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What if Disney would put a Once Upon a Time Land in their parks? 6 new rides that would fit perfectly

Updated on November 28, 2014
A Once Upon a Time Land in Disneyland... Why not?
A Once Upon a Time Land in Disneyland... Why not?

If you're a Disney-fan, chances are you watch Once Upon a Time. It's a fun show
that tells the story of what would happen if characters from fairy tale lore
would one day end up in our world. The show is popular, giving us new versions of
popular fairy tale characters like Snow White, the Evil Queen, Rumplestiltskin,
Belle, and many more. The writers of the show change things up a little bit here
and there, making certain good characters evil, while some evil characters turn
to the good side. It's an interesting mix with fun storylines, not all as
successful as others, and at one time it even had a spin off that mixed Alice in
Wonderland with Aladdin (which sadly didn't last long). It's a show that is known
both for it's cool variations on classic characters, and for it's pretty bad
special effects. This season introduced the characters from Frozen to the show,
this time not changing that much with how we know the characters from the movie.
Once Upon a Time is an ABC-show, and with ABC being owned by Disney, they could
technically very well use these characters in the theme parks. I am not saying
Disney should open up a Once Upon A Time Land in their parks. I think it would be
confusing to have this whole other chronology of fairy tale characters mixed in
with the old school characters we all know and love from the Disney movies and
classic fairy tales. Still, it's fun to imagine.

So, what rides would fit in this new land?

Captain Hook, who is one of the most popular characters on the show.
Captain Hook, who is one of the most popular characters on the show.

1 A Peter Pan dark ride

Yes, there is a Peter Pan dark ride in the parks already, but you would need a
ride like this just for the fact that Peter Pan actually is a character on the
dark side of things in Once Upon a Time. As a matter of fact, it doesn't get much
darker than Pan, who even makes Rumplestiltskin and Captain Hook shake their
knees whenever he's around. This ride could start off with Peter Pan fighting
Captain Hook, like we know from the animated movie. But when Peter wins the
fight, he gives you the evil eye, and the jolly atmosphere of the beginning of
the ride descends from there. Through a nightmarish Neverland, with Peter Pan's
shadow gliding menacingly over the wall next to the little ship you ride the
attraction in. It doesn't get much better as you enter Skull Rock, and the Little
Boys swarm your ship, but just as they are about to grab you, Tinkerbell swoops
in and sprinkles the ship with fairy dust. You rise to the skies, with Pan and
his shadow chasing behind you. Rumplestiltskin and The Evil Queen (who isn't
really evil anymore in the series) battle him off, and then Captain Hook takes
you back to the relative safety of Storybrooke. Not really a cheerful ride, but
that's not a theme you're going to find much of in this park anyway.

Crazy old Rumplestiltskin...
Crazy old Rumplestiltskin...

2 The Rumplestiltskin Rollercoaster

Or, the Rumplecoaster, though that name sounds a bit, well, off, honestly. Of all
the characters on the show, you could show that Rumple's ride has been the
craziest. Going from a lowly, despised farmer, he is now one of the most powerful
magicians in the world. His journey through the show would make a great coaster.
With great highs, and deep lows, Rumple's ride is something you won't easily
forget. It's probably best as a dark coaster, since the dark side is where Rumple
spends most of his time anyway. And during the ride, the speakers on the side of
the headrest would play Rumple's maniacal laughing to get you more and more in
the mood. Lots of flashy effects and smoke finish the ride perfectly.

Brave Prince Charming. Bit boring though...
Brave Prince Charming. Bit boring though...

3 How to become a noble prince

Over in the Disney parks in the States, they have something called the Jedi
Academy, which is sort of like a show, sort of like a fun training exercise for
kids who have always dreamed of becoming a Jedi themselves. Be it for the good
side, or the evil side. You could switch this around a little bit and tweak it
into a sort of like Prince's Academy, where the Noble Prince, or David as he's
called in the show, teaches you how to become one as well.
You will learn how to snare a princess, fight evil monsters and be a bit crap at
it, how to be charming but a bit boring, and how it's possible to have a daughter
that is actually only a few years younger than you. Yeah, it might be a bit of a
confusing show, but then again, so was most of season two and three.

Don't look now! It's the Evil Queen!
Don't look now! It's the Evil Queen!

4 The Major's Mansion

Okay, I know that in season four Snow White became the mayor of Storybrooke, but
in the first three seasons this was The Evil Queen's job. And even though she has
more or lessed turned to the good side, it would still be a brilliantly scary
ride. Watch as the Evil Queen rips the hearts out of the people she loves! Shiver
as you see the Evil Queen smirk into the magic mirror! And thrill as you see The
Evil Queen and Rumplestiltskin battle it out. Well, all they really do is moan
and argue a bit, but if it's dark enough inside the mansion, it'll be scary
enough anyway. One cool extra thing could be that while you are waiting in line,
there will be dolls with hearts that you can rip out and crush yourself.

They all look pretty cool in their Frozen cosplay costumes.
They all look pretty cool in their Frozen cosplay costumes.

5 The Frozen Experience

You didn't think there wouldn't be a Frozen ride, did you? The biggest animated
movie ever made, even though they twisted the story of the movie into another
storyline that feels ill fitted, but which you will go along with anyway because
the show is fun. There wouldn't have to be much to it, because at the moment the
attraction with the biggest waiting times in every Disney park is the 'having
your picture taken with the princesses' photo moment. In Disneyland Paris,
waiting times have reached 300 minutes. Yes, for having your picture taken. The
twist in Once Upon a Time Land is that at certain times Anna will disappear, and
be replaced by Emma, who will look worried in every picture you take with her.

This was the really annoying one.
This was the really annoying one.

6 The Wicked Witches Spectacular

There have been so many different witches in this show, that it's easy to fill a 45 minute stage show with just introducing them all, and then explaining how they are different from the witches that everybody knows from the fairy tales and Disney movies. When that's done, the witches will have a bit of a song and dance and it's all over again, leaving everybody with their heads spinning, wishing they had just stayed in Fantasyland.

So, for which ride will you get a Fast Pass right away?

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