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Daylight Savings – Jump Back Jack

Updated on November 2, 2009

I grew up in Arizona where we never changed our clocks and although I’ve lived out of the state of Arizona for more years than I lived there, it was during my formative years that I was there so a lot of that has just stuck with me. One of the things that has stuck with me is the fact that I have never understood (nor will I ever understand) the whole Daylight Savings thing. Sure, I’ve heard that it was done back in the day to assist farmers to get another hour of sunlight but other than that I don’t really understand it or see a need for it in this day and age (you’ll forgive me farmers). However this past weekend as I had an additional hour to sleep and then to get things done I have to admit that I started accepting and liking the whole idea of Daylight Savings just a little more. Daylight Savings – Jump Back Jack – Don’t Get Me Started!

As I found myself better rested and more ready to tackle my Sunday than most Sundays I started to think about how great it would be if you got an extra hour every weekend. Think about it for a minute. For those of us who tend to procrastinate and find ourselves truly frustrated at the end of each weekend that we didn’t accomplish all that we had intended to accomplish, this would just take the edge off a little. You know, like taking a low dosage of Xanax.

After awhile of fantasizing about the possibility of an extra hour every weekend (and being able to get my car washed, buy some fresh flowers for the house, going to the grocery store and more in that additional hour) I started taking the whole “extra hour” to its most ridiculous conclusion. You see I started thinking that if we indeed turned our clocks back every weekend then eventually I would be twenty years younger and have a twenty inch waist again. I know you’re thinking I’ve completely lost it right now but sometimes we have to indulge our fantasies to live in our realities. I started thinking about how much more hair I’d have on the back of my head and how much flatter my stomach would be. I started to get mighty excited.

I didn’t really want to go back and relive situations because I’ve always been someone who has tried his damnedest to not live in the land of regrets but instead I was letting myself be completely selfish in my thoughts. Much like the clock turning back once a year leaving us in our current reality, it wouldn’t be the world around me going back each weekend, just me and more to the point, my physical state. As each weekend gave me another hour, another wrinkle would fall off my face from around my eyes and my butt would begin to get much perkier again. I would become increasingly proud of my old buttocks on my current body and I would begin to dress to show off my best asset (as it were). There suddenly was no stopping me or the fantasy until I realized that that’s exactly what it was, a fantasy. I don’t care what anyone says, sure a hangover doesn’t feel great but there’s nothing worse than having your dreams or fantasies destroyed by real life. Argh! Curse you reality! (I found myself shaking my fist above my head at the universe not unlike Snoopy on the top of his doghouse cursing the Red Baron)

So while I still think the whole turning clocks backward and forward is stupid and confusing, I find that to no surprise, I’m much more inclined to understand (or should I say tolerate) it when it’s giving me an extra hour as opposed to taking one away. And though I realize there’s no real way to turn back time or aging, it’s fun to think about every once in awhile. Daylight Savings – Jump Back Jack – Don’t Get Me Started!

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