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Surviving University Rugby (A Fresher's Guide) Part 4 Edward Cider Hands

Updated on June 28, 2017

Cider Hands

During the year there are several seasonal events. Edward Cider Hands tends to be held around the Halloween period. A mean feat of drinking accomplished by duct-taping one two-litre bottle of cider to each hand and finishing them within a two-hour period. Personally I favour Morrison’s own “dry dry dry cider” at under five pound a pop it won’t be too much of a strain on your student loan, however choosing a slightly more expensive cider such as blackthorn or woodpecker with a less generic flavour will make the second half of the two hours significantly more bearable. I highly recommend opening your cider previous to the event to allow the carbon bubbles to diffuse and therefore making consumption less gassy and uncomfortable.

The setting for this event is usually in a student house loft; dark, dirty and filled with junk. If you’re asked to wear a Halloween outfit do so, otherwise you may find yourself with miscellaneous object from the loft duct taped to you as a compromise. Spending a night with an old radiator attached to your back and a drainpipe as an armband is not particularly comfortable. Also it tends to be a tradition that fresher’s are to fashion and wear their own pumpkin helmets for the entirety of the evening. When making your helmet ensure that it fits comfortably onto your head, because you won’t have any free hand to put it back on if it slips. Secondly make it’s not too heavy (a mistake I unfortunately make, leaving the event with a sore neck) and thirdly pad the inside of your pumpkin with tissue paper or anything that will absorb the unfortunate smelling liquid.

Finishing first in this competition is not going to win you a cash prise but it will put your name in the history book for that year and a substantial amount of respect. It is not a mission I suggest you attempt unless you are in possession of a steel gut. My team’s record rests around fifteen minutes which is an absolute recipe for disaster and seems to remind people of previous horror stories of individual being taken to hospital and in the worst case scenario dying from organ failure. Alcohol is a drug and is very rarely classified as one in the minds of many young people. If you’re going to compete in these kinds of events take it light-heartedly and know your limits!

Take your time and use as much of the time you need. An hour is a very respectable time and anywhere between 1:30 and 1:50 is good. Be aware that a large percentage of individuals fail the challenge by either not finishing or by fouling.

Fouls

There are several fouls that can be inflicted whilst playing:

1. To use the toilet you must finish one bottle, failure to do so will result in disqualification.

2. Once a bottle is finished it can be repositioned to the side of the wrist but cannot be removed from the arm.

3. “Chundering” puts you out of the running’s and means you cannot complete the challenge.

4. Obvious intentional spilling of cider leads to immediate disqualification.

5. Being caught watering down alcohol at any point also leads to disqualification.

There will most likely be someone assigned to check the quantity of alcohol left in your containers when you leave the room for toilet breaks. I highly recommend that you wear comfortable clothing that you don’t mind being damaged or defaced as both of these are likely to happen. It’s also not a good idea to do the challenge whilst ill as I unfortunately found out. Not only does the alcohol irritate a sore throat but the amount of dust and dirt in student lofts are no good for already unhealthy lungs. It is highly likely that a lot of your team will go out clubbing after this event, it is up to your discretion whether or not you feel up to joining them.


Amy Wine Hands

An adaptation of Edward cider hand is Amy Wine Hands which is the same in structure but using two bottles of wine as opposed to cider. Some believe a harsher challenge however the un-carbonated wine causes less adverse gas than the latter.

Hangover Tips

The morning after is going to be harsh. Here are some tips to try and counteract your hangover:

1. Check your lectures beforehand, make sure you’re not missing anything essential to your course the day afterwards because the main think that will make you feel better is a long sleep.

2. Drinking Chocolate milk is great for rehydrating you and it washes that rough taste out of your mouth, make sure you have some stocked in your fridge.

3. Hair of the dog is a myth; give your body at least 48 hours to recover before drinking again.

4. Don’t drink a lot of caffeine; a strong coffee will only dehydrate you even more.

5. Eat a small amount of good quality food with high mineral content to restore your body and avoid nausea.

Affordable Healthy Food for Students

On pitch you need to fuel your body efficiently, harder said than done on a tight budget. Below are some good quality foods at prices that your student loan can handle:

1. Birchwood Turkey breast from Lidl

2. ERIDANOUS Greek Yogurt (1kg)from Lidl

3. Tuna flakes in brine (1.7kg) from Bookers

4. Savers chicken fillets (1kg) from Morrison’s

5. Easy cook brown rice (1kg) from Tesco’s

6. Farmhouse mixed vegetables (1.2kg) from Tesco’s

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