My legacy. The meaning of life according to my mother's etiquette and lingerie.
"If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?" ~anonymous quote~
What happened to those younger years? What happened to all those years when you could wear pretty lingerie, those lacey pretty garments, in all different types and colors.
What happened to all those younger years when I could FEEL pretty? Something sure happened. I am just not sure what. I think it has to do with my legacy.
I remember back to those days with a longing sigh. I remember back to those days when frilly was in, and pretty was its partner. I remember getting dressed for a special occasion and your bra and panties matched your outfit, in pretty display. Lace, satin, silk, pretty hi-cuts, low-cuts, bikinis, thongs, hipsters, boy-cuts, and now I wear granny panties. Yes, those HUGE tent size granny panties.
You know what I am talking about, those GREAT big panties that come in a variety of colors, that you pull up to your neck, all the while thinking to yourself, “Forget about panty lines, I just hope they don’t peek out over the neckline of my shirt!”
Sure, they come in a variety of colors and fabrics, but my point being, is they are still going to have to be pulled up so high that you can use them as a dickey!
They may come in pretty colors, and pretty fabrics, but they have SO much material, you could make a tent with them, and still have enough material left over to make the awning.
And I am asking you why, why oh why do they have to come in CUTE little prints? They look like something you would put on a toddler! Not the size of course, just those cute little prints. I used to think granny panties were for women over 60 and now I am going to protest, I am not there yet!
I remember wearing pretty panties and now I am stuck with granny panties. Anything else is less than comfortable now. I think I will leave my collection to my daughters because if I hear one more time, “MOM, your underpants look like five people can fit in those!” I am going to scream.
But then I remember when I used to say the same about my mother.
And bras! Egad! That is another subject all together! I remember when I was young and my mother took me for my first bra. I thought she was out of her mind, I had nothing, and therefore I needed to wear nothing to cover it up. Why in the world did she have to take me to the local dress shop, (We didn’t have Wal-Mart back then), and have me fitted for a bra. We had to go into this fitting room and then the saleslady would come in with her measuring tape and talk about embarrassing! I wondered what she was measuring! It sure couldn’t have been me, I had nothing to measure!
But lo and behold, I was fitted for my first training bra. I was mortified and shell shocked, and I think that traumatized me for the rest of my life. I would try everything to get out of wearing a bra. Over the years it changed from bra to bra, colors, padded bra, non-padded bra, training bra, demi-cup bra, maternity bra, strapless bra, under wire bra, sport bra, front closure bra, back closure bra, push-up bra, shelf-bra, water bra, built-in bra, the list goes on and on. Materials, fabrics, different kind of straps! Yikes! And I still did not need one! All through the years, I bought them; yes I did, why, because my mother told me to! You couldn’t leave the house unless you had a bra and clean underpants on!
I did not need a bra, not then. I actually did not need a bra until I reached my 50’s and that was only because I was a late bloomer, (Thyroid condition) and I still rebelled! I wanted no part of those things I had to wear years and years and years! I opted for tank tops. They are comfortable, I can get them in all materials and comfort, and they hide the granny panties.
Until this past week, I have to go to my cousin’s daughters wedding, and my dress needs a bra. Well not my dress, me. I cannot help it, it is ingrained into me, that proper ladies MUST have proper attire. I had to dig one out of my dresser, and tried it on, and thought to myself, “I have to endure this for HOW many hours?” Suck it up buttercup. Your mother would have a fit if she caught you without one.
And you ask how would she ever know? She will ask. I know, I am 52 years old and she will ask if I have dressed according to my upbringing.
Oh and we mustn’t forget slips. Here we go again. Slips, yes when wearing a dress of a skirt, I had to wear a slip. And when I mentioned this to my daughter of the ripe age of 20, she actually asked me what a slip was. I told her to go and ask her grandmother.
I don’t even own one now. It would be like putting a sausage in a casing. Not really, but it would sure feel that way. I used to own half-slips and full-slips. In many colors and many fabrics. I never had a clue what they were for, or why they existed. I merely wore one because my mother told me to.
So I researched it, they are worn as an undergarment to help the dress or skirt to hang properly. They are worn to help prevent the fabric of the dress or skirt to chafe your skin. They are worn to help keep you warm. They are worn to keep perspiration off fine fabrics.
I wore one because I was told to. And don’t even try to find one now, unless you are looking at vintage clothing! Not sure they make them anymore!
I know that they make pretty lingerie for ladies my age. There is a plethora of choices, we have corsets, camisoles, body shapers, garters & stockings, and the list goes on and on and on. And I guess I should be thankful I wasn’t born in the era of girdles or full-length petticoats.
I guess I will just be satisfied with my granny panties being my only undergarment; after all they serve multi-purpose uses. They can be used as camisoles, and panties all in one. They sure go up far enough!
Gee, thanks mom.
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