Cult's Top Ten Lucha Underground Dream Matches
As I was finishing up watching last night's unbelievable Lucha Underground episode, I began to ask myself what type of dream matches would I like to see from the organization. I know, the LU is great at giving you exactly what you want, but there can still always be more right?. So for tonight, I'm going to give you my top ten dream matches for Lucha Underground. This wasn't an easy list to make, to the point that I consulted a few readers of mine on Twitter for some advice on what to put in. As per usual, if your dream match or your favorite wrestler was left off, it just means I ran out of room. Seriously, there's so many great potential match ups that the LU can give us, ten may be too small a list. But that's a discussion for another time. Let's break this down. ON WITH THE SHOW!!!
Cult's Top Ten Lucha Underground Dream Matches
10. Jack Evans vs. Angelico
Remember a few weeks ago when Jack Evans debuted in the LU, looking like he raided Angelico's wardrobe? Well, it actually makes sense, because Angelico and Evans were tag team partners down in AAA, and even won the AAA Tag Team Championships last year. With that built in history and the fact that they're both literally insane, who wouldn't want to see this? Plus, you know Evans, the man, myth and legend that he is, will do absolutely everything he can to top his former partner's amazing theatrics.
9. Cage vs. Mil Muertes
Could this end up being the battle between the most athletic big men in wrestling history? Serious question. What gets me the most excited about this match is the fact that Cage is likely the only guy in the LU right now, physically and athletically, that can hang with Mil. In fact, other than Mil and Angelico, I'd argue that Cage has been the most impressive dude in the Temple recently, especially since he found the perfect balance between his power moves and his ability to fly. Put him in the ring with the Man of A Thousand Deaths, and I think you get a borderline classic. At the very least, you'll get a dude who can look Mil in the eye and not be afraid of him at first. I can't promise anything after that!
8. Johnny Mundo vs. Fenix
Let's get this spoiler out of the way; this is the only place on this list you're going to see either Mundo or Fenix. It's nothing personal; I like Mundo (especially his new rudo character) and I really like Fenix. The problem is that there's no match I'm dying to see them in at the moment, likely because Fenix will be taking a long vacation and because I've seen Mundo fight everyone from CM Punk to Alberto El Patron over the years (this is the same reason Patron doesn't make the list. But you already knew that. Or did you?). Thus, they only get this spot, against each other. Hey, it could be worse; either one of these guys could be Bael right now.
In all seriousness, I think this match could be a massive, MASSIVE barn burner. I don't believe these two have wrestled before, and even if they have, they certainly haven't since Mundo turned rudo a few weeks back. And that's the key; Mundo's work thus far has been so good and so different as a bad guy that I think it could create a really interesting dynamic between himself and Fenix. On one hand, you'd have Fenix doing all his awesome aerial maneuvers. On the other hand, you'd have Mundo and his new ground and pound offense, using his aerial moves only when necessary. I think these two could really tell a good story in the ring if given the chance. And thankfully, I think they will at some point. You know, if they can put Fenix back together again physically and mentally. Poor dude is more broken than Bruce Wayne in Knightfall. Yes I know, I used that reference already this week, but it still fits!
7. Vampiro vs. Pentagon Jr
There's been a lot of great moments on Lucha Underground this first season, so many that it would take me a year to list them all here. One of the most underrated moments however, was Vampiro's reaction to Pentagon Jr. trying to break ring announcer Melissa Santos' arm. I don't know if it was because of the situation or because Vamp was one of my favorite heroes when I grew up watching WCW, but when he got up from his chair to head to the ring, it was a legitimate goose bumps/mark out moment for me. I honestly don't even care that Vamp is in his late 40's and isn't the same guy he was. I would pay top dollar to see this match. The story of a returning Vampiro trying to put an end to the violent run of Pentagon Jr. would be top quality storyline. It also probably end up with the reveal of Pentagon's master, the only mystery angle that comes close to being as intriguing as "Who is Matanza?".
6. Prince Puma vs. Angelico
Myself and my buddy Lazyking have recently discussed who the most athletic guy in the Temple is. He thinks its Puma, I (shockingly to all who read me) think it's Angelico. It may ultimately be neither of them (hell Evans, Fenix, Mundo), but I still think we're owed a match to find out. Not only would the aerial assaults be awesome, but so would the kicks. Remember, Angelico has a very decent kick offense, and Puma just showed us yesterday that he can do kicks that have never been seen before by anyone else. Of course, we'd all probably end up caring more about which one can do a better, higher jump over the turnbuckle to the floor, but hey, a little variety doesn't hurt.
5. Son of Havoc vs. Jack Evans
One of these men is the people's champion of the Temple, Lucha Underground's ultimate underdog. The other is a guy who has wrestled one match, refers to himself as the man, the myth, the legend and the dude who is lucha libre. Sign me up right now. Really, just sign me up for more Jack Evans. One week of him isn't enough! I need more of his break dancing, unbelievable cockiness and 450 splashes off railings. And I also need Son of Havoc to welcome him to the jungle as only the man from the open road can.
