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What NOT to Name Your Sports Team

Updated on July 1, 2009

The Evergreen State College Logo

top 10 worst sports names...

I work in an almost all male dominated profession, but I confess, I don't like sports. Yet, it is the most favorite subject discussed in my office and in the field. So, I pondered what would be the craziest names a sports team could acquire. The internet yeilded me these results:

The New York Violets

  • in 1983 after 12 years of not playing, they chose to dawn a mascot that walks, talks and wears a huge purple flower on it's head. The mascot has tight green bodysuit, a purple necklace, and purple face paint. Needless to say, they lost in 1984, when they returned to play. There was talk that they should change their name to a Bobcat, but the name had already had a trademark from a cartoon character.

The Rainbow Warriors

  • In 1923 the football team from Hawaii, the "Fighting Deans" fought a notorious battle with Oregan State and won. There was talk that a rainbow appeared during the last touchdown. So, victory was said to be won when rainbows materialized and thus, the "Rainbow Warriors" was adopted.

  • In 2000, the name was changed to "Warriors" and the logo wasn't a rainbow anymore, just a green H insignia. There ws too much confusion between the sports team and the gay pride logo.

MIT Engineers

  • This team played up the nerdiness of the school.

  • The only fear tactic of being the "Engineers" is that the starting pay for these grads will be so much more than the starting pay of most sports marketing majors they play against!

Pace Setters from Pace University

  • This would make anyone roll over and fall asleep!

Long Beach State Dirtbags

  • The formal name fro the baseball team is the 49'ers, but they have gone by Dirtbags since the 1980's.

  • The name came from being soaked in dirt because of playing on a dirt field.

The St.Louis College of Pharmacy Eutetics

  • Eutetics is a pharmaseutical term for combining two solids to form a liquid.

  • To add injury to insult, their mascot is a furry brown gremlin with yellow eyes...scary!

UC Santa Cruz Banana Slugs

  • They joined the NCAA Division III in 1981.

  • Their first choice was the sea lion.

Grays Harbor College Chokers

  • Wow, what can you say about a team that conjurs up thoughts about murders, cheap 80's necklaces, and stressed out people with anger management issues?

  • A choker in the Northwest is actually a cable wrapped around a log to make it easier for a logger to transport the wood elsewhere.

  • The mascot is a half naked Irish or Dutch looking man with a rope or chain swinging around. He's called Charlie Choker.

University of Evansville Purple Aces

  • The basketball team orginally began as the Pioneers, but when losing coach from Lousiville made a wise crack in 1925 that Evansville were like 5 aces in a sleeve, it stuck.

  • The local newspaper likes it because it's easier to squeeze into the headlines.

My favorite team is the following because you can't say they are clueless on how bad their team or their fight song sounds!

Evergreen State College Geoducks

  • From Olympia, Washington, the native "duck" is actually a clam, the largest in the world at 1-3 pounds.

  • Their school website won't provide a link to a phto because of the phallic nature of their appearance.

  • The school's fight song is:

Go Geoducks Go

Through the mud and sand

Let's Go!

Siphon high, squirt it out

Swivel all about

Let it all hang out

Go Geoducks Go!

Stretch your necks when the tide

Is low

Go Geoducks Go

Through the mud and sand

Let's Go!

Siphon high, squirt it out

Swivel all about

Let it all hang out

Go Geoducks Go!


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    • AsherKade profile image

      AsherKade 8 years ago from Texas

      I am sure that was the point Beth :P

    • Beth100 profile image

      Beth100 8 years ago from Canada

      Pretty memorable

    • AsherKade profile image

      AsherKade 8 years ago from Texas

      I love your poetry on my bad now we are even!


    • manlypoetryman profile image

      manlypoetryman 8 years ago from (Texas !) Boldly Writing Poems Where No Man Has Gone Before...

      Good one, AsherKade...Jump started my day with laughing on this Hub. Thanks...

    • Eaglekiwi profile image

      Eaglekiwi 8 years ago from -Oceania

      lol good hub ,made me laugh, was trying to think of some back home (NZ)...will have to sleep on it ,lol