8 Worst Fashion Trends of All Time
Life is full of choices. We make good ones, we make bad ones, and, when it comes to fashion, we make horrifying ones that result in ripping up photos and erasing entire years of our lives. So while you’ll never look back in horror at your Crumpet knitwear, you’re probably not proud of the time you wore backwards jeans to your graduation ceremony or platform sneakers to your sister’s wedding. Here’s a look back at the worst fashion trends of all time. Are you guilty?
Any trend inspired by tween rappers has got to be bad. Backwards clothing, made famous by Kris Kross, is no exception. It started off with jeans in the early 90s, then trickled down to shirts, jackets and even earrings. Even though it took people twice as long to get dressed in the morning (ever tried to do up backwards jeans? Not easy), this trend lasted longer than Mondetta flag shirts. And that's impressive.
Anime Contact Lenses
Lady Gaga’s bug-eyed “Bad Romance” look is most likely computer generated, but it still inspired fans to rush out and buy their own anime eyes. Circle lenses, as they’re technically called, make the eyes seem larger by covering not only the iris, but also part of the whites of the eyes. While you may be loving your anime look, novelty lenses aren’t health regulated so you’re putting yourself at risk for corneal infections and conjuctivitis. Good times, plus you look dumb.
What's worse than sporting tooth jewelry? Um, nothing. The only that comes close is Susan Sarandon wearing a bracelet made from her children’s teeth. At first glance, diamonds, dollar signs, birthstones or whatever always look like a hole, or leftover lunch, or general poor hygiene. So awkward, especially when people fork over a lot of money for them.
Voluntary Receding Hairlines
Back in the Reinaissance days, high foreheads were the epitome of beauty and elegance. If you weren’t lucky enough to be born with a fivehead, a la Tyra Banks, you had to pluck to get the look. And not just the hair on your head--your eyebrows and eyelashes too. Good times.
The Spice Girls brought many wonderful things to our lives, like Girl Power, Union Jack mini dresses, Zig-a-zig-ah and, eventually, gratuitous photos of David Beckham. So aside from their obvious lack of singing talent, what was their downfall? Platform sneakers. Gross gross gross. I don't care how sporty or scary or ginger you are, platform sneakers will always be hideous.
Finally, a trend so bad that it’s against the law (well, in some places anyway). The practice of intentionally letting your underwear hang out was incredibly popular in the 90s, and even now it’s hard to walk down the street without seeing grodie boxer shorts puffing out of even grodier pants. And ladies, although your pants may not be saggy, whale tales count too.
It’s impossible to use the term “mullet” in a positive light, even when it’s used to describe a skirt seen all over the Spring 2012 runways. They’re a new dimension of awfulness. Not pretty.
There are cool shoulder pads—the spiky, funky ones that are clearly meant to look ridiculous—and then there are the ones that simply make you look like a linebacker. Dynasty, the 80s prime time soap opera about scheming oil tycoons in Denver, was all about should pad driven formal wear and power suits. Ugly then, even uglier now.