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Mets Fan Viewpoint using History of the World Jokes

Updated on May 27, 2014

Starring Count De Monet and King Louis XVI

As the Front Office and Ownership
As the Front Office and Ownership

History of the World Applies

I was just thinking about my Mets Fan Ideology and I really have to question why I’m still a fan of this perennially disappointing ownership and front-office team. The ownership complains that the fans won’t come out to the stadium. The fans claim that if the ownership put a quality product on the field, they would come to the stadium. So what did ownership do?


With a completely disillusioned fan-base in the largest media market in the sport, the New York Mets ownership and front office went out and spent less money on talent than they did last year. That’s right, a bit less than last year. In three years straight, the Mets, through no action of their own, had the batting leader (who left via free agency); a Cy Young winner (who they traded away); and a Stolen Base leader (who they effectively benched during the off-season). Are we actually trying to win games here because it doesn’t really look like it? Here is where the jokes start to fly straight out of History of the World.

Count De Monet: It is said that Mets Fans are revolting! Sandy Alderson

King Louis XVI: You said it! They stink on ice!. Fred Wilpon

They went out and signed an outfielder they didn’t need in Chris Young. He doesn’t hit well, nor does he hit lots of home runs, and he can’t outperform Eric Young’s outfield play which almost landed him a gold-glove nomination. So why did they waste money on him?

They set their sights on a Biogenesis-related shortstop and when he didn’t sign with us, they had no other plan after completely roasting their incumbent shortstop over an open flame in the media. They also did not sign his backups in Omar Quintanilla or Justin Turner. So now they are trying Wilmer Flores there and hoping he isn’t terrible.

They couldn’t trade a first basemen but curiously chose to keep the inferior of the two choices (by most standards). Lucas Duda might turn out to be a good player, but will he out-perform Ike Davis who most observers thought had a lot more potential and already has a 30+home run season under his belt.

King Louis XVI: I love my people! PULL!
That's Mr. Wilpon catapulting the fan-base since he ‘loves’ us so much.

The problem is that it is so many jokes from History of the World apply here. And there are so many other lines from this movie that just fit with how this Mets ownership and front office seem to be from the viewpoint of the humble Mets Fan.

Count de Monet: Your Majesty, you look like the piss-boy! Fans could say to Mr. Wilpon or Mr. Alderson.

King Louis XVI: And you look like a bucket of sh!t! What they essentially tell the fan-base every year.

Of course, Mets fans have been screaming for years for Commissioner Selig to oust the owners due to their complete lack of finances or baseball acumen. The running of the team, even with the respectable Mr. Alderson installed, still seems like a circus out there, and not a good one.

King Louis XVI: It's good to be the king. So says, Mr. Wilpon who can do whatever he
wants with his toys and doesn’t care how broken they are or how much other people want to fix them.

Even the Moses scene where he drops the third tablet of commandments applies. Those are the other rules this team seem to be missing. They dropped them somewhere and decided to just go forth with no replacement commandments.

Captain America Needs to Get Meaner

He's better when surrounded with real players - not minor leaguers....
He's better when surrounded with real players - not minor leaguers....

David Wright is Just Too Nice

OK, I'll say it. The ownership team and front-office must really hate David Wright.

First of all, if you thought for a moment you wanted to keep Mr. Wright as the face of your franchise throughout his career, why did you build a stadium to completely neutralize his effectiveness. The original dimensions of Citi Field had 15-ft tall left field walls and a right-center field power alley that was 415 feet away. So they have now lowered the left field wall to 8 feet and moved the power alley into 390 feet but the psychological damage is more than done.

David Wright is a good hitter, not a pull hitter. He uses the whole field but if he hits balls into the power alley their just fly outs now, not doubles, certainly not homers. He went from hitting 30+ home runs a year to hitting 15 because the stadium is just a terrible hitters park. I don't know if the winds changed direction (as the stadium faces a different direction than Shea) or the more closed atmosphere of Citi Field kills balls but whatever the case, this stadium was not built with him in mind.

You might say that makes sense. You don't build a stadium to suit one player. That's true but do you purposely built it to neutralize the one player on the team you know you want to stick around long term? How does that make any sense?

So the past few years, the Mets have been David Wright and a bunch of has-been and never-will-be's along with some promising minor leaguers who never got seemed to catch on here. They finally declare they are ready to start spending again (which they didn't) and so they go out and sign not one, but two awful hitters to big money. We've already discussed Chris Young's shortcomings but Curtis Granderson, who I like, by the way, was never the answer either. His probable year-end totals of 25 homer runs and a 230 average just won't be enough.

When David Wright was at his best, he had real hitters around him. Carlos Delgado and Carlos Beltran could flat out hit. He also had Jose Reyes on base in front of him and a number two hitter who could move runners around (that's changed over time but Paul LoDuca was really good at this). He'll never admit to this because he's way too nice and diplomatic but they continue to surround David Wright with parts and pieces that they are trying to fit into a team.

It isn't working.

They have a huge amount of pitching prospects - it's time to trade some for a professional hitter or three. Go talk to the Blue Jays about Jose Bautista or Edwin Encarnacion. See if you can pry Giancarlo Stanton from the Marlins. Assess the team from the most objective standpoint you can:

1B: Lucas Duda is a suspect hitter after being in the big leagues since 2010

2B: Daniel Murphy is a good hitter who will hit .300 for the year.

3B: David Wright is the best hitter on the team

SS: Ruben Tejada would be a backup on any other team

LF: Eric Young gets on base enough to steal 40 bases if you play him

CF: Juan Lagares was suspect before this year but has hit well so far. Still very young

RF: Curtis Granderson will thump 25 home runs bit hit .230 for the season, this is who he is.

C: Travis d'Arnaud looks like a good catcher with maybe a passable bat - he hasn't proved that so far though

Bench: Only Bobby Abreu, the 40 year old professional hitter scares anyone. Everybody else is suspect at best.

The starting pitching has been really good so far. It's time to line the bullpen with young fresh arms and trade so of that depth for a real bat. Not a possible bat, a real solid, I know how to get it done bat.

Or else the Mets and their management will simply continue to waste the best years of David Wright's career. Of course, will any of the fans be around for it if they continue to manage the club this way? It's not Terry Collins fault, he can only play the guys he has.

There are no Fair-Weather Mets Fans!!

We live and die for this team because we've been fan's for life. Wouldn't it be nice if the owenrs were as well?


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    • dblyn profile imageAUTHOR


      4 years ago from Staten Island, NY

      Very True - wait till next year!!! I just don't want to be saying it in May!! And the movie is hilarious, though it's a another of Mel Brooks movies that would never have been made in today's very politically correct world. It is, nevertheless, hilarious.

    • brianlokker profile image

      Brian Lokker 

      4 years ago from Bethesda, Maryland

      I never saw the movie, but as a life-long Mets fan, I can still appreciate the jokes as they relate to the Mets. Since moving to the DC area two years ago, I've been tempted to become a Nationals fan, but I guess our curse as Mets fans is that hope never dies!

    • dblyn profile imageAUTHOR


      4 years ago from Staten Island, NY

      Thank you! Yeah, my father was a Brooklyn Dodgers fan so I grew up a Mets fan. That said, the current ownership/front office combo is really not working well and several lines from History of the world just seemed to fit SO WELL!! I thought others would find it funny too..

    • lions44 profile image

      CJ Kelly 

      4 years ago from Auburn, WA

      Love the concept. I'm a Yankee fan but you have my sympathy and respect for the undying loyalty to that organization. I never see Wilpon listed as one of the worst in all of sports? New stadium should mean more revenue to spend and build. Voted up.


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