next year?”

She leaned in closer to the two of us and I noticed her chest seemed to brush up against his arm, it was obvious the effects of the alcohol were getting to her, she looked at the coach, “If it wasn’t for my son you’d lose every single game. My son’s the best player on the team, he’s the star of the team, and everyone’s looking at him. Why shouldn’t I accept the 10 grand? The money’s in my pocket, not yours.”

Perhaps as an assistant coach it wasn’t my business interfering in the conversation, however my pride took over, and that’s exactly what I did. “You have to look at the costs and benefits. Irrespective of how young your son is there are certain motives of why this man wants your son to play on his team. Perhaps he’s looking at something else rather than your son,” I told her.

I continued, “At this point in the hockey development stage it may not be your son that he’s interested in, he may be interested in other aspects of life. I grant you, if it wasn’t for your son the team would lose more games. But the truth is that in true development, it is the understanding of the game and the skills required to lift oneself in the competitive nature to not only succeed in hockey itself, but in life.”

“The choice is yours, you seem like the type of woman that wants to achieve glory for the sake of glory. Don’t think of it in terms of winning and losing. Success of a player isn’t tied to the winning and losing of a team, especially in minor hockey. When you stop and think of it, some of the best players in the world have played on awful teams, yet have accomplished feats unfathomable to the majority of individuals and have made their money by putting in work,” I stated.

“Have you ever heard of a kid that wasn’t drafted into the NHL because of playing on a losing team when he was 10 years old? The reputation of winning and losing begins in the major junior ranks, and that’s still a long time coming for your boy. Keep him happy, if he’s happy he’s motivated, and that will keep him successful and growing. It’s when the kid loses the desire and the parents try to force motivation on the kid that puts them off the rails and makes them loose cannons doing absurd thing like setting grocery stores on fire.” I told her.

I finally mentioned, “The world of the NHL is always in a state of uncertainty.”

We had a few drinks and a bite to eat and watched one of the hockey games from the tournament. Everyone calmed down by then, and we assumed all would be fine.

Tryout season began, her son was nowhere to be seen. We knew what happened, she took the bait. Only once did I see her son play against our team the following year. We won, but it was tragic seeing the kid not even registering a shot on goal. The mother sat next to the man who gave her the 10 grand, on the other hand, the kid’s father was nowhere to be found.

My friend played the right move. He continues to coach the most successful team in the league with integrity, love, and passion. He made the dominant move that night at the tournament. I’m proud to call him my friend, and I commend him for that. He is my coach.


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No comments yet.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)