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Lovely Jubbly! British Words, Phrases & Cockney Rhyming Slang

Updated on January 4, 2015
I bet he's well chuffed that he remembered to get some bog roll a fortnight ago!
I bet he's well chuffed that he remembered to get some bog roll a fortnight ago!
  • Baccy

Tobacco. That's right, we can't even be bothered to say that whole word. Oh, and wacky baccy... Marijuana!

  • Barmy

Insane, bit cuckoo.

  • Bender

Homosexual. Don't say it, it's not nice! But just to you know.

  • Bits and bobs

Various, random objects, a bit of everything and anything.

  • Bog roll

Bog = toilet. Roll = toilet roll.

  • Bugger off! Sod off! Piss off!

Leave me alone, but less polite.

  • Chav

Okay, this one you'll need to know. Everybody in England says it. Picture somebody, usually between 14 and 30 but unfortunately they grow up (or apparently don't) and now could be any age up to 50. They're either shifting around the Poundshop looking dodgy or smoking rollies outside of the dole office, they're wearing tracksuit bottoms but have never exercised a day in their life, they wear hoodies with big brands across the front and shiny white trainers. Guys will usually wear a hat and the girls will have their hair scraped back so tight that it's actually deemed the term "a chav facelift". They drink Dutch Gold, smoke, swear and think they're tough.

  • Chuffed

To be very proud of something.

  • Dog's bollocks

This is something bloody brilliant, just great!

  • Donkey's years

A long long time.

  • Fall arse over tit

Fall over, but like, really embarrassingly.

  • Fit

"Eh up, she is well fit, init?!" That, my friend, is a compliment.

  • Fortnight

2 weeks.

  • Gobby

Annoyingly loud, usually accompanied by a stupid opinion. Chavs are also gobby.

  • Lost the plot

Gone completely mental.

Proper fit. Doesn't matter if you're minted or not to the NHS, she'll sort you out with that lurgy ya got.
Proper fit. Doesn't matter if you're minted or not to the NHS, she'll sort you out with that lurgy ya got.
  • Lurgy / poorly

To be ill.

  • Minted / jammy

Loaded rich.

  • On the piss

Getting splattered drunk.

  • On the pull / you've pulled

On a mission to get laid / totally getting laid.

  • Plonk

Cheap wine.

  • Rumpy pumpy

When you've pulled.

  • Spend a penny

Use the toilet.

  • Starkers

Naked.

  • Sweet Fanny Adams

S.F.A. Sweet f*ck all.

  • Tosser

Originally to "toss off" was to masturbate, but now tosser is just an idiot.

  • Up the duff

Preggers.

The Most Common Cockney Rhymes

The trick to understanding the infamous Cockney Rhyming Slang is knowing how they pair off. In most cases, Londoners wouldn't say the whole phrase - that would make for unnecessarily long sentences - they simply use the first word.

So let's have a butcher's at this list, eh?

  • Apples and pears = stairs
  • Artful Dodger = lodger
  • Baked Bean = Queen
  • Baker's Dozen = cousin
  • Barnet Fair = hair
  • Barney Rubble = trouble
  • Bricks and mortar = daughter
  • Brown Bread = dead
  • Butcher's hook = a look
  • Cream crackered = knackered
  • Daisy Roots = boots
  • Dog and bone = telephone
  • Duck and dive = skive
  • Giraffe = laugh
  • Gypsy's kiss = piss
  • Hank Marvin = starvin'
  • Jam jar = car
  • Kick and prance = dance
  • Lady Godiva = fiver
  • Pete Tong = wrong
  • Pony and trap = crap
  • Pork pies = lies
  • Sausage roll = goal
  • Septic tank = Yank
  • Skin and blister = sister
  • Tea leaf = thief
  • Trouble and strife = wife

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