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Men, How Not To Wear Women's Panties

Updated on October 21, 2009
This picture is only here because I find the look of stunned terror on the woman's face as Trinny and Susannah poke her breasts to be amusing in the extreme...
This picture is only here because I find the look of stunned terror on the woman's face as Trinny and Susannah poke her breasts to be amusing in the extreme...

By now, most of us have been exposed to horror tv shows along the lines of 'What Not To Wear', where smug fashionistas take shabby people under their wing, stuff them, sausage style, into some support underwear and dress them in vaguely age appropriate clothing whilst squealing about how much younger they look now. This article does not follow along those lines, because those are the lines that lead to madness.

Instead of being made to strip off and stand behind a silhouetted curtain for the amusement of two crones, (if you don't know what I am talking about there, be glad, for you have never been exposed to the true horrors of Trinny and Susannah,) Let us consider this little faux pas a lingerie loving man recently made:

On August 13, 2009 in Salem, Oregon, Randall Giesbers stepped into the male panty wearers hall of shame when he was caught during a home invasion. He was found wearing just a pair of panties, a pair of panties belonging to one of the owners of the home he had broken into.

Local news reported:

“A Marion County man is charged with numerous counts of theft and burglary. He is accused of stealing women’s underwear, and he was caught wearing it.

Randall Giesbers of Salem was arrested at his neighbor’s home Monday night wearing nothing but his female neighbor’s panties. The woman’s boyfriend caught him, wrestled him to the ground and held him until police arrived.

In Giesber’s garage, Marion County deputies discovered several large garbage bags full of women’s underwear, leading them to believe there are more victims. “

This is a very good example of how not to buy women's panties, mostly because it doesn't so so much involve buying women's panties as it does breaking into other people's homes, stealing their underwear and soiling it beyond all possible hope of repair.

It's also a very good example of how not to wear women's panties. One should never wear women's panties unexpectedly in the bedroom of a stranger's home. It is considered in polite circles to be a fairly uncouth and inappropriate manner of wearing women's clothing. Men wishing to wear women's panties are generally advised to wear panties they have bought themselves and to wear these panties only in their own homes, unless they happen to be fully clothed, in which case they may feel free to wear them anywhere.


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    • profile image

      Lingerie Wearer 

      9 years ago

      Why pilfer when there is so much in the way of sexy lingerie you can buy and then enjoy wearing ... even more so when it is in the right size, yours!

    • profile image

      Mike 

      9 years ago

      Hope, you left out one other important detail from the story. It seems that the suspect was pilfering his treasures in his own neighborhood.

      The mug shot of the guy was enough to give you nightmares too.

    • profile image

      ILoveLingerie 

      9 years ago

      Serves him right to get caught, you don't wear others underwear (unless they allow it)!

    • Hope Alexander profile imageAUTHOR

      Hope Alexander 

      9 years ago

      Fire Sky, read the article, not just the headline. It's obvious when you leave a comment without having read the article at all.

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