Sure, lye is dangerous. But fat + lye = soap. Period. If there is no lye, it is not soap! A chemical reaction takes place when you make soap. It's called 'soaponification.' The ingredients are no longer what they were. They are now soap. This homemade soap will be better for problem skin than any store bought 'detergent' bars. Purchase hand made soap from a fair, boutique, or market and try a little. See what happens.
For very sensitive skin, I would make the soap using anise as the essential oil. A young lady that I know has trouble with all sorts of cleaning products but loves my soap!
Good luck to you, Billie!