Time For A Name Change To The Boy Scouts of Straight America!
Once more the Boy Scouts have restated their policy that they will not allow any homosexuals into their organization. Is this America? You bet? Do they have a right to do it? I don’t know their bylaws or how they’re funded but my guess would be that they’re allowed to do whatever they want because there was a Supreme Court vote that said they could. However I do remember Philadelphia no longer allowing the Boy Scouts of America to use their public buildings for free considering it was a public building and they were excluding some of the public. The city did offer to allow them to continue to have their meetings there if they paid a rental fee which seemed fair to me. However anyone who has ever read any of my writing knows that this will not be about court decisions or the history of “Scouting” no, it’ll be yet another war cry – “Time for a name change to the Boy Scouts of Straight America!” Don’t Get Me Started!
First let me say that the first thing that went through my mind when I read that the Boy Scouts of Straight America (BSSA) was going to continue its ban of gays I thought of my grandmother. Back when she would watch the Mike Douglas show every afternoon seeing guests like Johnny Mathis she would say, “He’s in his thirties and he’s never been married, do you think???” She never finished the sentence but we all knew she was wondering if celebs like Mr. Mathis were gay. Another thing she used to say to me was, “The gays, you know they’re everywhere.” She didn’t say it in a derogatory way (I think mostly because she understood that they were indeed everywhere including standing right in front of her) it was more of a “just letting us know” kind of thing. All that to say, that if the Grand Poobahs of The Boy Scouts really think they don’t already have gays in their organization then they need to contact my dead grandmother who would let them know, “the gays are everywhere.”
Seriously, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. Look in the newspaper when they post the photos of the newly appointed Eagle Scouts. It’s like playing that game from grade school. Remember duck, duck, goose? It’s played the same way except from the looks of those spectacular scouts you’d be playing, nerd, nerd, gay! After all, has HGTV (Home Gay Television) not taught us anything about how crafty and ingenious us gays (that are everywhere) are?
The Scouts used to say that they didn’t want gays in their organization because they would molest the boys and turn them into a new breed of gays who can find their way out of the forest or something. Now the Scouts say that they feel as though they don’t want gays in their organization because things like sexuality should be addressed and discussed at home, not around a campfire. I think we all know why they want to give the appearance of no gays in their organization. They’re bigoted, old farts who don’t see that your sexuality doesn’t make you a criminal or sex offender (we leave that for the Jerry Sanduskys of the world who are protected by their universities, closeted politicians and movie stars).
So while I do believe in their rights to exclude whomever they choose I think they’re making a big mistake. Think of the lesbian Den Mother they ousted during all of this…can anyone teach boys about camping better than a lesbian? I don’t think so. And while we’re at it, let’s be like Philadelphia, since they refuse to include all of America, let’s make them use a name that represents who they will allow to be included in their ranks, time for a name change to the Boy Scouts of Straight America!
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An acquired taste, like Tab cola, Some Like It Scott is one gay man's experiences with love, life and things that make him crazy, all done to a musical theatre soundtrack.