4. Prince Puma vs. Mil Muertes
We have arrived to Mil Muertes country! And after last night, you could make a very compelling argument that this match should be number one. The dynamic is great; Mil Muertes is now the unstoppable monster, armed with Catrina, the Skeletor Army and a whole lot of fear factor. But Prince Puma is a challenger who doesn't scare easily, is slowly starting to come into his own with every title defense, and has the same set of skills (and then some) that made Fenix so difficult for Mil to deal with. Oh, and he also has Konnan, the best manager in the LU and a dude who knows every trick in the book (seriously, he's Mexico's Ric Flair. Forget the Hogan comparisons). I'm not ready to put it at number one just yet, but there's no doubt in my mind that this would be a classic matchup. Could we perhaps see it before the season is over (hint hint)?
3. Matanza vs. Mil Muertes
That's right; one of my dream matches involves a dude who we have yet to see on camera and whose identity has yet to be revealed. Yes, I put this on here at number three and didn't include Alberto El Patron off the list. Go ahead, let it out the insults. Fire me!
Look, after last night, I don't think it really matters that we have yet to see Matanza's true identity or not. What's perfectly clear is that the two baddest motherfuckers in the Temple are Mil and Matanza. For crying out loud, one of them rises from the dead, has a legion of death followers and powerbombs you through rooftops, while the other either eats or slices and dices people that cross the boss. Get these two into the ring yesterday! Chances are that someone would go through the roof of that closest/bathroom/whatever room, another window in Cueto's office would be broken, the LU announcer's table would break for the first time in recorded history (that might be the only entity in LU that's still undefeated!) and somebody might legit die. And I'm not talking Bael being written off due to cannibalism/machete. In short, if you don't want to see the type of apocalypse this match would create, you're crazier than Matanza and Mil combined. Now let's hope they don't flay me for putting this at number three!
2. Son of Havoc vs. Ivelisse vs. Angelico
Yes, the lone non singles match on this list is a triple threat featuring our current LU Trios Champions. And as much as I love these three together (I like to call them the Greatest Trios Team to Ever Live), I'd love it even more to see them all tangle. And it's going to happen. The three of them still don't like each other, and one of these days Ivelisse is likely going to knock both Angelico and Havoc silly with one of her crutches. This match will happen, and trust me when I say it'll be an absolute classic. You know how all three of them are trying to prove they're the best member of the team? Well imagine that, only they're trying to prove that while kick each other's asses instead of someone else's. I think Angelico may actually try to pull a shooting star press off Cueto's office for this one. In which case, we might as well just call up Zack Snyder so he can fire Henry Cavill and give Angelico the role he was born to play; Superman.
1. Angelico vs. Mil Muertes
I know, I know, I know; this reeks of a biased pick. And I don't blame you for thinking that. It's obvious to anyone who reads me that Angelico is my favorite guy in wrestling right now. Not just Lucha Underground, wrestling. I wrote a column breaking down his two unbelievable dives if that doesn't make it clear to you. It's also obvious that Mil Muertes, especially after last night, is a candidate to be an opponent in every single one of these dream matches. So go ahead and write this off as a fan boy being a fan boy. Trust me, I can take it, never mind the fact that it's my list and I'll do what I want.
Alright, in all seriousness, you want to know why this match is number one for me? It's not just that I'm an Angelico fan or a believer in the cult of Mil Muertes. It's because you won't find any wrestlers in the Temple hotter than these two. The stuff Angelico has done in the past month or so is unlike anything else we're seeing in wrestling today. No one, not Puma, Fenix, WWE's Adrian Neville or any other wrestler on the planet is doing what Angelico is doing, and no one honestly has since Jeff Hardy's initial WWE run. As for Mil, he is such a fully realized badass, such a fully realized character that you can't help but be drawn in by him. Hell, last night against Fenix (one of the most popular wrestlers in the Temple mind you), Mil was getting Punk in Chicago cheers, something only Brock Lesnar can get as a 100% bad ass heel these days. You combine those two aspects together, add the fact that Angelico wouldn't fear Mil (if you're not afraid to jump 30 feet in the air, you're not afraid of anything honestly) and you've got what I think would be the best match Lucha Underground has ever seen, provided it was given the right amount of time. And that is why it's number one, aside from my own personal feelings. Plus, how awesome would it be for Angelico to try his crossbody again, only for Mil to catch him? They would have to rebuild the Temple, the pop would be so loud.
That's a wrap guys. I'm off till tomorrow, likely a Community column and maybe, just maybe, another entry in the Football Diaries. Hope you enjoyed the lucha stuff today. Till next time, SUMMER SUMMER SUMMER!!!