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Retro Rednecks

Updated on September 22, 2014
Rednecks are VERY retro!
Rednecks are VERY retro!

Rednecks, Recycling and Retro

Rednecks are naturals at recycling, ya see. If retro means something that was outdated and has become popular once again... well to a redneck there ain't NOTHING that's outdated. They'll recycle and upcycle just about any ole thang. That's just how they roll. You will see a gazillion examples of this below.

Those rednecks have been around for more than a coon's age mostly mindin' their own business, but hells bells ... just LOOK below to see what those clever ole rednecks are up to these days!

Being a redneck is so much more than just driving a pick-up truck and naming your dog Bubba, ya see. A true redneck does not feel the need to impress people with the outward trappings of superficial wealth.You'll get a kick outta these innovative redneck ideas, and you can be dang sure they ALL are made in the USA. So let's roll.

Think Twice about Rednecks

Don't be too quick to whitetrash these rednecks.

Rednecks tend to be considered dumb hillbillies, country folk who don't know nothin' and are just not quite right.

Well we wanna show you some redneck accomplishments here and ask that you consider their ideas for the following:

uniqueness, usefulness, creativity, humor, recycling efforts, budget, think green, or whatever else comes to mind as you view them.

You'll get to vote on your favorite with a quick click and find some other surprises at the end.

The Retro Redneck Awards

Scroll through these entries.

Then cast YOUR vote at the end

Redneck Cell Phone

Keep hands free while driving.

More important things to hold

than a cell phone.

Redneck Horseshoes

Lots of things come in the shape of horseshoes, and a toilet seat is one of them.

Well we KNOW that rednecks love horshoes, but THIS is just plum clever, dontcha think? Who needs to go out and buy horseshoes when people throw away their old toilet seats? They are lighter and easier to toss, also bigger so they make one humdinger of a dead ringer.

redneck
redneck

Redneck Limo

Rednecks think outside the box about a stretch limo, ya know...

Check this out! Why pay for a limo when junk yards are just plum full of car parts just begging for a home? Recycling at its best, I tell ya. Nobody will have another limo like THIS one, now ain't that the truth?

This baby is sure to be a collector's item, a limited edition - limited to ONE!

Redneck Birthday Cake

Ever been to a redneck birthday party?

Buba lights the birthday candles in STYLE!

redneck
redneck

Redneck Yacht

Luxury boat, retro redneck style

Boy howdy, we've had more fun on this baby than you can shake a stick at.

Me and Bobby Jo built us this here luxury boat, and the redneck babes are all over us! Swweeeet!

redneck
redneck

Redneck Palm Pilot

No high tech gadgets required, retro rednecks got it covered.

No high tech gadgets needed.

Rednecks live simple.

Git beer. Git er DONE!

No batteries needed.

Enough said?

Good stuff, Maynard!

Redneck Highrise

The redneck high-rise ain't for no city slicker.

TV gets real good reception up there.


redneck
redneck

Redneck BarBQ Grill

Retro rednecks got the barBQ gig covered!

Who needs a Weber Kettle?

Got this baby right from the Winn-Dixie parking lot.

She works great.

Best road kill barBQ ever!

redneck deluxe barBQ pit
redneck deluxe barBQ pit

DELUXE Redneck Barbecue Pit

Now this baby, had to hold it down hard.

Cement and all to keep it safe.

Cause every redneck in the county wanted to steal Bubba's delux barBQ pit.

Redneck High Chair for Baby

Keep it simple, sweetie.

Rednecks know this.

And they ALWAYS have duct tape around.

Works for time out too.

Just tape 'em up there. Done.

redneck pet carrier
redneck pet carrier

Redneck Pet Carrier

No need to go to the store to find a pet carrier, retro rednecks got better ideas!

As you can see,

at least the rednecks aren't filling up landfills with their beer trash.

This little number is just the right size and even has a carrying handle.

Git 'er done.

Redneck Swimming Pool

Wanna go for a swim?

Piece of cake.

Tarp and a pick-up, done!

redneck bass boat
redneck bass boat

Redneck Bass Boat

Retro redneck says, "Check out the bass boat!"

"This here's my bass boat and I'm tellin' ya ... Bubba and me catch a whole mess of bass with this rig,

ain't she somethin?

We built her outta stuff we found in JimBob's backyard... but don't tell JimBob, OK?"

redneck mullet hair
redneck mullet hair

Redneck Mullet

Retro rednecks ain't playing when it comes to their mullet.

Who SAYS mullet hair is out of style?

redneck doorbell
redneck doorbell

Redneck Doorbell

Got the doorbell gig covered, retro redneck style!

Just press the butt

... I mean button.

and don't be an ass about it.

Redneck Funeral

Rednecks just KNOW how to take it WITH 'em...

Who SAYS 'ya cain't take it with ya'?

Some rednecks like ta be buried along with their goodies, so we load 'em up in da U-haul trailer and take 'em to the graveyard.

redneck mansion
redneck mansion

Retro Redneck Mansion

This here's

the high-class

trailer park,

a perty dang

hifalutin place.

redneck burglar alarm
redneck burglar alarm

Redneck House Alarm

Rednecks got that house alarm gig covered...

This ain't no alarm for sissies, either.

They may LOOK harmless...

but cain't NOBODY git past these dawgs!

All they cost me is their dinner at night.

Dawgs know if they let anybody in here, then they'll BE dinner!

Redneck Weddings - Redneck Wedding Fashions

Click thumbnail to view full-size
redneck pick-up prank
redneck pick-up prank

Redneck Prank

Don't even THINK of messin' with my pick-up!

When rednecks want to pull a prank, they ain't foolin' around. Nothing gets another redneck meaner than messin' with the pick-up truck.

redneck
redneck

Redneck Space Shuttle

Proudly built by Bubba, the rocket scientist.

Some guy named Nasa wants the blueprint.

What's he talkin' bout???

Redneck USA Map

Redneck USA Map
Redneck USA Map
Redneck Baby Chair
Redneck Baby Chair

Redneck Baby Chair AND Teething Ring

Pretty dang clever, eh?

Rednecks are resourceful.

Always on alert for ways to use old stuff others throw away.

Redneck Airlines

All Aboard! Bring the Trailer, MAMA!

Just leave the driving to us.

We've gotcha covered.

Hitch the trailer up

and let's

"GIT 'ER DONE!"

What's your favorite retro redneck innovation featured here?

See results

POLL: YOUR Fav Redneck Creation?

Now it's time to vote YOUR favorite redneck creation.

Funniest? Most clever or unique?

Which one made ya howl or guffaw?

You can even say WHY you picked what ya did if ya want.

Tough to pick just one?

Leave a note down yonder in the guestbook thang.

Makes Bubba happy to find that y'all came to visit.

Convinced that rednecks ARE retro?

Clever?

Resourceful?

Creative?

...

Down below, leave a note.

Thanks,

Bubba

PS...

You can send your friends too.

if ya want.

Bye now.


Ya'll come back now,

ya hear?

— Bubba

The Retro Redneck Guestbook

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    • Flora Crew profile image

      Flora Crew 3 years ago from Evanston, Illinois

      Very funny!

    • profile image

      julieannbrady 5 years ago

      Pretty funny! Like the cat carrier and the swimming pool. They seem very practical to me.